A Husband's Voice

Back!

2011-08-24T15:48:00.000+08:00

Wow! I cannot believe time passes so quickly that it has been slightly over a year since my below post. Originally I knew I was always going to post again but I guessed I have been too occupied with other things and after a while I actually questioned myself if I want to pick it up again. During this period of ‘absence’ I have been receiving some encouraging comments and feedback and what tipped the scale for me was the comment from Celine. I received an email on my phone totally out of the blue a couple of weeks back and to my surprise it was from a reader who left a comment in my blog. It was a pleasant surprise so I thought I should give it another go.

Besides getting comments and emails directly from readers I have also received some invites to write advertorials for products and services on my blog. Funny thing is these people never followed up after the initial contact has been made. I remembered I was invited to bring my kids to spend a couple of hours at a certain enrichment centre and all I have to do was to write about their experience in my blog. Phone calls were made and I was told they will check with the boss (who invited me) to firm up a date and time but that was it. There was also an online magazine that contacted me and again no follow up was made after the initial contact. Maybe the problem lies with me personally. I knew I should not have asked for $2 per word.

Much has progressed and changed this past year, for starters we now have an additional maid to help care for the 3 monkeys. She was handpicked by the Mrs and interviewed by Ani. In order to ensure that the 2 maids can work together we let Ani played a significant role in the selection process and we took the advice of the agency to employ a fresh maid for 2 experienced maids may not like working together under one house hold. We wanted to ensure the new maid wasn’t bullied so we told Ani upfront that should this new maid quits due to unfair treatment from her then we will not be hiring an assistance anymore.

I am happy to say that since Anah joined us back in October last year we have not had any problem with the two of them. She being new is generally slower but overall she is nice to the kids and the kids take to her too so we are happy.

The other major change is both the Mrs and I have moved from our previous jobs and it is also due to this new job that I was very tied up. I was travelling on an almost monthly basis. Now that things have settled and I am onto a certain routine I will try my hands at blogging again.

Enough about us for I know you readers are not here to find out more about us. You want to know what has been going on with the children.

For starters Isaac is now in Nursery 2 and is more talkative and cheekier then ever if that is possible. He is at the stage where he is asking all the why’s and the where’s which is very hard for me to answer sometimes. Take “where” for example, on the way to pick the Mrs from work Isaac asked where were we going and I responded by telling him we were going to mummy’s office to pick her up. His next question was where and I told him the name of the building and he followed up with “but where is it daddy?” I tried explaining the location but as a 3yr old he wouldn’t know the difference of course and hence the entire journey I was bombarded with “where”.

The twins are now in childcare and the weird thing is it is cheaper to enrol them for full day then half day. This is after the government subsidy of course. It is a very good pricing strategy by these centres if you ask me.

Anyway I was never in favour of placing the twins there for the entire day for I want the 3 of them to spend more time together. If they are placed there for most of the day then Isaac will have very little time with his siblings.

The two of them are enjoying themselves very much at the childcare and they are picking up new words and songs in both Mandarin and English which is good.

Thankfully amongst the 3 kids only Luke give us the “Terrible Two’s” for he is really demanding and cranky when he did not get his way. He will throw tantrum by screaming and kicking and he will not let up. He is getting better because we understand each other more but he is still the hardest to compromise.

Hayley is very interesting for on one hand she is the easiest to compromise but on the other hand she is also the fiercest amongst the 3 of them. Due she is easily pacified she ended up having to give in the most. At times when the 3 of them all wanted a certain toy for example, Hayley will most likely be the one who sacrifices for she is usually fine if she can get another toy. The trick is we must ask her nicely. If her brothers snatched her toys she will go after them with her mouth wide open to bite them. Some of you have seen the below picture on my Facebook but here it is again for those who missed it.

I am very happy that we have Hayley for the behaviour and character between the boys and her is really very different. I am thrilled to be given the chance to be a father to both genders. I will share with you my experience in the future posts.

Survived!!

2010-08-03T21:35:00.002+08:00

We survived!! Yes we managed to pull through the two weeks without Ani! Although it was a little challenging but I am proud to announce that everyone got by without any major problem.

One of my earlier concerns was how Isaac will react to Ani missing. Will he be asking for her constantly? As he sleeps with Ani every night will he cry for her for the whole two weeks? In the end I am pleased that all my concerns and worries were unfounded. Not only did Isaac adapt excellently, he never once asks for Ani during bedtime.

There were a couple of occasions when he would ask where was Ani and he seemed satisfied with our reply that Ani went home. We are not sure if he understands by ‘home’ we meant her own home in Indonesia or he thought she was at our home waiting for him. Sometimes he will forget that Ani is not around and he will run out of our room calling out to her for sweets, biscuits or Milo. He never kick up any fuss when we said she went home so long as we got what he wanted for him.

As for the twins they are too young to really notice her missing. Perhaps they are only too happy to be seeing their dad more each day for this dad showered them each morning. Naturally I like to think that was the case.

These two weeks would not have been so smooth if we did not get the support from my parents and my sister’s maid. All of them chipped in whenever they could and since the Mrs and I could not be there all the time we are really grateful for that.

Here is a picture of all the kids having their milk around 5pm.

In the morning I need help feeding the twins and putting them to sleep for I had to run out to pick Isaac from school. We will have the Mrs back each afternoon which was great for the most challenging part of the day was between 3 to 8pm. This period is when all 3 of them will be up and about and they are really a handful.

After this experience we truly appreciate Ani more for we now understand much better what she has to go through on a daily basis.

Take a look at my bruises (different legs) from handling the kids.

Not only that I actually developed sore throat towards the end of the two weeks from the constant screaming and shouting at the kids. So much so that Isaac can mimick after me now. Some of my favourite phases are:

Don’t run!

Too near! (when the kids stood right in front of the TV)

Children come! (this is what Isaac will say these days whenever he calls for his siblings)

Come in! (whenever he ventured out to the balcony and play with the broom and pebbles)

We actually asked Ani to make sure she drinks honey water regularly since her return. God knows she needs it.

Another challenging aspect of caring for the kids are the 2 weekends. We cannot stay at home for we will certainly be driven mad so we need to plan outings that included my parents. Thankfully being the doting grandparents that they are they gracefully accepted overtime ‘work’ and went out with us.

Below are videos and pictures that we captured during our outings which include Marina Square, West Coast Park and Terminal 3.

Here is a video of Hayley smelling a flower which was given to her. One fine day we brought the twins to the Botanic Gardens for a morning picnic after dropping Isaac off in school. A nice lady taking a liking to the twins gave Hayley a flower and she surprised us all by holding it to her nose and took a sniff at it. Who taught her that?!?!?!

Here is a video of Luke falling asleep at Marina Square and we were trying very hard to prevent him from sleeping. The reason was because it was almost 7pm and we were worried if he slept then he will not be able to sleep when we got home.

For the record we failed and he had a good nap in the car but thankfully it was only a rather short one which did not really disrupt his bedtime when we got home.

Below are pictures that we took of Isaac having fun at West Coast Park. Unfortunately his siblings could not join him for they are too young and more importantly Hayley’s dislike of the sand.

This was taken at Terminal 3. See how small Isaac is standing next to the XC60.

Notice how Hayley will spread her legs to prevent from touching the sand?

After these two weeks the Mrs really felt sorry for what Ani has to go through each day and in all fairness she did not sign up for this in the beginning so we are now considering employing another maid but that is a topic I will save for later.

Helpless

2010-06-28T13:38:00.002+08:00

How time flies for Ani has recently finished her contract with us and has signed another 2 year deal with a pay increment. We are happy that she has decided to stay for she certainly didn’t sign up to take care of 3 babies in the beginning. When she arrived we only had Isaac but along the way you can say that her workload has increased by 3 folds. So deep down the Mrs and I were a little concerned that she may want to see her contract out and look for something perhaps a little less hectic.

So she will be heading home for her well deserved 2 weeks break and unlike her we are certainly not looking forward to it at all. Over the 2 years we are spoilt by her for we need not have to worry about preparing the kids and packing the necessary stuffs whenever we plan to go out. All we had to do was inform her of our plans and give her about half an hour and we will be good to go.

Changing the kids is the easy part hence we do it ourselves. It is the huge bags that we bring out that are very challenging. You cannot imagine the different kinds of stuffs that she packs in there in anticipation of the kids (well mainly Isaac’s) demand. Some examples besides the necessities such as milk powder, diapers, change of clothes, hot water etc; are sweets like the gummy bears, biscuits, packets Milo as well as this yogurt drink and some other stuffs that I cannot think of now. All I know is whenever Isaac demanded for something more often than not she will have it in those big bags. When the twins get really cranky in the car she will also have the right snacks to pacify them.

Now with her gone for 2 weeks, I believe we will be at a lost to a certain degree and won’t be surprised that we will miss out on an item or two.

There are other issues as well. Since we learned that the Mrs was pregnant with the twins Isaac has been sleeping with Ani for obvious reason. Now we are taking turns to put him to sleep each night. The really good thing here is he doesn’t have to be put to bed by Ani which means we can do it but we need to know his bedtime habits too.

Originally the Mrs wanted to take a 2 week break from work so the both of us can try and take care of them ourselves but her boss wasn’t too thrilled with the idea. Then the alternative was to look for a part-time babysitter to help out at my parents’ place every day until our return after work. The Mrs went to the various forums to search for recommended nannies and agencies. We actually interviewed a couple of them even. The cost for this arrangement will maybe set us back by about one grand easy. Not too many nannies are too keen to take up the position as well once they learned that we have 3 kids even though we promised them that my parents and to a certain extend I will be there to help out. We assured them that they will not be the only one to take care of all 3 of them at any one time but they are still worried and I can also understand why. One agency was even crazy (or stupid) enough to propose charging us 3 times the cost for having 3 babies to which we responded wouldn’t it make more sense then for us to hire 3 nannies?!?! For the company’s sake I seriously hope she is not the owner.

In the end after much thinking, planning and discussion with my parents we have decided against hiring outside help. One thing is my parents are not too crazy about the idea of having a stranger over at their place and more importantly the kids may not take to her at all.

So here’s the plan. I will send Isaac and the Mrs to school and work every morning and I will then head back to my parents’ place to bath and feed the twins. My parents and I will take care of them until the Mrs come home from work around 2pm. Her boss has compromised with her taking half day everyday for the 2 weeks. In between I will also be going to pick Isaac from school. Since I am working from home and my work allows me certain flexibility I will arrange for my appointments and meetings to the late afternoon when the Mrs can take over from me.

On paper it certainly looked very doable but I know we (the Mrs and I) will probably be in for some shock when the time comes. I truly believe that this little experience will make us appreciate more what Ani and my parents have to do on a daily basis.

It will certainly be a very tiring 2 weeks for we have to wake up much earlier to get Isaac changed, fed and dressed for school. We will also have to feed the twins before leaving the house. Putting them to sleep will not be so easy as well for currently we take one kid each at night but this will not be possible then.

Planning on what to do and where to bring them during the weekends will also not be easy. We definitely cannot stay at home the entire weekend with the kids for we, the parents will probably go mad. However to bring them out will require much work, planning and execution. To care for all 3 kids who are now running (Isaac), walking briskly (Luke) and unsteadily (Hayley) will be tough. The twins are at the stage where they do not want to be carried or be left sitting in the stroller. They will be repeating “walk walk” non-stop and struggling.

If you would like to volunteer your time in helping or have any suggestions at all you know how to reach me.

Lessons!!

2010-06-08T12:04:00.002+08:00

As most of you know parenthood is new to the Mrs and I hence there are many lessons to be learnt. Although we have 3 kids but as their age difference is small our experience is really limited to how we handled Isaac. However as we all know every child is special and unique in their own way handling them requires very different technique.

Recently we learnt 2 very important lessons and those of you who are on Facebook with me will probably know of it by now.

The most important one is: Never trust your thermometer 100%.

We are very blessed in that up until about 3 weeks ago we have never had to bring any of our children to the emergency ward of any hospital. We usually let them ride out their sickness and until they turn 1 we abstain from administering any form of medication. Like our PD always says, medicines really just remove the symptoms but it is not the cure. Even when they have fever we will sponge them and watch their mood before we decide whether or not to administer medicine. Watching their mood and appetite is the key thing.

About 3 weeks ago Isaac had fever and Ani was taking his temperature every few hourly and since he is already past 2 years old we are more relaxed on giving him medicine. Unfortunately his fever never really quite subsided and in fact got higher. In the evening when we got home from work the readings were around 39 degree with the highest for that day being 39.5. We could also tell that he is not his usually cheerful self although he wasn’t cranky just a little more “manja” then usual.

We decided to bring him to KK emergency ward and we were shocked that the readings the nurse doctor took was around 40.5 degree because we brought our own thermometer and along the way and while waiting for our turn we were frequently taking his temperature and it never passed the 40 degree mark.

Now the weird thing here was when I took my temperature with our own and then with theirs the readings match. But when it comes to Isaac the difference is about 2 degrees.

After the entire episode I went down to the manufacturer and got them to check the thermometer for me they advise me that sometimes even a faulty one can take accurate readings up to about 38 degree but anything higher it won’t be accurate anymore.

When they checked the thermometer they found out that the area around the sensor was dirty and a little rusty. That was the cause for the inaccurate readings and after cleaning it thoroughly it worked fine and readings above 40 degree was measured accurately as well.

Looking back it was a rather scary experience for this meant that Isaac was probably at about 41.5 degree at one time for the highest recorded was 39.5.

I hope you learn from our experience and get another thermometer to be kept at home and should the reading be above 38 degree then have a second reading with the spare one just to be sure.

Now on a lighter side of things, I learnt another lesson and this time it was thanks to Luke.

The funny lesson: Always cover the toilet bowl!

The children have a habit of using our iPhones to play and watch the many Apps that we got for them. In fact Isaac is so good with it he knows how to launch the YouTube and look for his favourite videos. This by the way was learnt all on his own. Before he turned 1 he already know how to slide to unlock the phone and he could do it upside down as well.

Anyway back to Luke. One morning as I was washing up in the bathroom the twins were just walking around messing things up in the wardrobe area. After a while they were trying to come into the bathroom with me. I used my leg to block Hayley from coming in while the door was half closed but little did I know Luke has silently open the door and walked in. Next I heard him say “Throw!” and before I knew it I heard something dropped into the toilet bowl and to my horror it was the Mrs’s iPhone.

I shouted “Oh No!!” and the Mrs came running in thinking that one of the twins had hurt themselves. When she saw Luke in the bathroom she thought what happened to him and carried him right away. I honestly believed that my instant reaction saved him for when the Mrs learned that he is fine then everything else is secondary including her iPhone. Plus I knew she wanted to change it long ago due to the many scratches and teeth marks but as it was in perfect operational condition she cannot have it changed.

Now I know many of you readers are iPhone owners and in case you’re not aware, when under warranty your Telco will replace your iPhone free if the problem is not caused by water. In our case where clearly it is due to water then the cost will be S$350 when under warranty.

Fortunately SingTel decided to replace mine for free and it was due to my monthly bill otherwise we all know who will be paying for the replacement.............Luke!

Updates!

2010-05-13T14:35:00.020+08:00

Wow! I believe this is the longest period for not updating this blog. I think I really need to put in more effort before all you remaining readers disappear as well. There is however a very good reason for not updating this time and that is due to some changes at the work front. Due to a change of company I have been very busy with all the usual handover and getting things ready for the new environment.

My new role as a consultant allow me to work a lot from home. Since this is a one man show for now so my work hours are very flexible which means I can take care of more household and children stuffs. Take fetching Isaac home from school for example, I certainly have been doing more of that lately. Running around brining Ani for her medical, collecting free diapers and exchanging shoes for the right size are examples of things on my “to-do” list.

Below is a video clip of Isaac (1st kid on the right with a pink toy hanging from his bag) being led from his class to the pickup point. This is how it is done on a daily basis when they move to and from their classes. The children are made to stand two by two and there is this ropewith rings in the middle for them to hold onto.

Before you all get excited and think that I am now a part-time SAHD I should clarify that the children are still going to their grandparents as usual. Not sure about your kids but I will not be able to do much work with them around for the moment they see me fire up the laptop they will all come running and stumbling (the twins) over much like moths being drawn to the flame. They will want to hammer away on the keyboard or poke at the LCD screen. Besides, I am still going out on an almost daily basis for my customers’ visits.

There are certainly new developments since my last post about the Mrs going away for her Japan trip. Isaac I believed has entered the much talked about “Terrible Two” stage but personally I think either he is the mild type or what we read about were much exaggerated. I would like to think that for Isaac’s case it is the former rather than the latter. He is much more vocal these days especially about the things that he doesn’t want so it is not uncommon to hear him say “No!”, “I don’t want” and “我不要”. It is rather fun teasing and irritating him sometimes but insisting “Yes” and “要” only to wait for his repeated response. I know it is probably not right but surely a parent can have some fun at his kids' expense right?

His behaviour seems to rubbing off on Luke for he is also saying “No” whenever he doesn’t want something and if we insist he will actually say “don’t want” although it is not that clear.

Since attending Nursery Isaac’s vocabulary has expanded by leaps and bounds. We can hear new words or phrases coming out of him on an almost daily basis. Some of the most recent ones are:

- Daddy come
- Daddy follow me
- Step by step
- See, cute baby

The twins are now walking about unassisted and my biggest fear is they may fall off our bed. They like to climb onto our bed and walk about but as they are still not that steady and strong they may just topple and fall off the bed. Although our bed is rather low, we recently changed it with them in mind, we’re still weary of the damage such a fall can bring.

Seeing the twins walking side by side unsteadily is rather amusing so I will try and find a chance to capture it on video and post it here so be sure to check back here. I only noticed they look rather amusing last Saturday when they insisted on getting on the floor during dinner at this famous steamboat place near Golden Mile. They were so insistent that even though we did not have shoes for them we let them walked about bare footed. We pick a quieter walkway of course. They were wearing rather matching outfits that day and it made them look rather cute.

Oh I have always wanted to mention that toddlers are similar to zombies that we see in movies. Like the zombies these toddlers are always trying to put your finger in their mouths to bite. If you are carrying them you have to beware that they may just take a chunk off your shoulders too (just experienced that last evening with Hayley). Even when it comes to walking they stumble around with their arms bent and raised in front of them just like the zombies too. If you don’t believe me grab the nearest toddler next to you and observe. A little make-up will greatly enhance the effect too.

We have found a family activity that we will be sticking to almost every Sunday except when it rains and that is to bring them to the pool. I like bringing them to the Singapore Poly Guild House pool for there is a very shallow part for the twins to walk and crawl on. At first the twins did not enjoy the water much and it required about half an hour for them to like being in the water but these days they have no problem soaking in it. Isaac especially is loving it. I enjoyed it so much that I went out to get some water gun for us while my dad contributed the rubber duckies for the twins.

Here are some pictures of the kids having fun!

His trademark cheeky smile!

This is the reason why we are heading back every weekend.

Isaac and his water gun.

See how happy he is!

Of all the 3 kids Luke takes to water the best.

The twins and their rubber duckies!

Anyone looking for housekeeper? Cute right?

Volunteers?

2010-04-12T17:48:00.005+08:00

In the past before we were parents the Mrs would bring her parents to nearby countries for short vacations every once in a while. She was always guilty that she was unable to spend more time with them so she will take them to short getaways while they are still mobile.

Ever since we became parents she has stopped this practice due to obvious reason but I know deep down she would very much like to continue. It is not easy trying to be a wife, mother and good daughter at the same time.

The past two years have not been very nice as we witnessed the passing of our friends’ parents. Friends who are actually about the same age as us which means their parents are probably around the same age as our parents as well. Early this year we learned of another friend whose mum was diagnosed with cancer and it was at the advanced stage already. Instead of opting to go through the chemo therapy she decided to live out her remaining days happy and she started off by visiting Japan first.

I believed that incident triggered something within the Mrs and she discussed with me if it is alright for her to bring her folks for a holiday. What started out to be a trip to Taiwan has now morphed into a trip to see the cherry blossom in Japan. So come this Saturday she will bring her parents to Hokkaido for a week. There will only be the three of them so it is not exactly a holiday for the Mrs for she will be taking care of the old folks but I believe seeing them enjoy themselves is reward enough.

So starting this weekend it will be just Ani and I taking care of the three kids. There are minimum changes in the day since I have always been involved in preparing the kids to go to their grandparents place and Isaac to school. Small changes are instead of having the Mrs bring Isaac to the teachers at his school I will have to part my car and run in. Rest of the days will be pretty same-o same-o for they will be at my parents place until I come back for them in the early evening.

Without the Mrs I can be home earlier actually which is not necessary a good thing. This automatically means I will be bringing them home earlier also and once home Ani will proceed with her daily chores of cleaning up the place and it will be them versus me for about 2 to 3 hours before they turn in.

Hmmmm….. maybe I should get Ani to deprive them their afternoon naps so they will retire earlier in the evening. Muhahahahaha!!!! Just kidding Darling.

Honestly I am not at all worried about sending Isaac to school on my own or tackling them alone in the evening. Ani has proven to be of great help and my kids are nice to us for they all sleep by 9pm which leaves me with a lot of ‘me’ time. With the Mrs in Japan I think it is time to buy another one or two Xbox game. Woohoo!!!

Where I need help my readers are what to do and where to go this weekend. Usually with the Mrs around it is already not easy bringing the 3 of them out. Somehow we always managed but with only Ani and I, going out is not such a good idea at all.

Recently I noticed we are attracting a lot of stares and attention whenever we eat out. The fact that the waiters have to remove 3 normal chairs and replace them with 3 highchairs will already arouse people’s curiosity. When they see us walking in and taking our seats I can almost sense their stares and gossips. They will discuss amongst themselves if all 3 kids are ours and seeing the twins they will have more questions; if they’re twins and the age gap between Isaac and the twins. Once they determined that they are all ours you can definitely sense their astonishment. “I wonder how they cope” and “What were they thinking” are probably the general sentiment.

Back to the dining table, Isaac will be demanding to feed himself and will want this and that before he decides it is time to explore the restaurant. The twins will usually be good and quiet so long as we continue to stuff food in their mouths. Come to think of it maybe their mouths are too full to make any noise. However even they have their off days sometime and with the 3 of them behaving the way they do these people are probably taking pity on us.

With the Mrs away I can assure you that we will not be eating out and if we do it will surely involve my parents. My main concern is what to do with them in the day? Where can I bring them to burn off their energy? Places like Polliwogs are no good because while Isaac can enjoy with me chasing after him Ani will be left to watch after the twins alone.

Staying at home the entire weekend is also a terrible idea for tackling them for 2 to 3 hours is tiring enough I can’t imagine having to manage them for so many hours. They will still stick to their daily nap routine but it still leaves us with a good 4 to 5 hours of activities to keep them occupied.

My bro, Mike was kind enough to invite us to hang around with him and his family this weekend for he said they can help us take care of the twins. Now that is a friend indeed.

So now the question is do I have another good friend in you my readers? Any volunteers to help babysit this weekend?

Favourite

2010-03-23T21:04:00.004+08:00

From the moment we brought the twins home we were asked time and again if we have a favourite amongst the 3 kids. Who do we prefer more? Frankly speaking I did question if I will ever have a favourite since it is only human to like something or someone more than others.

There were some concerns from Isaac’s Godma and Grandma that he may be neglected now that he has 2 younger siblings and I am still not sure if we managed to dismiss their unfounded concern after so many months.

My mum’s love and favouritism shown towards Isaac is still unmatched. Everyone can tell that Isaac is clearly her favourite grandchild. We have to monitor though in case things get out of hand. An example happened the other day when Isaac snatched Hayley’s toy causing her to cry and my mum immediately gave another toy to Hayley to try and pacify her. When I saw this I corrected her and returned the original toy to Hayley and told Isaac off. I explained to my mum that Hayley should not have to settle for another toy just because Isaac wanted the first one.

Don’t get me wrong though for Isaac is not the bully at home. He loves his siblings and is ever ready to kiss, hug and sayang them. It is just that when it comes to sharing toys he is not quite there yet. The twins do not fare any better as well and this is an area that we are monitoring and working on. Isaac is still a toddler after all so sometimes he doesn’t understand the full extend of the things that he should not do.

I made him a promise when we know he will be a ‘big’ brother at a young age that he will not miss out on anything from being a toddler. I have always reframed from imposing the responsibilities of an elder brother on him. He is still a big baby to me and he knows that. When I ask him where is daddy’s big baby, he will point to his own head and say “nai”. I want him to grow up at his own pace without having to worry about being a big brother to the twins. Perhaps in another couple of years then he will take on the role gradually.

When the twins were younger they were not showing much of their personalities and characters so there wasn’t much to compare between the 3 children. Some of you readers may not agree to us comparing but I like to think that it is a very natural thing to do. We compare things like the stages of motor skills development to how fast their teeth grow, to their speech development and of course their character and temper. We even compare how much milk they take and at what pace too. The way they sleep and at what time they sleep and how long their nap last.

Now that the twins are a little older the comparison is getting more interesting because their personalities are beginning to show. Take Hayley for example. She has always been the quiet and demure one while Luke is always very demanding and Isaac is well ……… Isaac. Then we begin to wonder if there is any truth to the theory that having more than one hair whorl means a person is “naughtier”. You see, 妹妹 is the only one in the family with 2 hair whorls. But the theory may have some truth after all for these days 妹妹 is certainly no push over. When her brothers take her toys she will scream at them and will try and get them back. Very often her scream is way louder and we can see from her face just how angry they made her. I can already see this girl standing toe to toe against any boy bully in her life.

I have also heard stories that being the middle child in the family is not good. They are often neglected and they grow up aloof and weird in some cases. I personally do not have this experience because people around me are either the eldest or youngest. I don’t believe I have too many friends who are the middle child. So any input from you guys will be helpful.

Note: By Input I do not mean scare so please do not scare us for in case you forgot we have a middle child in Luke! Thank you!

With Luke nicknamed “Blur” didn’t really help the matter too. In his defense he is actually much better now. He smiles a lot more and has many expressions as well but just not in front of the camera. I have posted the below clip to support my case and to help him get rid of that nickname.

Now back to age old question of whether or not we have a favourite all I can say is that an experiment I conducted not too long ago probably summed it all up for us.

Back in September the Mrs and I went to Hong Kong for a short getaway without the kids and I remembered wondering out loud to the Mrs if we could find out who we miss more during the trip. I guess I thought if we know who we miss more then that will probably mean we favour that child more. Frankly I am a little surprised but very pleased with the outcome.

Chinese New Year

2010-03-11T12:51:00.000+08:00

I have never quite enjoyed Chinese New Year and I believe it is due to the fact that I hate to make small talks. When I was younger the topic will always revolve around schools and studies and when I started working it will be about the job of course. Thankfully I don't think I have very much experience on the "So when are you getting married" bit but I believe it was because I got married at a rather young age. Then of course we won't be spared on the "So when are you having babies" question.

My dad's side of the family is small so each year we only need to go to one place and spend about 2 hours there. If we meet all the relatives then fine if not better luck next year. This arrangement suits me just nice for I will always be free from the afternoon of the 1st day onwards and it will usually be movies and mahjong from then on! Woohoo!

Then along came the Mrs. Her family and extended families are huge and they will all gather at her mum's place on the 2nd day. Being the boyfriend I will of course go over and hang around but I will be "let off" after a couple of hours to meet my mahjong kakis. This arrangement lasted until we got married of course. Once I am family the duration of my stay was automatically lengthened (I believe it was amongst the fine prints on the wedding certificate along with the "I cannot sleep before her" clause). Although there were some years when my dad needed me to fill in for their mahjong session hence I was able to make an early departure.

Now that I am a parent the Chinese New Year (CNY) has brought a different set of joy but I still feel the same set of pain. No, actually come to think of it, it is worse!

Let us begin with the pre CNY days! One has to admire the Mrs's genuine joy and excitement for the CNY. She will always bug me to go with her to Chinatown to shop for the New Year decorations and goodies. I must add that being pregnant, be it with Isaac or the twins never dampen her spirit. She will still want to go. This year was even better for she decided that the 3 kids should not miss out on such nice festive mood so Ani and I were ordered to gear up and bring all the kids along. Needless to say it wasn't easy but honestly it wasn't that bad either. However I dare not imagine how are we going to cope with all 3 of them next year for the twins will definitely be able to run around and I am positive the Mrs will still want to continue her little tradition of going to enjoy the festive mood.

Seeing the kids dressed up in their chi-na clothing is probably the highlight for me. For this I have to thank the Mrs for her last minute scrambling through the online as well as actual retail shops for the cutest little clothing for all 3 of them. Searching for one is already hard as some you will no doubt testify to but to scrounge around for three is something else altogether. We should probably start earlier next year.

One of the differences is unlike previous years we have to wait for the relatives to come so they can take a look at the kids. For those who could not make it we will have to go to their place to visit. I guess I should be happy that these people are taking such an interest in my kids and maybe I will in years to come but by then I’m rather sure their interest would have diminished.

The most tiring and hardest part was the running around after my kids at the relatives' place to make sure they don't damage anything or injure themselves. Isaac was climbing up and down the sofas, opening cupboard doors and even rearranging some of the furniture to his own liking. Luke for now at least was restricted to crawling around but that did not stop him from getting up and reaching for the drinks and goodies that were laid out on the coffee table.

Then there was Hayley who didn't fancy strangers holding her especially in our presence. Unfortunately for her being the only girl in the family and also the only grand daughter available all the other relatives wanted to hold her for a while. Besides watching over the boys I had to constantly look out for her to make sure she was not too traumatised by all the passing around. I'm certain it wasn't very pleasant at all for her and thank goodness the boys are generally alright with strangers carrying them.

From the many status updates and comments I saw on Facebook during that period I am sure I was not the only one who found it tough. In fact there were a number of people who were pleased that the CNY was over and stressing on how tired they were. I cannot imagine how an ex-neighbour of mine managed to bring her kids for visitings during the entire 15 days.

Having 3 kids also has this funny little effect on us. We will try and avoid giving red packets to strangers with children in the same room for we actually felt bad that should we give them one they will have to return us with three. As a result we will just shake on it and wished each other well. I could have sworn I saw a certain sense of relief on their face (kidding). I'm sorry friends, there is no running away for you guys so if you want to breakeven then you know there is really only one thing to do.

Here are some of the pictures that I have selected for this post. I will upload the rest of the pictures on my Facebook at a later date when I can find the time.

Isaac still with a little of blue black just under his eye.

For once Luke was not paying attention to the camera. Otherwise he will not have expression again.

Hayley with her usual big and round eyes.

Our pride and joy!

The traditional potrait taken during CNY at Godma's place!

Twins' 1st Birthday

2010-02-18T15:26:00.001+08:00

It's official! I'm considered old and it is not because of the New Year or this being my year (Tiger). There was a recent study done and it has been found that the younger generation's interest in blogging and twittering has dropped over the years. These days they are more into "micro-blogging" like status updating on Facebook. The reason I took so long to blog was because I was struggling within if I should continue to blog and be deemed as "Out" and "so 2006" or should I remain with the "In" crowd and only update my FB status. In the end I decided to remain true to my age.

Seriously, with the Twins' birthday celebration, the Chinese New Year as well as work, we have been really busy. Furthermore I had to wait for about 2 weeks to receive the thumb stick with all the photographs from the photographer that we engaged, no thanks to the air show where he had to do some work there. This is the real reason why it took me so long to have this post up.

Speaking of Photographers, blogging does have its advantages. Take you all for example, amongst you readers there are already a couple of you who are in the photography business. The few that I had contacted and considered were also very kind to offer me discounts. Maybe you appreciate the financial strain in having to raise 3 kids through reading my blog. In the end due to the clash of schedules we were not able to engage the one that we wanted but this reader was very nice to recommend her associate to us.

Just like Isaac's birthday we kept this party to a small group of friends and families only. As a matter of fact the people that we invited are probably more or less the same. Another similarity with Isaac's party is that the theme is also ice cream but instead of Ben & Jerry's we held it this time at Swensen's @ ION. Since we were celebrating 2 birthdays we figured we could not offer only a single scope of ice cream to our guests. We need an ice cream buffet for them!

Typically being the hosts we did not have much opportunity to truly enjoy the ice cream buffet. We were busy going around mingling and making sure that our guests were comfortable and enjoying themselves. I only managed one round of ice cream and only 2 scoops at that. I believe I will try and go back for a proper experience. Besides the many flavours, there were also many different kinds of toppings as well as fondues, waffle and many other ways of having your ice cream.

We would like to extend our heartfelt thanks to all those who made it to celebrate this joyous occasion with us. Below are just a handful of the pictures that were taken on that day. For the rest of it you know where to find them. Guess I'm not so "Out" after all huh?!

Meet the birthday girl!

Meet the birthday boy!

Meet the big brother!

Meet the family!

The Cake!

These were the souvenirs that we gave to all our guests on that day.

What were they exactly?

M&M's chocolates printed with the twins' faces!

These were the wordings that we chose to be printed on the M&M's.

Picture of Luke printed on the M&M's!

Picture of Hayley printed on the M&M's!

Don't they look good enough to eat?

From PM to AM

2010-01-28T10:26:00.001+08:00

I mentioned in an earlier post that this year will bring many changes for Isaac but I wasn’t counting on two things. Firstly Isaac had to re-experience another learning environment so soon after starting school and secondly, I had to wake up before 7 each morning from now on.

This week is like another new school term for Isaac because we had switched him to a morning class. We were all along hoping to get into the morning session but at the time of application for this school we were already on the waitlist so there was no need to even discuss which session we preferred. When they called us to tell us that they were opening new classes we happy to be have Isaac enrolled even if he was assigned to the afternoon session.

Then came the call last Thursday. I was offered the chance to move Isaac to the morning session. I told the lady I need to discuss this with the Mrs, Ani and my parents before getting back to them. After all it involves a number of people when it comes to sending and picking him up from school.

Surprisingly everyone agreed that it is a good move although my mum was a little reluctant. Like me she was concerned about Isaac having to readapt to another class and teachers. He has just gotten used to the original class as well as the teachers, he would even say goodbye to my dad when entering the classroom, and we have to move him now.

He being in the morning session is good for everyone because this way the Mrs and I get to drop him off at the school each morning while my dad only has to pick him up at 11am. This compared to when he was in the afternoon session and my dad had to send and pick him. I believe deep down we all know this is a better arrangement even though we know Isaac might have to “suffer” a little during the first week or so. Better now then when he is really comfortable months later right?

This Monday was a little trying for all of us. We used to be able to sleep till about 7.30 each morning but we have to wake up like latest by 7 each morning. In order not to be late we will have to organize our own things each night.

As expected Isaac was not too happy when he was introduced to his new classroom and teachers. He actually turned cranky and cried a little when we handed him over to the new form teacher.

Oh I forgot to add that because most of the students in this new class are rather settled down, the teacher has decided to allow the kids to stay for the entire 3 hours. Parents who are concerned can choose to still pick up their kids half way. When I was given the option last week I had already decided to let him stay for the full 3 hours. I had an agreement with the teacher though, I will be on standby somewhere and if she finds that Isaac cannot last the 3 hours she is to call me and I will pick him up. Hence I was on childcare leave on Monday.

Besides getting a little cranky for the first 2 mornings when we led him to his class Isaac actually did quite well. He lasted the 3 hours and was seen having fun in class. The next two days he fared even better for he isn’t as cranky. There is however still this little issue that we have to sort out. He doesn’t like us to put on the socks and shoes for him. This has been the case since day 2 of the term. Each time someone puts on the socks and shoes for him he will refuse and cry.

Initially we thought that perhaps the shoes were tight so he was uncomfortable so the Mrs and I went out one evening to buy him bigger size shoes. Isaac is wearing size 6 now so we wanted to get size 7 but with a little silver on the side. They only had size 8 for that so I told the Mrs to buy it and pick another one in size 7. My rationale is he will be wearing it eventually anyway. At least this saves me the trouble of having to search in the future.

His current size 6

His new size 7 shoes on standby.

His size 8 shoes for the future!

Can you tell the difference?

The best part is we realized after we got home that actually his size 6 shoes are still alright. It might be another few more weeks before he needs to change them. So now we are back at where we started. Why doesn’t he like us to put the socks and shoes on? Some might say it could be psychological as in he doesn’t want to go to school but if that is the case then he should have cried each morning when Ani puts on the uniform for him. Any suggestions or advice from you experience parents will be appreciated.

Speaking of socks, something happened many months ago and I thought I should share with you for I find it quite funny.

I bought myself a few pairs of socks to wear with my snickers and when the Mrs saw it for the first time she remarked:

Notice the 'L' on the sock?

Mrs (a little proud and a little mockingly at the same time): Wah someone has to wear size “L” socks now ah?

Me (a little worried and walking hurriedly over): Sure or not? Can’t be right? Thought they are all free size?

Mrs (teasingly): You see. (Pointing the L on my sock)

Notice the 'R'?

Me (relieved and proudly): Aiya no lah! Hello! “L” is for left! See! (Picking up the other sock)

Mrs: hahahahaha (I could have sworn I could almost sense the disappointment in her)

First week in school

2010-01-19T10:06:00.000+08:00

Do you all remember how it all went down during your very first day of school? I for one remembered mine very clearly for some strange reason. It was not as if it was very traumatic in the first place.

Like most of you (I imagine we are all about the same age right?) I did not attend any playschool or nursery so my first year was straight to kindergarten and I attended the good old neighbourhood PAP ones.

From what I can recalled my Mum was asking me if I would cry in school and I assured her that I would not but I was affected by the other crying kids (really it’s true) and ended up crying too. What happened next was very interesting. I remembered that there was this dark kitchen in the PAP facility and the teachers were taking the crying kids, one at a time, into the kitchen area only to return without them. Suddenly alarm bells started going off in my mind. I probably thought that the teachers brought the noisy kids in to be slaughtered so I stopped crying there and then. As I got older I learned that the teachers brought the cry babies to their parents through the backdoor.

That was about my experience but guess you weren’t here for that right? What you really want to know is how Isaac fared during his first week in school. Not how his old man went through all those years ago.

You will be glad to know that Isaac did extremely well on his first day. You can tell he was excited and he even posed for some photo taking. He was also excited to be carrying his own bag and tumbler. When we arrived he was quietly observing everything that was happening around him and wasn’t cranky at all. He walked quietly besides my dad and was led into his classroom unknowingly. Since we opted not to remain in class we left the classroom as soon as he was in. The poor fellow didn’t even know what hit him. He probably turned around and no one was there anymore.

He was alright in the beginning sitting down at the same table while a mum was reading to her child. He then got bored and wandered around on his own. However he soon started to miss us and wanted to go to the main door and that was when the teacher picked him up but he continued to point at the door. She then carried him to all the different corners of the classroom to try and distract him but we could see that he was pouting and his eyes were red and teary but full credit to him for he did not cry (yes, to this father, tearing and crying are two different things). Not wanting to risk being spotted by him, kids know to look at the glass panel on the doors; we left to do our own things only to come back about 15 minutes before his classes finishes to pick him.

When we came back we were glad to see that he was all settled down and looked to be having fun although he wasn’t smiling. He was one of the first few to be released and to see the bright and cheeky smile certainly helped us, the parents and grandparents overcome our anxiety. It is also good to learn that my boy does not bare grudges and yes you read right, Isaac was indeed escorted by 4 adults on his first day of school.

The feedback from his teacher was he only cried when she asked him to eat his meal. We forgot to mention to her in the beginning that he is not too big on eating so let him be if he chooses not to eat. Hence without knowing the teacher tried to get him to eat time and again which Isaac must have felt like being forced to eat hence he cried. He apparently returned to his usual self once meal time was over.

On his second day we could sense that something was wrong because he refused to put on the uniform and when we put on his white shoes he cried. I was worried that he would remembered his 1st day in school and not be as cooperative for the coming days and my worry came through but only to a certain extend.

Thankfully he was only a little cranky when putting on his uniform and he was alright during the journey to school. He only acted up again when I carried him into the hall leading to his class. By the time we entered his classroom he was crying already. I did what I was supposed to do and that was to simply hand him to the teacher and left the classroom with him crying.

During the next 10 minutes or so we were playing hide and seek by the glass panel trying to catch a glimpse to see if he had stopped or was he still miserable. I am proud to say that he stopped crying within 5 minutes of me leaving him. Since his class was only for 1.15 hours during this 1st month we waited in school and we made regular visits to take a peek at how he was doing.

The same continued for the 3rd day and we saw improvement on Thursday and Friday for my dad reported that although he turned cranky at home when they changed him, he did not cry in school at all.

That ended our very nervous first week of Isaac attending school. I am truly grateful that he did not cry and wailed like some of the other kids. Looking at the parents’ body language and apologetic look, I almost wanted to go over and tell them that it was okay and as fellow parents, we understand.

Fussing over and getting him ready for his 1st day in school.

Waiting in line to be brought to his class. Looked kind of lost ya?

His cheeky self before school!

'Motherly' Father

2010-01-08T11:21:00.002+08:00

This week I have seen the Mrs sniggered and roll her eyes at me countless times. Looking back now it is also possibly the one week that I feel most maternal. I was so stressed up by Isaac going to school that there wasn’t a day that went by where I didn’t check, double and triple check with the Mrs on the things that we need to prepare.

There were times that I deliberately added in some stuff just to get on her nerve for rolling her eyes at me.

Me: Oh! Have we washed his uniform?

Mrs: (gave me the ‘here-we-go-again’ smile) Don’t know.

Me: Oh! We have to prepare the fruit too.

Mrs: (didn’t even bother to reply. Just continued with her ‘smile’)

Me: What about his tumbler? We need to replace this one since he can’t open or close on his own.

Mrs: (again no response. Not even a smile now. Just continued reading her magazine)

Me: (a little irritated by now) Hey! We have not even prepared his pencil case and stationery.

Mrs: (very irritated by now. Rolled her eyes) Ai yo! He doesn’t need pencil and stationery yet!

Me: (with a smug look) I know!

I can’t really blame her but at the same time it is also not really my fault. I was merely thinking out loud while driving. Plus the fact is we really have not gotten some of the stuff ready till today.

We actually got him a new tumbler some months back but we learned later that he is not able to open and close the catch on his own for it is very tight. Guess we’ll have to bring him along this weekend to pick another one.

The school requires him to bring an uncut fruit everyday and we hadn’t gotten that yet but in her defense it is probably better to buy them nearer Monday.

Besides the above there are other issues as well.

Me: How do you think they are going to manage bringing the kids up and down the stairs? Isaac will have problem because he needs to hold on to the side railings.

Mrs: (a little annoyed) I’m sure the school knows what to do.

Me: (picturing him and his classmates struggling at the stairs) Oh I know! I’m sure they will use the lift. They have to use the lift right since I’m sure many of the N1 kids will not be so good at climbing up and down the stairs yet.

Mrs: (shook her head)

The below happened last night on our way home from my parents’ place.

Me: Ani, have you washed Isaac’s uniform?

Mrs: (the same ‘smile’ again)

Ani: Yes. They’re washed.

Me: What is that smile for?

Mrs: (really trying hard not to laugh) No, I was playing with Luke that’s all.

Me: Eh?! I think he has not gotten the school socks yet right? It was out of stock right?

Ani: Yup. We do not have his socks yet.

Me: Then how?! (picturing him in his white shoes without socks)

Mrs: (irritated) Ai ya! We let him wear normal white socks for the first day lah!

Me: Oh ya, right! (silly smile)

Actually I may have inherited this behaviour from my mum or maybe I was the one who influenced her.

She knew I was trying to get Isaac accustomed to his bag by pinning the Mickey Mouse button and name tag. One day while she was showing Isaac his bag with the Mickey Mouse and trying to reinforce the idea into him, she went up to my dad as well and told to remember to pick up the right bag.

According to Ani the conversation went something like this.

Mum: Eh, you make sure you remember to pick up the right bag ya? The one with the Mickey Mouse button and name tag.

Dad: (finding it funny and annoying at the same time) Ya lah! I’m already in my 60’s so I’m sure I’ll know which bag is his ok?! Sheez.

The Mrs complained that it is only his Nursery 1 and I am behaving like this she can’t imagine what I will do when he attends Primary 1. However I have the feeling that I may not be so anxious because this is after all his very first day in a school. By the time he attends Primary 1 he would have four years or training in a school environment so I should be able to fare better.

Well let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. We’ll have to see what both Isaac and I are made of first come Monday. After that I have the twins’ first day of school to handle. Will it be double the anxiousness for me?

The student, the stand and plastic cups

2010-01-04T11:38:00.002+08:00

Many look forward to the New Year as it brings along new hope and new beginnings. For others it could mean new environment and new people in their lives. For Isaac this year will surely bring many new and exciting changes for him.

For starter he will be officially going to Nursery 1 in exactly one week’s time. Till now I am still very nervous on this behalf. I am preparing myself for his teary eyes and maybe even wails. I remembered asking a reader how did she cope sending both her daughters to school last year and she said the best thing to do is for us to simply drop them off and go for our own cuppa and be back in time to pick him up later. This is the same advice given by the Principal. She claims it is better for the child in the long run and will help him/her settle in much faster. So this is exactly what we will do. We made up our mind during the ‘meet-the-parents’ session and there is no turning back now.

People have been asking me if I have prepared Isaac for school but besides telling him I am not sure what else is there to do. I’m rather certain he does not even grasp the concept of school yet. The closest thing to school for him was the weekly enrichment class that he attended. All I can do now is perhaps to let him get used to his school bag. We were told by his form teacher to help him identify his school bag for all the kids are carrying the bags. To achieve this we have decided to add a couple of the Mickey Mouse (his favourite cartoon character for now) pin and tag on his bag.

Below are some pictures of him in his school uniform.

Yes the pants look a little to big but they are already the smallest!

Now even the shirt looks big!

Looks better sitting down, I think.

Finally a close up on his cheekyness

I really like his smile on this picture. Very natural.

I heard that it is usually harder for the fathers to let go when it comes to things like this. Is this true? The Mrs seems pretty relaxed about the whole thing so far. I believe Sunday will be a sleepless night for me.

Meanwhile the twins are making good progress of their own. They have just turned 11 months yesterday and Luke is defying all the saying about girls being faster. Up till now he is usually about a couple of weeks ahead of Hayley in terms of development.

He started to sit up first before Hayley can sit on her own a week of two later. Luke is also the first to crawl and is still crawling faster and steadier than Hayley. These days Luke is showing signs that he is ready to make his own stand, literally. He is able to stand unassisted for about 5 seconds or so. He usually helps himself up with our bed and then let go before falling on his bum. Hayley while standing assisted doesn’t look too keen on making her own stand yet.

Looking at them now we are gearing up for the chaos that they will bring once they are able to walk and run. As it is we are having a hard time caring for them alone when they decide to crawl in the opposite direction while Isaac is happily running around and climbing up and down. I do not believe anything in the world can truly prepare for what we are about to face.

I told the Mrs a couple of weeks ago that we may have to forgo eating out for the next 2 to 3 years if Isaac’s current behaviour is anything to go by. While it is easier to sit him down in the highchair when we eat, his patience will not last long.

There are usually a few things that we can do to distract him. Perhaps this might come in handy for you too.

We start off by letting him have his own cutleries and place some food on his plate and let him have his way with it. Half the times he will be succeed in feeding himself while other times we will see him spilling the food on the floor or on himself.

Once he has had enough of the food he will want to get off or will target our ice water or whatever cold drinks we have on the table. These days we have to resort to telling the waitresses not to bring us our ice water until we tell them to. Isaac has developed the habit of pouring water from one cup to another. We have resorted to bringing small plastic cups (those that the restaurants give out for ice water) out so that he can last that much longer in the highchair while we gobble down our food. The end result for his is usually Isaac wetting himself with the water in the cups.

Ideas?

2009-12-22T17:31:00.000+08:00

Wow! I can’t believe it has been almost a month since my last post. A recent chat message from the Mrs on WhatsApp (you iPhone owners will know) goes like this:

Mrs: Hey. You have not updated your blog for a month liao.

Me: I know. I’ve been so busy with the CES. I’ll see what I can squeeze out before the end of the year.

To say I have been busy in December is really an understatement. There are also times when I wanted to post about the kids’ development but by the time I gotten down to writing things have changed again and what I had in mind originally suddenly seem so yesterday.

So this time I am blogging about things that are more general. Just yesterday the Mrs commented that this year’s Christmas seems boring and asked me if I have any ideas on how to make it more interesting. Frankly speaking my feel towards Christmas has always been the same. I like the hype leading up to Christmas so this means that about a month before the actual day I will get all excited by the buying of presents and nice decorations around me. Unfortunately Christmas Day is always an anti-climax for me. All the hype will eventually lead to nothing. It will usually turn out to be another public holiday where we do nothing special.

The only exception was probably last year when (some of you might remember) we were busy with Isaac’s first birthday bash. We were so occupied with the celebration and making sure that everything is just perfect for our little man.

Last year I was also busy trying to explain to Isaac that when he sees Christmas trees and decorations up, it means his birthday is near and everyone is planning to celebrate it together with him. I don’t think he understands the concept yet at the tender age of one but this year I can definitely see progress. He definitely can recognize Christmas trees and will get all excited whenever he sees one. By the way his favourite is currently the one just outside Ion Orchard but I have not brought him to Ngee Ann City yet. He will always go ‘Wow!’ which incidentally is one of his favourite words now.

All that is left for me to do is to connect Christmas tree to his birthday and most importantly make him understand the concept of birthdays. Soon he will have to prepare a present for the Mrs. Some of you might remember a new family tradition for this Tan family and that is to have the kids prepare (too young to buy) a gift for their mum on their birthday.

This year on the other hand things have gone back to how they usually were since we have no plans to celebrate Isaac’s birthday other than a small gathering that is limited to the family and his Godma of course.

My question to you fellow parents is where and what do you do on Christmas eve and day? Besides going to church of course. While we are at it what are your usual plans for New Year’s eve and day as well?

For the young and single, they can always go to the countdown parties happening all over the island and get drunk and be merry. For the older couples who do not have to worry about their kids’ bedtime can always host their own parties at home where good friends and family can all come together for the big countdown and celebrate. That leaves the rest of us (the in-betweens). We can’t go out and get drunk for we have responsibilities at home. We can’t host a party at night for the countdown as well since most of us have our kids’ bedtime to worry about. I am really curious to know how do you, the more experience parents spend these 4 days.

Traveling is not an option now for I have 3 babies in case you forget. We won’t be traveling with them in tow at least now for another year or two. Then again traveling during this time of the year will burn a really big hole in my pocket, something I have to get used to eventually I guess.

Does parenthood mean the end of such celebrations? Is this just one of the many sacrifices that we parents are expected to make? Even if we can’t party and do the countdown then surely there must be nice family activities for the young (us parents) and the babies right?

Remember

2009-11-24T14:14:00.002+08:00

I know for a fact that many of you readers are pregnant and some of you with twins some more. I couldn’t be happier for all of you. Some are you are probably pregnant for the first time hence there are many questions and worries which is normal. While our current journey doesn’t quite apply, you are welcome to go back to the beginning of this blog to find out what we went through.

If there is one advice that I can give you besides the usual “be careful”; “rest more”; “eat healthy”; “don’t jump”; “cannot lift heavy stuffs” etc, it will definitely be “enjoy and remember every moment”. I do not believe this is something that you hear very often from women who went through the whole ordeal. At least we didn’t.

Honestly the entire pregnancy will go by very quickly. We keep hearing parents say how times fly but from our experience this feeling actually starts to apply the minute you’re pregnant. As with all things we do not feel it until the whole event is over. It is usually related more to looking back.

It really didn’t dawn on me until recently when I have readers asked me about our pregnancies. I realize then that I could not answer most of the questions. Some of the more dramatic incidents I do remember of course. Episodes such as how the Mrs was spotting for the first time and being inexperienced then we were really worried (incidentally this is one of my favourite post) and of course the time when we were so close to losing the twins. Looking at the twins now it still gives me goose bumps whenever I recall the entire terrible incident (one of the most touching post and comments page), how helpless we were and how hard the Mrs was crying.

Ok, let’s not scare you ladies. I remembered I once blogged about having positive image and not listen to all the “chickens” throughout your pregnancies (some of you readers will remember this post about chickens and eagles). Don’t let these “chickens” influence you with all their negative, sad and horrible stories about so and so and such and such. If it is not going to help with your pregnancy then tell them don’t bother to share.

What I really want to tell you is to try and remember each moment and document what you are experiencing if possible. Believe me when I tell you this; with so many things happening and so much changes to the environment and your body, you will be hard-pressed to recall in details once the dust has settled. This is exactly what we are experiencing right now. Most things just seem so …………. vague. Many a time we need to remind each other so it is a good thing that we experienced both pregnancies together.

The other good thing is of course how I managed to keep a blog and post on a weekly basis on the happenings during both pregnancies. So now when I cannot answer most of your questions I can always direct you to the earlier posts. For your sake I wish the titles are a little more precise and helpful about the topic but I have always preferred to keep it to one word to give it a sense of “huh”.

Things that I cannot remember are often related to the time scale also. So if you are looking at asking when did we do what scan and when did we do a certain test, I’m telling you now my mind draws a blank. They all seem rather close together but at the same time seem rather well spread out during the pregnancy.

I do remember something of the scans and tests of course. Details such as how long they took hence how long I had to wait to how expensive they were when we saw the bill. But if you mention the name of the test of scan to me, you might as well be speaking French to me as far as I’m concerned. That is how hopeless I am.

But by remembering I am not only referring to the name of the tests, scans, procedures and medicines. I am referring more to how you feel and experience at each stage of the journey. How much of the laksa or curry you have puked for example leaving such wonderful after taste that you will not crave for that bowl of laksa or curry perhaps till after the pregnancy. What about how many times you had to get up and drag yourself to the toilet only to find that you really need to get that 20ml of pee out of your bladder. Or the many sleepless nights that you have due to the weight and position of your child which is made worse by the solo performance (read snoring) by your husband? Who can forget the breathlessness that you experienced making every shopping trip so unforgettable? Suddenly covering Vivo City or Ngee Ann City does not seem like such a good idea after all.

Not too long ago the Mrs made a scary remark to her colleague again. She said she missed the days of being pregnant and we all know what happened the last time she said something like that. I believe she is really just trying to relieve the moment in her mind instead of missing being pregnant.

So ladies, please take my advice. Enjoy each and every stage of your pregnancy now and most importantly try and find your own way to document so you can remember in years to come. It is truly an amazing journey and experience and we all know that good things often pass us by too quickly.

Quiet

2009-11-18T12:01:00.002+08:00

It is the Mrs’s birthday today and for once the celebration has taken a back seat. It is not intentional of course but having 3 kids plus my busy schedule we have no choice but to have a quiet celebration this time. I will certainly try my best to make it up one way or another.

We do not celebrate it lavishly each year but at the very least we do go out for a nice dinner at a nicer restaurant. Up to a few years ago I would even pay attention to what she lacked or liked for months leading up to her birthday and then I would buy them and surprised her during dinner. These were limited to tech gadgets which I am definitely more familiar then her and as a result I have been rather successful during those years.

However once the idea in that department has run its course (how many cameras, laptops and handphones etc can one buy as gifts for their wives right) I reverted back to letting her pick her own presents. I have always said that she is picky when it comes to her purchases. Even today after being married for 10 years I dare not go out and buy something, be it jewelleries, handbags, shoes or clothes, as a surprise birthday present.

She is particular about colours, materials, size, shapes etc. With all these considerations I believe most guys will agree with me that it is perhaps better for her to pick what she likes and I simply foot the bill. Sure it may not be as romantic but something’s gotta give right? The idea of receiving a surprise present may be romantic but in reality I’m afraid it is often overrated and short lived, right up to the point of unwrapping the gift of course.

Fortunately and unfortunately at the same time, the price tag does not equate to whether she will like the gift or not. Take diamonds for example, most ladies certainly like them but that doesn’t mean that by splashing out 5 figures on it will guarantee the end result. While the price may cover the basics such as carat, clarity, cut, colour and certificate, the final hurdle of design is often still a gamble. The number of claws on that ring may have a direct effect of whether she leaves her own claw marks on you and also where specifically.

To those of you who are newly wed or have no kids yet, just when you think that selecting your own present is as unromantic as it gets, you will realize that you really haven’t got a clue until you add a couple of kids in the mix.

While I am still up for going out for some fine dining her heart is always with the kids. Throw in the fact that we have to trouble my parents to help care for the kids, going out and enjoying ourselves does not seem so nice all of a sudden.

With the heavy workload that both of us face, we really cherish whatever remaining time we have with the kids each evening and by the time they sleep we are mentally drained ourselves. Weekends are even more precious for these are the only 2 days each week that we actually get to spend more than a few hours with the children. We will usually go out and buy whatever we need to buy for the children so our own shopping has taken a lesser priority.

Till today the Mrs has not identified her gift yet and plus the fact that tonight is my first day of attending a course we cannot have our dinner out even if we wanted to. So this is the first time we are not celebrating her birthday.

There is one saving grace though or at least I would like to think so. I have been sending her flowers on her birthday and our wedding anniversary for the longest time despite her telling me not to and this year is no exception. While completing this post is she has already MMS me the photo of the bouquet.

A bouquet of white lilies!

Even though we are not celebrating her birthday this year I would like to state for the record that it does not mean that I do not think it is any less important. It is largely down to my own poor time management and planning but I promise I will do a much better job next year.

With the kids growing up I imagine that with each year the celebrations can only get more enjoyable and better.

Happy Birthday My Love!

No

2009-11-12T10:01:00.000+08:00

Are we made to do things backwards before we learn how to do them right? Take for example, babies will usually learn to crawl backwards before they move on to the leaping stage and finally they are able to crawl forward. The twins are now crawling all over the place and half the time they’re headed in different directions from each other. Then there is the shaking of heads before the nodding. Isaac is a classic example for he will shake his head every time we asked him something but he has since learned to nod his head when in agreement.

Now his favourite word is ‘No’. We can ask him anything or give him whatever instructions and he will either shake his head or say no.

Each morning he will knock on our door before letting himself in and we always ask him to hug us and give us a kiss and he will sing out no. I said sing because instead of the firm no his version comes in a rather softer tone, higher pitch and almost to the point of singing.

Below are some of the typical exchanges with him on a daily basis.

Us: Isaac, let’s hold hands there are cars around

Isaac: No

Us: Come Isaac, kiss daddy and mummy

Isaac: No

Us: Isaac, finish your food first

Isaac: No

Us: Isaac, call Mama

Isaac: No

Us: Isaac

Isaac: No

Ok, the last one was an exaggeration but you get the drift. Most of the time he will shake his head as well just in case his ‘no’ is not taken seriously.

The hardest thing to get him to do these days is to eat. For some reason he has decided he prefers to be on liquid diet and as a result he will reject most solid food. He has lost interest in food and will only take a few bites of it before shaking his head at our attempts to feed him more.

Sometimes he will hold the food in his mouth for minutes before spitting it out after the flavour has been sucked out. Other times he will stuff his mouth with food such as raisins, chew on them, turn them all mashy and sticky before signaling to you that he wants to spit it out. I quickly learned that when feeding him we really need to have tissues on standby for he is not big on waiting for you to get the tissue in position.

During his Sunday enrichment class he is always the first off the table and he will bring his own bowl and cup to the tub and proceed to wash his hands. Most would probably think that he is a fast eater but if they only knew he fed me most of the biscuits and raisins.

We tried feeding him everything hoping to find the one thing that will tickle his palate but we have no such luck so far. Whatever we eat he eats too other than the raw sushi and sashimi as well as the medium rare steak. We have tried spicy, sour, sweet, bitter and salty too but with no success.

Dr B our PD said that it is just a phase and to encourage him to eat more solids we should consider cutting down on his milk intake. When he is hungry then hopefully he’ll be more receptive towards whatever we feed him.

Thankfully he is showing signs of improvement lately. He seems to be more willing to try out new food and actually eat a little more also. Our fingers are crossed for him to grow out of this phase soonest possible.

The other thing that he is lagging behind is his speech. He is only saying a few single syllable words and naturally most of them are being used on him on a daily basis. Words such as ‘Wait’, 'Wet' and ‘Go’. This however does not reflect his vocabulary for he understands perfectly what we say and is able to carry out instructions meted out in both English and Cantonese.

We can see that he is already mouthing the words so it is a matter of time before the flood gate opens and then we will look back to the peace and quiet that we have now. The irony in life just continues.

Ill!!!

2009-10-26T10:39:00.002+08:00

Last week had been very hard on the Mrs. Luke came down with a fever on Monday and only recovered from it on Wednesday. During the first night his temperature reached as high as 39 degrees. Instead of sponging him the Mrs put him in the bathtub and left him soaked in there playing with some toys for 15 minutes. It worked and the temperature never reached that high again. Needless to say we had to wake up regularly to check his temperature throughout the next two nights.

The Mrs took leave the whole 3 days to take care of him. This was the first time that she had to care for a sick baby all on her own. Our kids had the usual cough and running nose here and there, now and then but never this ‘serious’.

We’re all lucky in that Isaac only really fell ill after he turned 1 and even then he was no where near half as cranky as Luke. He will just have his medication and sleep with the occasional waking up in the middle of the night crying. It was all manageable. As for Hayley she is only having the occasional running nose but that’s about it (knock on wood).

Luke refused to be put down when he was ill this time. He demanded to be carried almost all the time. Even when he was being carried he will be cranky at times too. So in order not to disturb Isaac and Hayley we sent them along with Ani to my parents’ place as usual and the Mrs stayed at home to care for Luke alone. As for me, I had to attend an international conference so I was not able to help out for all 3 days until the evenings when I'm back.

Even though Luke was sleepy he simply refused to be put down on his bed for naps. The Mrs had to carry him in her arms and let him sleep on her chest. All this while she was not able to get up and do anything. Luckily for her she had her iPhone next to her to she was able to catch up on the news, visit Facebook and serve the internet.

Coincidentally there were a number of Cantonese serial DVDs at home so she was able to catch up with those while Luke lay on her chest sleeping. She even had to skip lunch in order not to wake him up. Between going hungry and having to carry a crying and cranky baby for another few hours, the choice is obvious.

Through this experience the Mrs may have to rethink about being a stay-at-home mum. I honestly believe she now has another level of new found respect for all you SAHM. It is really not easy caring for a sick child. Some of you SAHM even have to take care of your sick child together with a healthy one all by yourself. That to me is a truly remarkable feat. I have not tried it but judging from the exhausted look on the Mrs’s face each evening I don’t think I will be too eager to volunteer my service anytime soon.

I know I have been lagging in posting new pictures of the children so here they are. I have also posted more on my Facebook photo album. Enjoy!

Frustration!!!

2009-10-16T16:39:00.000+08:00

Isaac has just completed his first term of his weekly enrichment class. I am proud to say that within the few weeks of attending he is already mimicking the Zoo-phonics action. He is able to do or at least attempt to do about 98% of the action. The only one he has not really caught on is for Umber Umbrella Bird. He even finishes with the “and we all wake up” action after Zeke Zebra.

We are reciting this with him on a daily basis not because we want him to top the class but because he truly enjoys it. He will always smile when doing the action.

These days he has even improved further by making the sounds for Catina Cat, Kayo Kangaroo and Pee Wee Penguin.

Since he is enjoying himself so much hence we thought of getting the actual Zoo-phonics material so he can try and do the matching watch the CD as well. Now comes the frustrating part.

I’m sure most of you readers know that one cannot get the Zoo-phonics training material unless you enroll your kids with the Zoo-phonics school or Growing Up Gifted. I wasn’t convinced for it does not make sense not to sell a product that you have so I called up and the answer I got was ambiguous. First the lady asked if Isaac is attending any of the 2 schools and when I said no she told me they only sell to those students who are. Then she went on to say that I may have to buy the Deluxe set but she is unable to tell me the difference in these 2 sets and also the price. All she wanted me to do was email her director and wait for him to reply. It was been weeks now and nothing.

The Mrs knows I do not take such poor service kindly so she volunteered to call and follow up instead. This time it seems they’re more apologetic and said someone will definitely call her after 2 days but it has been a further 2 days and yet still nothing.

This led me to write an email to feedback to the main Zoo-phonics office in the States. Besides expressing my frustration I am also looking if I can buy the material from either their office or anywhere else that is close to Singapore.

There are 2 things that I do not agree with here. Firstly, why should a company that developed a good and proven training material limit its use to only students of certain schools? I would think as an Educator they should look at the broader picture. I am not asking them to give it away free or sell it cheaper or even the same price. A better business model would be for us to buy it at a higher price if our kids are not enrolled in their school.

The second thing that I have issue with is who on earth runs a business and do not respond to their prospective clients’ emails, enquires and feedback? I am not sure if this Singapore office is a franchise or a distributor for the main one from the States but whichever it is I am definitely not impressed. Perhaps from my email they know that I only wanted to buy the material hence they ignore me. Maybe if I write to the same person but this time expressing my interest in enrolling my 3 kids as well as my niece in their school he might reply within a heart beat.

This whole “not selling to children who are not our students” thing is silly because in case Mr Businessman does not realize I can always borrow the flash cards from friends and family to photocopy and laminate them. I believe I can also burn a copy of the CD for Isaac. I am trying to do the proper thing here by buying original when almost the entire basic set can be duplicated and yet these people are making it so much harder. In all honesty it is really much easier and cheaper to duplicate it on my own.

Alternatively I can get my friends who are sending their kids to the “preferred” school to help me buy a set. This way it is perfectly legal and it is very simple to carry out too. Surely they can’t be this anal and refuse to sell a second set to one of their student right?

I am not sure if the email to the head office will yield any result but it is certainly a good way to vent my frustration. I will surely keep you posted on the outcome. In the meantime please buy original.

On a lighter note, below is the video of Isaac mimicking a rhyme that was taught in class. He has only did it twice and at weeks apart but it has left enough an impression. Enjoy!

10th!!

2009-10-08T13:23:00.005+08:00

How time flies and this time I am not referring to my kids growing up. I am actually talking about being married for 10 whole years!!

19th Sept 2009 marked the 10th year that the Mrs and I exchanged our vows at The Lawn at Raffles Hotel which by the way is no longer there. That’s one thing that our love has outlasted.

We marked the occasion by shopping and getting drunk in Hong Kong. This trip was not planned for this occasion actually. If we were to plan then surely we would have headed to a country further away to mark this little milestone. This Hong Kong trip was actually postponed twice. It was meant to be a little getaway last year but just before we were to depart we found out that we were pregnant with the twins. Hence we postponed it till a few months later as Dr N was not comfortable with us flying so early into the pregnancy. Not sure if you read or remembered but the Mrs had this major bleeding issue and had to be hospitalized? Well, this happened to be around the time that we were supposed to head to Hong Kong after our initial postponement. I was at a lost then with everything that was going on hence dates were really the last thing on my mind. However I was told by the airline that I have to give them a date there and then in order to activate the postponement so the Mrs just asked me to postpone it to a year later.

We were the only ones going initially but in the end my bro, Mike and his wife decided to come along. For them it was a last minute thing too and they had no idea that we will be spending our anniversary there. The Mrs doesn’t like attention hence she insisted that we just spend it like any normal day.

The last time I was in Hong Kong must have been at least 2 years ago and I noticed that they have really done well in the language department. With the influx of Chinese tourists they have brushed up their Mandarin really well. Not only do we hear the service staff speak Mandarin in retail shops, we also heard the waiters try in the eateries normally patronized by the locals. Their command of English has also improved by leaps and bounds. This, I believed is all down to practice and a funny encounter at their airport highlights this. This guy, presumably the Manager at the Popeyes Chicken & Biscuit stall insisted on replying to me in English even though I spoke to him in Cantonese. After a few exchanges I gave up and spoke to him in English. Looking back now I should have stuck to Cantonese and it would have made a very interesting conversation for those behind me.

For those of you who noticed, yes I caved! After having 3 days of nothing but Chinese food for breakfast, lunch and dinner, I really craved for other variety so when we were at the airport having our dinner, the choice was really obvious! We came back at different time and airline so imagine my surprise when I learned that Mike had the same thing too at the airport.

Although the trip was only for 4 days but it was already rather long for us. The Mrs really dislikes inconveniencing others so to leave our 3 kids with my parents was really uncomfortable for her. Especially when they are all babies and this being the first time, no one knows how they will react. Naturally phone calls were made to check on things on a daily basis (twice a day).

When we found out that all 3 babies did not sleep well the first night they were at their grandparents place, it sort of ruin the trip for the Mrs. She felt so apologetic towards my parents and Ani for they did not get much sleep at all. Thankfully they got better with the second and third nights.

The first night for us was rather interesting for upon touching down we met up with them and headed to Macau, a promise to Mike. We were there from about midnight and did not return to our hotel till about 6 the next morning. We were about S$200 poorer while my bro won around S$1,500.

The rest of the time we were just behaving like the commercial for visiting Hong Kong because we were really shopping and eating the entire trip. Every once in a while us guys will normally asked to stop and sit down for a cuppa or some light snacks or desserts.

We went to Lan Kwai Fong for some drinks on our last night. Within the 3 hours we were there my bro and I had the following:

1) 1 x Jello shot

2) A huge glass of Hoegaarden beer

3) 1 x Tequila Sunrise cocktail

4) 1 x Sex on the beach cocktail

5) 2 x Tequila Sunrise shot

6) 1 x Sex on the beach shot

7) 1 x Kamikazes shot

8) 1 x Zombie shot

9) 1 x Bourbon Coke

It had been a very long time since I had this much alcohol and thankfully I did not “merlion” and had no hangover the next morning. We managed to meet up bright and early for breakfast and then continued with our shopping before parting.

From this little experience I learned something interesting. Before departing we were just wondering which kid we will miss most and I thought I will miss Isaac the most since he is the most interactive one now. I am happy to announce that at the end of the trip we miss all 3 kids equal for their various reasons. The Mrs was watching their videos on her iPhone on the way to the airport and on the plane.

I believe it will be a few more years before we will embark on another trip without the kids. Then again it might be even longer for us to go on holiday with the kids due to the cost involved. Hahahaha

Improved!!

2009-09-14T17:03:00.004+08:00

It didn’t feel like it was that long ago when the Mrs and I were still wondering which school to send Isaac for his enrichment class. By now Isaac has already finished half the term already.

Last Sunday marked the fifth week that he was at this class and he has certainly made a lot of progress since. Although he has not really spoken yet but he is certainly enjoying the songs and story telling and his vocabulary has also increased. However I believe the area that he has most improved on is his sociability.

I remembered our Isaac was all teary-eyed when we were there for the first time for the trial class. He was so afraid that he would cling on to either of us tightly and wherever we went he would follow. He would not sit on the mat but instead on our laps. When the teachers tried to engage him he would turn to face us immediately and cry a little.

We went for another couple of trial classes before committing on this current one. When we officially started his first lesson with this school, although a little more experienced with the concept of attending a class for songs and games, he was still a little weary. He still required a little time to get used to the environment before settling down. Luckily for us we noticed that he likes a particular toy amongst all the others that were laid out before each class starts. He has always like wheels. Be it on an actual bicycle or toy cars, he likes to spin them. So happened that there is a toy truck at this school and it acted like a comfort toy for him. He will sit on our laps and spin the wheels while quietly observe the going-ons in the classroom.

I remembered he was always going for the door during the first two lessons. He would try and open it to let himself out of the class. It is with good reason why there is a little device on the door knob that will prevent any child from opening the door. The fact that it is in place probably means Isaac is not the first child that had wanted to escape and skip class. During the first two classes, Isaac will always aim for the door while waiting for the other kids to arrive.

By the 3rd class Isaac is participating more already and he smiles at the teachers more often too although he still sat pretty much close to us. He also helped with putting all the toys in the box before each class starts and when the teachers start singing “Toys away. Toys away. Time to put the toys away.”

On the 4th lesson he has decided that he is a big boy now and is probably the Master of the room for he will get up and walk to the middle of the class and smile cheekily at the teachers. When he got restless he will get up and round behind all the kids and parents in circles. Sometimes he will make the center of the mat his official resting place too for he will just lie down there and watch the teachers.

Last Sunday, his fifth class, he starts to warm up to his classmates for he will voluntarily wave at them when they arrive. In the past he always gets up to head for the exit and we have to run after him to sit him back down. These days we still have to run after him and get him to sit down but for a different reason altogether. I did not want him to be too disruptive in class by standing right in front and blocking the other kids from seeing the story books.

When the class ends while he used to be one of the first to head for the door, these days he prefers to stay behind and give his teachers the hugs, the high-fives and the blowing of kisses. He seems to really enjoy himself for he even headed back to the classrooms after I put on his shoes for him.

We are glad that he is enjoying himself so much that even though the classes are held during his usual morning nap time he has never been cranky. Oh, in case you are wondering the arrangement we have is the Mrs and I will take turn (alternate week) to be with him in class. We figured this is the best because it will allow us time to play and bond with him.

Isaac's first master piece. Opening bid at S$1,000.00. Anyone?

This piece of art was painted with real jam. Opening bid at S$500.00.

At the time of posting I only have pictures of these 2 pieces of work by Isaac. I'll be posting a couple more once I find the photos so do come back to place your bids.

Paranoid??

2009-09-02T12:38:00.002+08:00

So last Friday was an interesting one for the Mrs and I. Both of us took leave to enjoy a long weekend. She was clearing her leave while her boss was out of town but mainly it was to allow us the time to run a very important errand.

The very important errand was to visit Isaac’s nursery again for I am still not convinced that he is suitable to join them in January next year. For those of you that are new to this blog I touched on this months ago when we were deciding on which nursery to send Isaac to comes January (click here to read). Basically because Isaac is a December baby I feel that he is too young to join nursery when he supposedly turned 3 in January. Then there is also the issue of him going home in a school bus. I cannot imagine my young Isaac at the tender age of 2 having to board the school bus and come home without any known family members with him. Honestly the thought still scares me a little now. I imagine him being helpless and lost as I am typing here.

So a call was made to the school in advance to arrange just in case we miss the bus. After speaking to the person-in-charge I began to see myself as a big time paranoid parent. She actually told me that she has never had such a request from a parent before. To go down and observe how the kids finish their classes and how they will be gathered and led to the school bus. I find that hard to believe honestly. Surely I cannot be the only parent on the entire island that is not comfortable with the idea of having his 2 year old go home in the school bus without a parent around right? When told of this the Mrs naturally had a good laugh.

Upon arriving on Friday we had a little conversation with the person-in-charge again since the classes were still going on. She tried reassuring me that even if Isaac is a December baby, not potty trained and plus the fact that he is not really speaking yet he is still going to be fine in class. In fact a few of the teachers even commented that Isaac seems a little tall for his age. Although this was not the first time I have heard this remark but I still see Isaac as being about the same height as those his age.

Anyway we were told that there will be an orientation come November where the Principal will address all the new parents and we will also get to meet all the teachers. We also learned that one of us is allowed to attend the first 3 days of the class with Isaac. I guess this is to help introduce him to the new environment. Guess it will be a little like the enrichment class that we are attending with Isaac each Sunday. I will touch on that in my next post.

Not long after the kids were all dismissed from class and based on my observation I have to say they are very organized but I couldn’t help but to wonder if any child had gone “missing” before because they are all about the same size and all of them in the same uniform. These kids were led by their teachers from the classrooms holding hands all the way to the area where the parents waited patiently. No child was running around on his / her own. They were all walking along hands in hands. Naturally the Kindergarden kids were a lot noisier for they have a lot to say to their classmates before they next meet on Monday.

For those that were going home by the school buses, they were led to a room where there will be 6 queues for the 6 different buses. The teachers will accompany them there until the number is right and both the bus driver and his assistant are there to collect them. What happen next is there will be a rope with rubber rings in the middle and these kids are to hold onto the rubber rings and led out with the bus driver in front and the assistant at the other end. They will then be led down the stairs to the bus bay at the carpark where they will be helped up the bus. The assistant will make sure that they will put on their seat belts before moving off.

While everything seems to be in order and well organized I have to say the parent in me is still a little worried. I actually have this plan to secretly hide and observe how Isaac will fair being led by complete strangers to the bus on the fourth day of school. I’m sure he will cry his eyes out on the first day he has to go home on his own and I know for a fact I will be there waiting to receive him when the school bus pulls up at my dad’s place.

Having said the above I must admit that when we asked the teachers to point out the nursery 1 babies to us, all of them looked confident and independent. It seems a few of them are only 2 weeks new in the school environment. I guess it will not be as bad as I had imagine but one thing’s for sure and that is January will be more unnerving for me than Isaac I’m sure.

Punishment

2009-08-19T16:21:00.006+08:00

It might be a little too early to discuss punishment now since Isaac is only coming to 20 months old. Hence this is not really about him. What brought about this topic was an episode that we witnessed during one of our dinners at Vivo City.

Those of you who read this blog will probably know that due to the space Vivo is probably one of our favourite haunt these days. We usually like to go to the Asian Kitchen at the basement for dinner and we always reserve the table just outside the restaurant so that we have more space for the high chair and prams.

Anyway it was during one of our usual dinners there that this happened. Just when we were about done a family of 4 came and sat behind us. It was a pair of parents, a grandmother and a young girl that cannot be more than 6 or 7 years old.

When we got up to leave both Ani and I witnessed the mother pinning the girl's hand down on the table while hammering it with a tumbler. The mother hit her for about 5 or 6 times and all the while the girl was wailing. I could see that her hand was all red from the torture. I believe if the mum were to be the one at the receiving end she too will be crying let alone her poor child. Frankly I do not know what the little girl did to deserve such severe punishment but then again I do not think any child would have done anything to deserve such treatment. It was so bad that although the Mrs heard the commotion she dared not turn around to look.

Maybe some of you will feel that it is probably easy for me to blog here and criticise them but even though I am close to losing my patience with my 3 kids sometimes, I know for a fact that I will not resort to such punishment. I believe for a parent to mete out such punishment the problem will mostly lie with the adult rather than the child. Perhaps the adult need to learn some anger management.

Having said that I am actually the type that believe in "spare the rod and spoil the child" philosophy but this does not mean that I will bring a cane along wherever we go. By the way we have actually seen parents bringing canes out with them in shopping malls before. I do not believe the Western way of only grounding the child and not spanking them at all will work although I have not decided on how I’ll discipline my kids yet.

Another incident we saw was just as dramatic if not more. We were driving along Commonwealth Ave West when we saw a car stopped outside one of the main gates outside the Singapore Polytechnic. Next thing we saw was the driver, presumably the father, came out and open the rear passenger door and took out a bag, some books and other stuffs and started hurling them over the gate. There was a little girl crying and trying to stop him. Getting very concerned the Mrs asked me to go around and swing by again and if things looked to be out of hand she was all ready to call the police. When we came back there was another car stopped behind the original one and a man was seen trying to calm the driver down while the mum and the girl tried to retrieve the bag and stuffs. This man definitely needs help and I hope for his family's sake he is seeking treatment.

I heard on radio once that the Flying Dutchman does not believe in the good cop bad cop routine because both parents should be able to dish out the punishment there and then when the child misbehaved instead of having to wait till the disciplinarian comes back from work. By then the impact would not have been the same. I tend to agree with that. However at this point in time I do not think I am capable of punishing Isaac for all his naughty little habits. I can't help but smile back whenever he flashes his cheeky look. The Mrs is much better in this department. She will definitely have to be the bad cop for now.

I keep hearing about the Terrible Twos and Isaac is months away from turning two so maybe I should start getting help on the kind of punishment that a 2 year old can comprehend. These days if Isaac does not get his way he will cry and lie on the floor but thankfully he has not done so in public. Super Nanny will recommend me to identify a corner in the house as a punishment corner where the child cannot move out of for a give period of time but I honestly don't think Isaac will understand that yet.

So all you experienced parents, how do you punish your 2 year old and ensure that they understand what they are punished for at the same time?

Late!

2009-08-06T21:26:00.020+08:00

In case some of you get creative and ahead of yourselves, NO this is not what you think. It is not about that kind of “late” and we are expecting again! God, no!

I guess it is due to the way we announced our pregnancies to our close friends, always over group dinner, these days whenever we meet up for dinner and when I told them I have something to say, they will usually go “Pregnant again hah?!” The best part is they say it with such enthusiasm the people next table could have easily mistaken it as our first. Each time we will have to tell them a big ‘NO!’ and reaffirm that we are not trying already but I guess hearing it is not good enough. So here it is guys, in writing.

“We wanted 3 and we have 3 so we’re DONE!! The factory is closed!!”

Anyway back to my original post.

This is something that I wanted to blog about since before we even have the twins which makes the title even more apt.

I actually took pride that I was almost never late for anything besides work but that is a complete different thing altogether. As a matter of fact I used to be early on most occasions because I really dislike having to wait for people who practice rubber time. This was until I attended a sales seminar and the trainer said that being early is also a form of poor time management as we should be on time and not waste precious minutes waiting. Since then I always try to be on time, not too early and never late.

This all changed after we had Isaac. I am not sure if this only applies to us or maybe some of you parents share the same sentiment. Somehow after we have a child we are always late for all gatherings.

It is not like we have gotten lazier or fatter or simply cannot be bothered. We actually plan and time and make it a point to leave by a certain time so that we will not be late but sadly we fail each time.

When there was only Isaac we had to pack his bag and fill it with diapers, change of clothes, milk, water (both normal and hot), biscuits, toys, tissue, wet wipes and God knows what. Even when we had the bags packed the night before we still find ourselves rushing to clean and change him before dashing out the door to the car hoping that I can make up lost time with my driving.

Now that we have 3 kids, you can only imagine the kind of mad rush that we have to go through each time. We have told so many people that going out these days is a really big project. Whatever we had to pack for Isaac, we have to triple it now. Most of the time we have to go out with 2 bags of the kids stuffs. I have to clarify that the Mrs and Ani will usually organize things way before but it is still hard to leave at the designated time due to the children sleeping. As much as possible we try not to wake them up so most of the time we waited impatiently.

The moment they’re up, it’s different roles for each of us. We will have to take turn to change ourselves as well as change all the babies. Whoever is ready will have to carry the babies and make last minute check before we dash out of the door. On the way to the venue we will be busy texting our friends to apologise.

With 3 babies sleeping at different time of the day it is quite challenging to even go out at all. Having said that, we still managed to go out for a total of about 6 hours with all 3 babies in tow. This happened after one of Isaac’s trial enrichment class on a particular weekend. By the time we got home both adults and babies are exhausted.

I will blog about the trial classes that we have attended after Isaac has started his actual enrichment class. In the meantime below are some of the most recent pictures of our babies!

The big boy that Isaac is now!

Although big boy now but he still has his infamous cheeky smile!!

Doesn't Luke look like Isaac?

The 3 little pigs! Actually more like a pig and 2 oxes!

Notice how happy Isaac is with his siblings?

The helpers that truly adore them!

The Mrs and our babies!!!

Our first ever family portrait!

Enrichment

2009-07-21T17:30:00.009+08:00

I have always viewed ourselves as pretty relaxed parents except for a couple of things. Some will probably view us as lazy but ultimately I would like them to enjoy their childhood hence I am not too big on all the enrichment classes and flash cards etc. Honestly I prefer for them to learn at their own pace instead of us forcing it down their throats. They can only have one childhood so I would like to make it a nice one for them.

I was having lunch with my sis yesterday and she was asking me about the pictures of Isaac in my previous post. “What was he doing with the mop?” she asked. So I went on to describe to her how he is now mimicking us when we go about our business at home. Mopping the floor and putting the laundry in the washing machine are just two examples that I managed to capture with my iPhone. Off hand I can recall another incident where he actually took a piece of the tissue and climb on the sofa which is against a glass wall and started wiping the glass. According to my sis we are training him under the Montessori Method without realizing it.

It seems the Montessori Method basically involves showing him repeatedly how things are done while he observes and then he will repeat the action later on his own. This is followed by us praising and encouraging him. He is now at the age whereby he is very observant towards the things that we do. Take another example, he is always watching very closely whenever I put him in his car seat or any high chair and buckle him down. Although I believe he has an ulterior motive for he is trying to figure out how it is done so he can free himself.

After taking those pictures and video I was discussing with the Mrs that instead of him throwing his toys and make a racket at home, we should look into playing with him using house chores. Things that will still be interesting to him and he can work on his motor skill and creativity at the same time.

I have always been a skeptic of all the classes that will turn your child into a genius with exceptional memory or a linguist or the next Mozart. I believe there is about 1 out of hundreds if not thousands that will achieve such results and I think that kid is already born gifted to begin with. These schools will naturally profile on those kids that are good and deemed a success but I always wonder if anyone asks the parents of the tens or hundreds of kids that attended the same training method but yield no amazing result. Surely we must know somebody who knows somebody that sent their kids to the Glenn Doman and the Shichida classes. Maybe you can enlighten me. Do they all achieve such fantastic result? In the event that the kids turn out normal and not exceptional, what then is their excuse? That we parents are not working hard enough on them? That we are not consistent or dedicated enough? Or maybe these kids just need that couple more semesters with them.

But please don’t get me wrong for I am not against sending the young to enrichment classes. At the end of the day such classes are there to help make them better. The Mrs and I are currently looking at sending Isaac for “fun and educational” classes too (any suggestions by the way?) but our intention is not to turn him into a genius. All I want is for him to have an hour or two of fun where he can learn to socialize and learn to do something things with his hands (maybe even feet) and imagination. What we are NOT trying to achieve is to make him that much smarter than the kid next to him so that he will finish higher in class. Whatever class we decide to attend is also to provide us with a chance to bond and do things together with Isaac.

Part of our reason for sending Isaac for such once a week class is also to prepare him for the nursery comes January. We are hoping that being in such a “classroom” environment will soften the culture shock that he will surely experience when he has to attend the nursery. Some of you might remember that I had to struggle with the idea of sending him to nursery next year. To me he is still very much a baby so surely classes and schools can wait. However the Mrs convinced me that he is not attending a class per se. Instead I should think of it as sending him to play and socialize with other kids his age rather than having stay cooped up at home and not learning much. Anyway it is only for 2 hours a day so I can live with that.

Anyway I was so excited after speaking to my sis about the Montessori Method that I went over to Borders and Books Kinokuniya after work that very same day to see if I could pick up a book or two on it. Most of them are rather dry and describes the science behind the method but I am glad I managed to find one that sounds interesting and direct enough.

I am not a speed reader and plus the fact that I am so busy with so many things you will have to be patient if you want my book review and update on Isaac's progress.

Handful!!

2009-07-10T12:57:00.014+08:00

Life has been pretty nice but mundane lately. It is usually work and then rush home to be with the kids by about 6 plus and then what follows is probably the most tiring part of the day for me.
See, while the children are nice to us, they sleep by 9pm and will not need our attention till the next morning when we go to work, it can be hard handling 3 of them for that 2 hours or so.

Once we’re home after dinner at my dad’s place, Ani will be doing her chores and that leaves the 2 of us to handle the 3 of them. Although the twins are still pretty much lying around only but they can be cranky at times for they sometimes need that little nap of about half hour and with Isaac creating all the rackets they will protest violently.

Although only 2 hours but it is still pretty demanding physically or maybe it only applies to me, the out of shape father. I know, I know some of you may argue when have I ever been in shape.

Isaac is at this age whereby he knows no fear and also no boundaries. He will open all doors and drawers as well as pick up any and everything. Worst of all he will get tired of whatever is in his hands and he will drop it (read throw) like a hot brick within minutes. Hence besides looking out for his safety I also need to look after the many remote controls, handphones, digital cameras and laptops in our room.

As he is able to climb up and down from our bed now we also have to take extra care that he doesn’t slip and fall or sit on his defenseless siblings. Being the sweet big brother that he is, he will occasionally decide to show some affection towards the twins by patting them but with a little too much strength sometimes.

So during these two hours it is a lot of getting up and down and running after Isaac. Whenever the twins are cooperative we will be able to sit down and read with Isaac or watch some educational kids’ videos on YouTube. This will keep his butt planted for a while.

Sometimes, thankfully this doesn’t happen often, both twins want to be fed around the same time and it will be impossible for us to watch after Isaac so Ani will be called in to watch over him for a while.

Once the twins are fed, they will normally sleep soon after and then it will be Isaac’s turn to be fed and tugged in bed. Nowadays with the twins sleeping early the Mrs has the chance to coax him to sleep. I believe this is the time of the day that she looks forward to the most. I know she really appreciates the opportunity to have this little quiet and bonding time with Isaac.

Now if the way Isaac behaves is a preview of what we are to expect from the twins then I am worried. Friends have been pretty generous with their compliments on how well we are coping with the 3 of them now but I like to remind them that the hardest is yet to come. I truly believe that it will be much harder once they are about Isaac’s age now.

While I am bracing myself for that inevitable I am also secretly wishing that by then Isaac will be old enough to understand things and reason with. Wishful thinking? I don’t know, you experienced mothers tell me.

Right now we are enjoying whatever ‘me’ and ‘us’ time that the children have generous granted us. With all of them asleep by 9 plus we do have some time to do our own readings or finishing the serial that we like, in my case True Blood. Oh did I mention that all these were done in the comfort of our own bedroom and on our bed? The twins have no issues (knock on wood) with us switching on the lights and TV once they are sound asleep.

We can even squeeze in a night of Mahjong with the two of us playing at the same time, although this is only done occasionally. All we need to do is set up the trusted baby monitor and be on high alert but so far (knock on wood again) they can still sleep through the night. Lucky us? I definitely think so!

I know many of you readers miss Isaac so below are some of the latest pictures and a video of him helping out at home.

From the video you can see that Isaac was really struggling whether to wash the clothes or not. I think part of the reason besides the weather is the load.

When Isaac is not busy with the laundry he likes to keep the floor clean so that he and in the near future his siblings can crawl around safely.

Smile!!

2009-06-26T17:16:00.008+08:00

The twins are at the stage where they know how to smile already and sometimes if we are lucky we might just catch them chuckle too. This is a little hard to achieve for we need them to be in the right mood.

The babies' smile is really something that is very heartwarming. No matter how tired we are after a hard day’s work their smile will somehow take it all away. So what we do these days is to pop our face close to theirs and then call them by their names with an animated tone of voice of course and they will give you that sweetest smile. With Hayley I always call “Baby Hayley! Hayley Baby!” whereas nothing much rhymes with Luke so it is just “Luke Luke!” Pronounced as “look look”. Although simple but it works just as well on him.

Besides evenings, their smile will also brighten our day when they flash it at us first thing in the morning. It is a very nice thing to see them stretch themselves, yawn and then when they see you they’ll flash that toothless smile. It is mornings like these that make me want to skip work and spend more time with them. No wait…….. that could be my lazy bug actually.

For whatever reason I seemed to be more successful in getting the twins to chuckle and coo with me. Sometimes I will change them after their night feed and while they are lying on the changing table I will make funny faces and play with them. This will sometimes lead to them chuckling. The Mrs while feeding the other twin will stretch her neck out to see what is going on and how I managed to do that.

Just the other day she was wondering aloud why is it that I can get them to chuckle while she can’t. She concluded that it could be due to the fact that she is more concerned about how much milk they are taking whereas I am happy just feeding and playing with them. Typical man? Perhaps.

From my observation there seems to be this jealousy / competition thing going on between parents. Things such as which parent the child will learn to call first or who will the child run to first when both parents come home together. This is happening to friends and family around us hence I believe this applies to you all too. I’m sure it is all done in good humor. For your information we sometimes do this with Dino too.

Honestly I may tease the Mrs a little here and there whenever I succeeded in making the babies laugh or do something different but I really will have no issue if she can get the babies to do stuffs that I can’t or even if they learn to address her first. Take for example she taught Isaac to point to his own head whenever we ask “Who is the bad boy?” and also shakes his head whenever we ask “Is Isaac a handsome boy?” What she taught him is still providing us with hours of fun which is the key thing here hence it is not really important who taught him that. If only he is more consistent and not get distracted so easily I’m sure more people will get to experience and enjoy it.

Speaking of Isaac he is still having that infamous cheeky smile of his and in fact he is getting more mischievous although he is still a good boy most of the time. It is just that it is getting harder to bring him along whenever we meet friends for lunch or dinner. He just wouldn’t sit still for long. In the past we are able to pacify him with food but these days this method will not last long. Before you know it he wants to be off the baby chair and move about on his own. As a result if we have to bring the kids out with us then more often than not we will bring the twins instead of Isaac.

I guess we will just have to wait for him to turn older and maybe can reason better and then it will be the twins’ turn to stay at home while we bring Isaac out for meetings with friends.

In case reading this post does not bring that smile to your face then I have the following video that might just do the trick.

Needs??

2009-06-15T16:15:00.003+08:00

It is the exciting time of the year again. The Great Singapore Sale!! Not sure if you all noticed but the commencement of this sales period seems to be getting earlier with each year. Some shops are even offering pre-GSS sale.

Anyway the Mrs seems to be quite excited this year now that she has 3 babies to fill those clothes with. What’s even more exciting for her is this year we have a baby girl to doll up.

Babies aside this is usually the time when the Mrs looks around for a bargain on some of the designers bags that she has been eyeing for some time. Credit to her for she has no problem waiting for such sales before committing on the bags and wallets. I definitely cannot say the same about me. I am the typically impatient male where I will not even wait for another day if it means a saving of 10% by borrowing a membership card from friends. I’ll usually look at the price and deduced that the saving of 10% is not worth the wait so more often than not I will end up paying for the retail price.

Anyway the Mrs already proclaimed that she is on the prowl for 2 designer bags which she intends to use for work. She has already gotten one from TOD’s and she is still on the lookout for a second one although not too wholeheartedly. This is the ‘problem’ with her because once she has spent a certain amount of money it is harder for her to commit on another item. Knowing her character I will usually be more encouraging whenever she wants to buy anything.

I was having this conversation with my bro, Mike the other day that the same usually cannot be said for the wives. Case in point, I have always wanted to buy a home theater system but due to the lack of wireless speakers I have been putting it on hold. That was until recently when I came across a promotion on a Panasonic one which includes a Blu-ray player. There was an almost 37% discount and I was getting really excited but the Mrs’s response was “Do we really need it? You seldom watch your movies in the living room anyway.” To be fair to her she was pointing out the truth but I imagine that scenario will be easily changed once I get my hands on the system.

Back to the conversation with Mike;

Mike: How? Are you buying the Panasonic system?

Me: The Mrs asks if we really need it leh. She commented that I hardly watch TV in the living as it is.

Mike: Ya but that is because you don’t have the system there mah.

Me: Somehow we husbands are more supportive when it comes to encouraging them to buy whatever they want.

Mike: Ya but we are so supportive because we hope that they will in turn be just as supportive when it comes to our purchases.

Me: Imagine if we ask them do they really need those new bags, shoes or wallets.

Mike: Ohhhhh…. Bro, you don’t want to go down that road!

Both: Hahahahahaha

Mike is experiencing pretty much the same thing with his intention to purchase. He was using the buying of more camera lens for his new hobby and DSL as an example and he knows for a fact that Kat, his wife will definitely ask does he need so many lenses.

The four of us were out having lunch and shopping when I told the Mrs that most of us buy stuffs base on our wants and only a small percentage of our purchases are really based on our needs.

Speaking of lunch I learned another thing about wives and purchases. I commented the other day that actually I was hoping to buy us both a new pair of wedding bands so we were looking around and I told her that I actually like the Bvlgari classic B.Zero1 ring for sometime now so if it looks good on us both then we will buy them. We went ahead to try but it looks better on me than her so we did not purchase them.

She encourages me to buy it for myself first while we continue to source for another ring for her. The strange thing here is it actually costs more than the home theater system that I wanted to buy. Then I came to the conclusion that maybe with the system we are not speaking the same language but with jewellery she understands my want much better!

If you think this post is about our voicing our dissatisfaction towards our wives then nothing is further from the truth. At the end of the day our wives will not really say no to our needs and wants since they know how hard we work and they understand that sometimes even guys just want to pamper ourselves a little. I believe in every marriage they are there to be our check and balance and we all love them for that.

Now Honey can I buy the home theater system and the ring?

Courageous?

2009-06-02T13:12:00.003+08:00

Wow!!! Has it been more than 2 weeks since I last posted here?!?! How time flies especially when you have 3 kids and work as well as other stuffs that you have to work on. I know my bro has always been reminding me whenever he meets me that my blog needs updating but it never quite occurred to me that it has been this long.

Besides the usual excuse of being busy I guess there is nothing much worth updating from the Tan family. Everything has been pretty much same-o same-o and mundane.

As parents I believe the Mrs and I are pretty relaxed and courageous (some say stupid) at the same time. Most people would have agreed when they see that we tried conceiving so soon after Isaac but I have different thing in mind.

About 2 weeks back when the twins turned 3.5 months we brought them to Dr B for their routine check up. She has always been the rather relaxed doctor and the instructions she gave was for us to bring the twins to her when they are 3 or 4 months old.

Hmmmm…. Now which should it be? 3 months old or 4 months old? Finally I decided to bring them in when they’re 3.5 months old. Typical of a dad right? That was an easy enough decision.

So on that fateful day both the Mrs and I took childcare leaves and the Tan family headed to Dr B’s clinic. Isaac and Ani came along of course. Isaac was due for his 15th month checkup and we were already late for that. Blame it on the government (typical of a Singaporean right?) for not giving us 6 days of childcare leave for each kid. As a result we have to time their visits to the doctor to be on the same day.

Bringing all the children to the PD for their routine checkup at the same time is all good and fine but what we forgot was Isaac was also due for his jabs. Now don’t ask me what he had because if there is one thing I am not following, it is the injections. I have totally lost track of what he had and will be having. I normally leave it to the good PD and the ever reliable record book.

Anyway imagine my surprise when I learnt that besides the twins Isaac needs to be jabbed too. While the twins were required to have their 6 in 1 jabs, their big brother needed 3 jabs!!! Dr B said that there were 3 outstanding jabs for Isaac but she would only recommend that he takes 2 of them that day leaving the 3rd one till when he comes back in another few months time. The best part was the silly old me was thinking “Sure! What is a 2 in 1 jab when the twins are having 6 in 1 right? I mean come on, while we’re at it why not give him all 3 in 1 and get it over and done with?”

When things were finally explained to me and after I had my blonde moment I actually looked at Isaac and felt sorry for him. I wondered if he will be traumatized by this episode considering some adults already have problem with handling a single jab to the arm let alone 2?!?!?!

The next wave of awakening hit me and I suddenly realized that with all 3 kids are getting their jabs on the same day, we will really have a handful should all of them develop fever. We were smart enough to always arrange for the jabs to take place on a Friday so that we have the weekend to take care of the kids but no weekend is long enough should all 3 of them develop fever!!

Being the relaxed and courageous (again some say stupid) parents that we are we went ahead with all jabs for all kids.

First up was Isaac and being the big brother that he is he showed his younger siblings how it should be done. I was wondering how were they going to administer both injections because Isaac will probably reject the second one right? The answer became clear when I saw Dr B and a nurse holding one syringe each. One of them aiming for Isaac’s arm whiles the other the thigh. They synchronized it to perfection (in my opinion definitely a gold medal is due) and all we heard from Isaac was “erh!” and then Dr B quickly shoved a toy in his hands and he went off playing! He took it like a real man there! I couldn't have done better myself. Really!

Luke faired better than Isaac when he had his 6 in 1 because he did not cry at all but Hayley being the girl in the family and the manja one cried a lot more but she too forgot about the pain in a couple of minutes.

For the rest of the weekend we were very vigilant, patrolling their rooms armed with our trusted Cadi thermometer.

Maybe the kids know that their parents are inexperience and courageous (some say stupid) they decided to be kind on us for they did not have any side effects of any kind. Either that or they took pity on us for the damage to us were probably more severe than them as the bill came up to about S$700 for that day.

After this experience will we have all 3 kids take their injections on the same day? ABSOLUTELY!!

Switched

2009-05-14T13:27:00.007+08:00

I read with interest an article published in the Today newspaper today about how a pair of girls were switched at birth in the hospital and had led their separate and happy lives for 56 years. They have only just discovered the truth.

This is nothing new of course as I have read a couple of such stories before but it always brings to my mind a burning question. What if Isaac was switched at birth too?

Note: The following is only a hypothetical question that I played around in my mind. There is no evidence to suggest that I should be concerned or should think otherwise. I am only using Isaac as an example and this is just something that I am curious to know how will parents react in general.

I had wanted to do a post on this topic but never quite gotten down to doing it so today's article is a timely reminder especially when I am running out of things to post about.

I remembered asking the Mrs when Isaac was only a few months old what will she do if the hospital rang one day to inform us of their mistake. What if Isaac actually belongs to someone else and our baby had been raised by another couple for the past few months?

The Mrs brushed my question aside can called me ‘Seow’ (mad in hokkien) for bringing up this ridiculous question. I suspect deep down she did not know what her own answer might be hence the easiest thing to do is to brush me and my nonsense aside.

Honestly till today I am still pondering and trying to find my own answer. What do I do? Do I return Isaac and welcome my own boy with open arms? Do I tell the other couple that let’s just continue raising each other’s boy and continue to keep in touch to witness the growth and progress of our own boys? Will the other party even contemplate such a bizarre request?

I hope you realize that as the days go by the answer to my lingering question is harder to answer. As we spend more time with Isaac it will be harder to let him return to his rightful parents for sure. Looking at the flip side does this also mean that the decision should be easier? Since it is so hard to say goodbye then surely it will be easier to just continue with this mistake right?

This would be the case if we take our own child out of the equation. We are only looking at it from keeping Isaac point of view. Surely this will not be so easy if you know that your own flesh and blood is still out there raise by another couple. It will most probably be made worse if you get to see your actual child. Will you then be able to tell yourself to continue with this mistake and prey and hope that the other party continues to take excellent care of your child?

Honestly as of today I am still at a lost as to what will I do so I am curious to know how will you, fellow parents react. What will you do? Do you know of something similar happening to people around you? It certainly is an interesting topic to think about isn’t it? But please do not spend too much time dwelling on it and definitely do not scare your spouse into thinking you know something that they don’t and as a result causing a family panic.

The only thing I know for sure is I will sue the hospital till the cow comes home!!

Let’s just treat this as something that we toy around and scare ourselves with for surely this cannot happen right?

Then again try telling the 56 year old ladies that……..

Progress

2009-05-08T10:53:00.020+08:00

As much as I like to keep you all posted on the progress of the twins and Isaac I have been rather tied up with work plus life is getting a little mundane hence nothing interesting to write about.

The most exciting thing is Isaac finally walking. This happened about one and a half weeks ago. All along he was showing signs that he will be walking soon but he just did not take that 1st step. He always chose to go back down on his fours and crawl. One Tuesday after work when we got to my parents' place we saw him standing and walking rather unsteadily. Since then he has been walking around non stop and he has improved a lot within a week and he is walking pretty fast now. Most will comment that he is a little slow since he was about 16 months old when he walked but we're not concerned.

Another very good development is that the twins are finally joining the STC. For the past few nights both of them have been absolute angels. Having their last feed at about 9pm and going off to sleep usually between 10 and 11 plus. They will normally wake up at about 6 plus for their breakfast. Last night was amazing. Luke had his feed at 8 plus slept at 9 plus and did not wake up till we had to send him to his grandpa's at about 8am. It sure looks like they are very much like Isaac in this sense. The downside of course is they are not drinking as much milk as they should be but according to the PD so long as they are still gaining the right amount of weight then it is fine.

Speaking of weight gain, the twins seemed to be doing better than expected especially for Luke as you can tell from the picture below. The rule of the thumb is twice the birth weight by 6 months and about three times by the time they turn 12 months. As of now Luke is already about 5.8kg and Hayley at about 5kg with their birth weight at 2.4kg and 1.9kg respectively. It sure looks like the twins have caught up quite a bit.

Luke being the stronger one is able to flip himself now. In fact he fell off his mattress 2 nights ago. Luckily their bed is only a thick mattress on the floor so no damage was done. Looking back now it is a little funny because when we heard him cry the Mrs walked to the mattress but could not see him on it. She was shocked and asked where he was. Before I could switch on the lights the Mrs found him lying on the floor. Luckily she did not step on him.

As I had mentioned in my last post Luke likes to sleep on his tummy and because of this he has developed the strength to lift his head and hold it for a few seconds. These days his legs and body are also stronger he is able to push with his leg and twist his body and as a result he will be lying face up. Between the two of them Luke is the one that covers most of the bed when he sleeps. He will actually crawl and rotate as he sleeps so we will always find him in a different position and facing each morning. Sometimes at night Hayley will complain when Luke invade her territory with one of his limb touching her. One would think that they would have gotten used to sleeping and banging against each other by now right?

Anyway back to our mundane life. Each day it is really just work and rush home to be with the kids. Have dinner at my parents' place before we head home. Usually it is this time at home that is the most tiring. Ani has to do the house work so it is down to the Mrs and I to watch over the 3 of them. If the twins are sleeping quietly then it is no problem but this is almost never the case because Isaac being in the same room will cause too much racket that it will be impossible for the twins to sleep. We even tried putting the twins in a separate room but to no avail.

So somehow we managed to pacify the twins and at the same time keep Isaac occupied until Ani is done with her work. She will then feed Isaac and put him to sleep by 9 plus. Now that the twins are sleeping earlier it also means more free time for us. Soon I will be able to go onto MSN and Facebook at night so look out for me ya?

I know I owe it to many of you so here are some of the latest pictures of the twins and Isaac.

So can you tell if I'm Hayley or Luke?

With my picture you can tell for sure right?

See how happy Isaac is with his siblings?

"What do you think they're up to now?"

"Now I'm certain no one will mistaken me as a boy anymore!"

"HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!"

Pink!!

2009-04-28T11:51:00.007+08:00

I remembered a couple of months ago when I had dim sum with my bro, Mike and our wives, a waitress asked if Kaitlin (their daughter) is a boy or a girl. While they politely told her that she is in fact a girl, Mike was a little "upset" once she walked away. He asked why is it that people can't tell especially when Kaitlin is dressed in pink from head to toe and sitting in a pink pram.

I laughed it off then and told him that it is normal because with some babies you really can't tell especially when they are younger. I related to him the many occasions that we were asked if Isaac is a boy or a girl when he was younger even though he was dressed in shorts with polo shirts or shirts.

There is a Chinese saying that you wont know the pain until you have pricked by the needle yourself. Well I guessed I was pricked by the needle and I should apologise to my bro for dismissing it as a small deal when in fact it is anything but!!

About 2 weeks ago while we were out having high tea with Mike and our wives, a waitress looked at the twins in their stroller and asked are they both boys. While the Mrs clarifies with her politely, I was thinking can it be anymore obvious? I mean one of them is in blue while the other in pink so you should be able to tell right away right?

What do you think? Does she still look like a boy in all pink? You be the judge.

Speaking of pink, the Mrs is going on a rampage buying anything that is nice and in pink. She has caught on the online shopping craze and the mothers at SMH is not helping also. I have to admit many of the stuffs that they put up for sale are very nice indeed. Most importantly they are very cheap too! Now before you go on and accuse us of showing favouritism towards Hayley, you should know that she buys things for Luke as well.

I think the twins may be taller than Isaac because they are in this in-between stage now where Isaac's old rompers and pajamas at the same stage are a little small for them while those at the next stage are too big. As a result we went out and bought about 6 to 8 new pajamas from Gap for them. We felt their growth should not be restricted by the length of the clothes they wear. Luckily there was a 30% discount so the damage was under control.

Not sure about the height but there are surely distinctive differences between all 3 of them. Hayley has the nicest and longest eye lashes and did I mention it curled upwards? Isaac's eyelashes are nice and long for a boy as well whereas Luke doesn't seem to have any. They are just too short.

Luke is round like Isaac was at about the same stage and he weighs in at about 5kg now. Not bad right considering he is about a month premature and he has not even hit 3 months yet. Hayley on the other hand is still lagging behind but we're not exactly complaining yet until our next visit to their PD.

When it comes to drinking habits (not referring to beer here in case you AA members are mistaken) the 3 of them are rather unique in their own way as well. Isaac was the best as he did not give us any problem and he drinks very fast. Even now he finishes 270ml of milk in under 5 minutes. He likes to drink plain water as well. Luke on the other hand was a messy drinker when younger. He will occasionally squirt out milk from the corner of his mouth. Milk will also flow out from both corners of his mouth. However he has since learnt his manners and is much neater and cleaner now. His speed while not as fast as Isaac but he has shown a glimpse of the same potential as his big brother. Hayley is a typical girly girl. She will take her time with her meals and do not like to be disturbed. When you are feeding her she will really much prefer if you give her your full concentration and not talk to anyone. Otherwise she will let you know exactly how she feels. It could be due her speed because she is extremely clean. If we were to tug a piece of tissue under her neck it will come out completely dry after her feed.

The only other thing we can compare is probably their sleeping habit. I do not think we can attain a fair comparison because Isaac may appear to be the easier one but then again he did not have a sibling making noise and waking him up all the time. Luke is probably the clear winner in this category because he simply loves to sleep. He goes to sleep very easily after each feed and up until recently he will wake up like clockwork every 3 hours demanding to be fed again. Hayley on the other hand takes a lot of swaying and carrying before she will doze off but the good thing here is her sleep usually lasts much longer. Some of you may have noticed from my Facebook message that Hayley managed to sleep throughout when she turned 2 months old. While this is not 100% of the time but it is at least a good 80%.

For the past few days Luke is showing signs of joining Hayley in the STC - Sleep Throughout Club. The night before he slept after his feed at about 10 ish and only woke up around 6 the next morning. Last night both of them slept from about 11 plus and woke up this morning at about 6 ish for their milk. It certainly looks like they might just join Isaac who became a member of the STC on a permanent basis from when he was 3 months old.

One concern that we have is Luke generally likes to sleep on his tummy. The past few nights of him sleeping throughout, he was on his tummy. Earlier we were worried so he was put on his tummy only for short spells and under regulation supervisions but recently he has grown so much stronger that he can lift his head up and turn it from left to right so we feel a little safer. He likes to crawl forward while sleeping too so we are sacrificing our pillows to pad the surroundings. If this is anything to go by he will be crawling in no time.

Disadvantage?

2009-04-14T11:04:00.003+08:00

Some of you may remember that Isaac was our Christmas present when he came to this world on 26th Dec 2007. Being born so late at the end of the year makes him much smaller in size when compared to his peers born in the same year.

Take his cousin for example. Chad was born in January so he is almost a year older than Isaac and one could never have guessed they are of the same age just from looking at their sizes. However size is not really the issue here cause given time Isaac can surely catch up. It is only prominent now when they are this young.

What concerned me most is the disadvantage in terms of time given to him for his development. Honestly I never thought much of it until last week when the Mrs brought (more like dragged) me along for her nursery (as in school) shopping.

Most if not all the nurseries are already taking in students who were born in 2007. My initial reaction was nonchalant because to me Isaac is still very much a baby so the idea of sending him to Nursery 1 class seems so distant.

This trip to a very popular nursery really woke me up! It was in the administrator’s office that I realized that Issac is due to go for Nursery 1 next January!!! My baby is going to school (ok, a little drama here since it is not really school school but you know what I mean) next year!! Picturing him in his little school uniform brings a smile to my face because he will look so cute! At the same time I have this sour feeling deep inside also because it sort of mark his growing up.

While touring the school and their many facilities, we saw students in the current Nursery 1 classes walking down the corridor hand in hand. They are of various shapes and sizes but all of them look so cute in their uniforms. We could tell that some were born in the beginning of the year while others at the end. I can already visualize Isaac being bullied by the big fat kid who was born in January.

When it finally dawned on me that Isaac will be big enough to go to Nursery 1 next year I suddenly got confused. I always thought that we will be sending him to play school first before nursery but in this case it does not quite add up.

Later I realized it was due to the fact that Isaac was born in December. As far as I know typically the Play Schools will take in children when they turn 18 to 20 months old. I always wanted to put off sending him to school, Play School or otherwise, until he turns 24 months but I just realized that by the time he turns 24 months, he is also 3 years old and can be enrolled into nursery 1.

Confused? Let me explain. We look at the actual month that Isaac is born so he will turn 24 months end of this year but according to the government Isaac is 3 by January so he can go for his Nursery 1 class already. This means he will be attending nursery when he is really just 24 months and 2 weeks old.

Now it suddenly looks like Isaac will miss attending Play School unless of course we enroll him when he turns 18 months instead of the original 24 months. He will get a taste of Play School for 4 to 6 months before being promoted to Nursery 1.

Not too long ago I have a friend who warned me that children born at the end of the year may be a little slower in terms of absorbing what is taught in school. He would know since 2 of his 3 children are born in December. It seems their academic results are not that ideal. I believe this may be true to a certain extend especially when they are younger.

To think I was originally hoping that Isaac could wait till 1st January before coming to this world and I will enroll him together with those born ‘a year’ before him. This way I thought I could save him a year in his life. Now I understand why when shared with Dr N, he too felt that it was not such a good idea after all.

Of course if the Mrs is a SAHM then maybe we can consider skipping Play School all the way up to Kindergarden and let her play and educate him herself. But for now it looks like we will just have to see if he is able to fend off the big bully on his own.

Record!!

2009-04-08T11:54:00.001+08:00

I told myself I must try to make it a point to blog at least once a week and so far I was able to stick to it but that was until last week! Not sure if any of you noticed but there was no update from me.

Oh before I go into this week’s topic I need to clarify one thing. A few of your readers expressed your concerns after seeing the picture from my last post featuring Ani carrying all 3 babies. I believe it is in my best interest to clear the air before Ministry of Manpower comes knocking on my door.

The only reason Ani was carrying all 3 babies was because she requested to take a picture with all of them so she can show her family back home. She was the one who wanted to take a picture with her carrying all of them. Under no other circumstances will she be asked to repeat that stunt especially in a normal working environment. When the picture was taken it was in a controlled environment and extreme care and preventive measures were taken to ensure the safety of not only the babies but Ani too. Please do not try this at home and definitely not when you have to borrow someone else's kids for the stunt.

I remembered some tourists were giving us a funny look when we were handing all 3 babies to Ani. One even offered to take the picture for us probably thinking that he is saving Ani.

Anyway since the last outing to Carousel and Isetan Scotts we have gotten a little more used to the attention. I am happy to say that we are still going out on a weekly basis with all the kids in tow and the twin stroller of course.

We actually went to Gymboree last weekend for Isaac to have some fun climbing and crawling around and learn to interact with other children. We went for a trial lesson once but decided that he is not ready to be following the group in their activities. Most of the time he just sat there and observed what the older kids were doing with the facilitator. He only managed to warm up his engine after about half an hour before he started to crawl around chased after the balls. He had such a good time that he did not want to leave when the hour was up. Since they do offer playtime where kids can just go into the gym and do their own things we decided Isaac is probably happier that way hence we headed back there last Saturday. Ani, the Mrs and I took turn rotating between playing with Isaac and standing outside handling the twins, stares and questions from the other parents, grandparents and maids there.

Speaking of last Saturday we set a record for the longest number of hours out with the entire family minus Dino. We were out for a total of just under 8 hours and only returned home after 9pm. The best part was we were not even bothered with the fact that we had to lug along this huge diaper bag that contains milk, water, diapers, snacks, toys and change of clothes for all 3 babies and the twin stroller. Although the twins were cranky at times demanding to be fed but we were mostly unfazed. We just went about our business as if we were the only ones at the mall not paying much attention to all the stares and smiles.

We were even bold enough to take on a steamboat buffet dinner in the evening. Although the spread and food was nothing to rave about but we still managed to enjoy ourselves and dinner lasted for close to 2 hours. During dinner we had to stop and feed the twins and pacify Isaac as well.

After dinner we still had energy to carry on shopping at Gap for a bit more where we managed to buy some clothes for Isaac and another bag for the Mrs which she felt is good for another diaper bag. I found something I like too but that is for another day.

Overall I am very pleased with the whole experience although I had to miss my Spurs playing live on TV. They lost 2 - 1 incidentally if anyone is interested. This little experience will hopefully go a long way to reinforce into the Mrs's mind that even though we have 3 babies now but with a little bit of planning we can still enjoy our weekend outside as a family. Who says we have to stay cooped up at home now that we are parents of 3 babies?

Awkward!!

2009-03-27T14:29:00.023+08:00

Last Sunday we took Ani out for a high-tea buffet to celebrate her birthday. Since she really like salmon sashimi and the Mrs has always like the spread at Carousel, we decided to buy her lunch there.

The original plan was to leave Isaac at my dad's place in order to allow Ani time and space to enjoy her birthday treat. With Isaac around he will surely be a handful and we felt that Ani may not be able to enjoy as much. However Ani was a little sad when she learned of our plan so we decided to bring Isaac along.

Is this cone too hard or I do not have enough teeth?

On that day it was also the first time that we used the twin stroller that my SIL had bought us all the way from Canada. She is a citizen there and when she learned that we were having twins she immediately told us that she will get a twin stroller for us as a gift. She had to lug it all the way from Canada as well when she came over to visit during the Chinese New Year.

She would be pleased to know that the stroller was a breeze to handle and it is also not that heavy. Like most twin strollers it is rather bulky and would have problem fitting into our old car. But with this new 7 seater we had no such problem although we had to give up the last row of seats. From our trip that day we also concluded that in fact there are a number of escalators that will not be able to take our stroller.

Overall lunch was good and we all enjoyed ourselves even though Isaac was a little cranky. He was not feeling well as he had probably caught the virus from his cousin. He was always demanding to be carried or fed so as usual the 3 of us had to take turn to carry and pacify him. Before we knew it almost 2 hours had passed and we had to leave as the restaurant prepared itself for the dinner buffet.

She just can't bear to celebrate without Isaac

Who says caring for 3 kids is easy?!?!!?

The Mrs and Ani caring for 3 of them like how they do on a daily basis.

Now those of you who had followed this blog since day one will probably remember that I had for the longest time chosen not to reveal our identities because the Mrs has always been afraid of unwanted attentions. Imagine her shock and uneasiness when we wheeled out the twins in their new stroller for the first time. People were staring at us and for the most part smiling. She was so uncomfortable from the short walk between Shaw House where we parked our car to the Royal Plaza on Scotts. I could tell that she was evading eye contact with the strangers who were walking in our direction.

As all the 3 babies needed to have their diapers changed we decided to head towards Isetan Scotts since they have one of the better nursery around.

On the way back to Shaw House the Mrs again felt very awkward and had to always engage me in conversation in order to avoid making eye contact with oncoming strangers. I also suggested for her to wear her shades the next time we bring the twins out in their stroller.

The observations we made was rather interesting because this is not the first time we brought all the 3 babies out but we have always had the Mrs and Ani sling the twins while I carry Isaac. Although there were stares but they were never quite like what we had experienced with the stroller. Immediately upon crossing Claymore Hill road we were stopped by 2 Chinese ladies. They asked if they were twins and requested to take a picture of them. While I was replying them the Mrs had already walked on.

I should have read that as a sign that she will not be of any help from what is to come next!

There were no further incidents and we reached the nursery at Isetan Scotts rather quickly using the lift of course. Even though the very long escalator looked like it could handle the stroller I was not confident I could manage getting the stroller on and off the escalator. I told Ani I will have a trial run another day without the twins actually in there of course.

Nothing much happened in the nursery except for some pleasant exchange with another 2 ladies there who were feeding this little boy.

Once we were done they Mrs and Ani wanted to pick some stuffs up for the babies department and since the stroller is too big to be manoeuvred between the aisle and rows of products I decided to park myself with the twins right next to where they display the prams and strollers.

Our twin stroller!!

What happened next was something that even I had difficulty handling. The twins in their stroller literally stopped traffic. Everyone that walked down that aisle would stopped and check if they were twins and their genders and age before proceeding to guess which is the boy and which is the girl. Those who were with their family and chanced upon us first will guessed and then once their family members caught up they will made them guess the gender as well. If only I get a dollar with each guess..........

Most people are excited to learn that they are of different genders.

The Isetan employees and promoters also left their post just to come and sneak a peek. Some even got their colleagues from another section to come and look and again guess the gender.

There was this Caucasian man who became a father himself 5 days back showed me the pictures of his daughter in his phone and asked to take pictures of the twins at the same time. Basically I spoke with men and women of different colour, age, shape and size.

Can you tell who is Luke and who is Hayley?

All this while the Mrs and Ani along with Isaac were at a distance away watching and sniggering away. I could tell from the look on the Mrs's face that she was REALLY glad she was not the one who had to wait with the twins. Think she will probably dig a hole and bury her head in.

After what seemed like an eternity these people finally moved on and before more came down this aisle I quickly moved away with the twins and join up with the Mrs.

If I didn't know any better I would have thought mine are the last children on earth, think Children of Men. The way these people reacted was nice but a tad too overwhelming. While I am fine with strangers staring and smiling away and asking the odd question or two, this experience with the crowd was a little too weird.

Although this little experience did nothing to deter me from bringing the stroller out again I know for a fact that it will take a lot more now for the Mrs to agree to handle the stroller alone with the twins in it.

Revenge!!

2009-03-20T16:51:00.010+08:00

When we first found out we were having twins there were many people including a few readers from here who said we were lucky and how they wish they have twins as well. My reply to them then was to give us a few months and let me blog about my experience first before you wish for it.

Well here is an update for you twins seekers after having ours home for a little over a month.

I believe the hardest part of having twins is really the sleep deprivation. When we had Isaac, although he was usually cranky between 9pm till about midnight or 1am it was still very much manageable. There were 2 of us and only 1 of him so we could always take turn to care for and pacify him.

With the twins now we sort of have our own designated baby to care for throughout the night. Currently they are sleeping on the same cot, although not for long at the rate that they are growing, so when one wails the other will be woken up also. It is hence very important for us to remove the wailing twin from the cot ASAP to prevent doubling (literally) our trouble.

As mentioned in my last post the twins, like Isaac, are also a little more unsettled during late night till early hours in the morning. Here is an example; I was back from the legendary Bangkok trip with Mike on Sat night and I was home close to midnight but I did not get to sleep till 6 the next morning. Perhaps the twins really missed their dad during his 3 days away. On Sunday I went to bed at about 4am and then 3am on Monday night. A definite improvement judging from the time but not nearly good enough if you ask me.

On Tuesday we brought the twins to Dr K, their PD for their BCG injections and the only question I had prepared for him was "Is it normal for them to be more unsettled at night?" His answer was they are unable to tell night from day so only way is to tire them out a little more in the day in order for them to sleep better at night and hopefully a routine will emerge after a while and they will understand that lights off means sleep time.

Since our visit to Dr K we have decided to stop swaddling them and make sure they get up for their feed every 3 hourly during the day. In the evening between 8pm to 10pm is the hardest because they are usually "gone" by then so it is very hard to try and keep them awake and not to the extent that they will get agitated and cry. If the previous 2 nights were anything to go by then our little "revenge" on the twins have paid dividend because they were sound asleep by about 11pm and went back to sleep without much fuss immediately after their night feeds.

The irony in life, well at least mine, was when the twins are asleep by 11pm I was wide awake. I remembered I stayed awake till Luke's next feed at about 2am and only went back to sleep at about 3ish. Looking back now maybe the 24 DVD did not help. Since I only had to feed Luke so the Mrs was able to have an uninterrupted sleep. Another irony was because Hayley was so quiet and did not wake up for her feed after 3 hours I got out of bed just before turning in to go check on her just to make sure she was alright. This is what I call the typical "baby-monitor syndrome". You leave a baby monitor near your baby so that you will be alerted should she cry. On one hand you wish she can sleep through and not bother you but if there was complete silence after a while you get worried and had walk over to take a peep.

Oh, about Hayley missing her feed at nights, no worries on that because she is now able to last up to 6 hours after each feed. We do not mind it so much during the nights but we made sure she did not miss her feeds during the day. It was a pleasant surprise for us and a quick check with Dr K revealed there is no cause to worry since her weight gain is normal. Hence we are allowed to feed her on demand at night.

Luke on the other hand is quite different. Not only did he gain weight he actually gained a little too much. In the 4 weeks between our visits to Dr K, Hayley gained a total of 1.1kg which was good while Luke gained a grand total of 1.5kg. He weighed in at 3.865kg on Tuesday while Hayley was 3.3kg. For those of you who aren’t parents yet, typical weight gain for infant should be between 800g to 1kg in a month so you do the math on Luke. The difference between the two is rather obvious now. You can tell just by looking at them and of course from carrying them. After the visit to Dr K we were told not to increase Luke's quantity and we have also decided to place him in the feed on demand program for both day and night. By the way they are currently on 90ml of milk at each feed and they are going through a tin of milk a week now!!

What is your opinion of having twins now?

At the time of publishing the most recent photos of the twins are not available so do check back to see if you can tell them apart.

Sawadeekup

2009-03-12T16:39:00.012+08:00

Hello! I am writing this post while waiting for my room at a hotel lobby in Bangkok but before you think "Wah!! The two of them are on a vacation so soon?!?!?!", think again. I am here on a business trip and for the record I rather not be here and leave the Mrs alone at home handling the twins. I am sitting here worrying how is she going to handle the two of them in the middle of the night. Instructions have been given to Ani to stay alert for these 2 nights once Isaac is asleep.

Actually I am only needed here for a meeting tomorrow but as it will take the whole day hence I am required to fly in a day earlier. So by right the Mrs only needs to handle the twins alone for one night but my bro, Mike needs to come and give thanks to the Buddha hence we timed it so that we can have a boys' day out on Saturday and as a result the Mrs has to take on an extra night. Very kind of her I know and I am grateful.

The Mrs and the 3 kids sent me to the airport this morning and I have to admit it was hard leaving Isaac. This is especially so when his eyes turned all red and teary when I got off the car and said "bye bye" to him. The closest I have felt like this was when the Mrs and I had to go on our holiday before we had Isaac and we had to leave Dino at the pet hotel. The way he looked at us while we walked away was so hard to bear.

Anyway kids being kids, with a little distraction Isaac was fine once again before the Mrs drove off. He was happy waving "bye bye" to me and busy giving me his flying kisses complete with the mmmmm.....uah......... sound! See below video for an example of how he does it.

An example of his "flying kiss"

Last night the Mrs discovered that it has been more than 1.5 years since I last travelled. I guess being parents will do that to one. Anyway because I had not travelled for so long, I almost did not make it this trip. Last night while packing I realised that my passport has less than 6 months before expiring.

What is the deal about this 6 months period anyway? I know it is an international regulation but why 6 months and not 3 or for that matter 1 month? Why is it that airlines will not accept you if your passport has less than 6 months before expiring?

So I was busy last night and this morning calling everyone I can think of, i.e. the ICA, Immigration at the Changi Airport, the airline office as well as their operations representative at the airport.

Read on only if foresee yourself being in the same predicament and you want to learn how we can overcome this situation.

Basically the local immigration told me that they have no problem with me leaving the country and as far as they know countries such as Thailand and Malaysia are pretty lenient with us. The reservation office of the airline said that since I have a confirmed return flight then it should also not be a problem. However the Operations Representative gave me a flat ‘NO!’ He said that the airline could be fined so they will not risk it.

My only option was to have my passport extended since I could not apply for a new passport and expect to collect it within 2 hours. A quick check on the internet states that passport extension is only possible for people under 17.5 years. So I did the smart thing and called ICA directly. The lady on the other line simply advised me to hurry my ass down to ICA with my travel documents and my photos and their officers will see if they could help me.

So to cut a long story short, there were basically 3 stages that I have to clear and all within an hour if I were to have any hope of making the flight. ICA is able to issue me a Document of Identity and the 1st stage was the toughest as I had to be interviewed by an officer and listen to her telling me off for not checking before booking my flight. I had to jump queue here (all 8 numbers) by walking around to see who was next and then approached her with my sob story.

2nd stage was pretty fast as it was only submitting my photos and making the payment of $15. Although I did not jump queue I had to walk up to the counter and rush the officer when the number before mine drew no response after 10 seconds. She was kind enough to buzz my number and then attended to me.

3rd stage was merely collection and I ensured the lady whom I handed the document over knew exactly how small a window I had. So after rushing everyone and jumping queue I finally made it out of there within an hour.

While waiting at ICA I suddenly remembered that I had not withdrawn any money and changed it to Thai Baht so depending on what time I got to the airport it may be another mad rush.

Thank goodness I managed to sort everything out within 2 hours if not I would have missed this important meeting with a principal who came all the way from Denmark and just as importantly disappointed my bro who must have been looking forward to this *legen……. wait for it …….. dary trip!

*Note: You will understand if you are a fan of the hit sitcom, How I Met Your Mother.

My next trip will be to Hong Kong with the Mrs and you can rest assured that this madness will not happen again for I am so applying for a passport renewal when I am back.

Now we are just considering if we can bring Isaac along provided he is no longer a bad boy and stop shouting.

Who is the bad boy?

Hear him SHOUT........!

Coping?

2009-03-06T13:16:00.004+08:00

"How are you two coping?" "Can you manage the twins?" "Must be tiring righ?" "Getting enough sleep?"

These seem to be the most common questions that people are directly at us at the moment. We have families, friends, neighbours, colleagues, relatives, readers and yes, even strangers asking us these types of questions almost on a daily basis.

According to the Mrs, there are even strangers who either made a slight detour or simply stood there and waited just to find out if they are indeed twins and ask how we are coping. These people are usually more amazed once they see how young Isaac is.

Now for the benefit of those who are followers of this blog, you will be able to have a better understand just how we are coping, struggling even sometimes.

Generally we are still coping fine with them. Ani as usual is still mainly taking care of Isaac with some additional work such as more laundry and of course the occasional helping out with the feeding and coaxing of the twins.

The Mrs and I are still the main caregivers to the twins. While I am at work she will handle them almost singlehandedly unless of course both of them cry or demand to be fed at the same time. Once I am back from work I will take over from the Mrs the main role of feeding, changing and carrying them. This is to give her a break after all she had to endure their crying and demands for most part of the day already.

There are basically 2 periods in a day that are most tiring. The first being the early evenings when we had to take care of Isaac as well since Ani has to prepare dinner and wash up after we are done amongst other things. This window although tiny, usually about 2 hours, is really quite tiring. Isaac is crawling, climbing and throwing things around non-stop and basically tearing the house apart. Once Ani is done with her chores and showered she will come and take over Isaac while we go back to concentrating on the twins.

For those of you who have been reading this blog since Isaac was a baby may recall that Isaac was usually very cranky during the night from about 9pm till about midnight before he will quiet down and go to sleep. I am wondering if it was our lifestyle when we were pregnant because the same is happening with the twins. They like Isaac are crankier during the night and will be better in the early hours of the morning.

The second most taxing part of the day for me is during the nights. For whatever reasons they will not be able to just lie in their cot and sleep after feeding, unlike during the day. They will be unsettled and before long we will have to carry them. Having said that I am grateful that they usually take turns to be cranky instead of both crying at the same time.

I was just commenting to the Mrs last night that it is starting to feel like there is a punishment waiting for me each night and that is to stand (罚站). Most probably due to the lack of exercise my back is starting to ache as well by standing and carrying the twin (sometimes twins).

So far this Wednesday night was the hardest because the twins took turns to be cranky and kept me up till 4am before finally allowing me to go to sleep. Even then I had to carry Hayley to bed and sleep with her in my arms. Whenever possible I will try and attend to the twins alone during the night feeds because I feel the Mrs is a little more impatient with them in the early hours of the morning. Who could blame her right? After all she had to suffer all the screaming from Isaac and wailing from the twins not to mention all the feeding and changing of diapers. Guess all she wanted was a few hours of uninterrupted sleep.

Besides being taxing on us physically, it is also very taxing on the monetary front. Take the diapers for example. A bag of 48 diapers will usually only last for about 3 days. The twins are fed and changed every 3 hourly so they will normally use about 16 diapers a day. Thankfully they are still on partial breast milk so this at least helps to reduce the consumption of formula milk.

I understand that there are parents who are successful in potty training their babies even at the very young age of about 6 months. Maybe this is what we should do although I know this is easier said than done.

Guardian

2009-02-26T14:16:00.012+08:00

One day while driving home, the Mrs suddenly mentioned that we should be more careful in taking care of ourselves now that we are parents of three. Maybe it was my driving that prompted her to think about this although I prefer to think that it was not.

The conversation then got interesting because she asked me if something were to happen to both of us tomorrow then what is going to happen to our three babies? Shouldn't we make a conscious decision now as to who should we entrust our babies to. This has been lingering at the back of my mind even till this day.

How do you decide who should be your kids’ guardian? What criteria must this person meet? What qualities must this person possess? Must this person be family?

If it is just one of us who are gone then this should not be an issue since the remaining party should be able to carry on parenting with the assistance and support from families and friends. Although I come from a very small family, only a sister actually, but I am very fortunate to have a couple of friends (more like bros) who I can count on. I know for a fact that should I be gone, they will render whatever assistance the Mrs may require while bringing up the kids over the years. Coincidentally all of us are the only son in the family so perhaps this fostered a brotherly bond amongst us. Take a bow guys! You deserved it!

Money should not be an issue with the amount of insurance coverage that I had bought for the two of us in case this should really happen. They should be taken care of in the monetary department. Now it is a matter of upbringing and whether this person is able and most importantly willing to look after the “Three Terrors”.

A condition that we insist on is the three of them must not be split up under any circumstances. I feel it is very important that they be brought up together which makes it even harder for the person to accept this responsibility.

I guess the obvious choice would have been family but all our parents are getting old so they will not have the energy to look after them. Don’t get me wrong though, they are the grandparents hence they are definitely playing a part in their upbringing. Next in line will be siblings. All our siblings have their own family and also their own issues (don’t we all) so it will not exactly be fair to impose the “Three Terrors” on them.

After that we only have good friends to consider but this group will prove even less likely since they are not obligated to take over no matter how good a friend they are.

This I believe is not something that we can come to a conclusion anytime soon. Furthermore both of us must agree to the appointment of this person which is always going to be tough if the names selection for the twins is anything to go by. However you can bet this time that there will not be a poll to help us decide.

Another thing that we should probably do is go to a lawyer and have a will drawn up. Please don’t mistaken us for millionaires but I learned that without a will it will only cause more inconvenience for the love ones you leave behind. They will not be able to access your bank accounts; it will take them months to get a hold of the title deed for the house and what about the disbursement of the insurance claim? I definitely do not want them to squander it all on a one year long round the world vacation. With the both of us gone, it will be helpful if the lawyers and guardian can see to it that only a certain amount is released to them periodically and enough of it is left for their education and living expenses.

While writing this post a movie came to mind, Raising Helen. Not sure any of you watched it since it is not a mega blockbuster with out of this world’s CGI. I find this show to be rather meaningful although it borderline on being a chick flick. In the show Helen was surprised by a letter to her from her dead sister explaining why she was chosen as her three kids' guardian. Maybe I will prepare a letter such as this too so our chosen one will be equally surprised unless of course there are volunteers now.

Anyone?

Overwhelmed!!

2009-02-20T11:19:00.017+08:00

A little late with this post but I am sure all of you will understand and forgive me since Hayley is home with us. Those of you who are on my friends list in Facebook would have known by now. She was discharged on Sunday, 15th February after having spent 12 days in the Neo-natal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). We were there bright and early at about 10am to meet Dr K, her PD to discuss her progress and then confirm her coming home. It was such a happy occasion and Luke was there to help receive his sister home.

Maybe she knew we were all waiting for her to come home because the last 2 days leading up to her discharge she increased her milk intake from the bottle instead of relying heavily on the tube. The minimum requirement for her to come home was she must be able to drink from the bottle every feed. In order not to stress her out Dr K ordered her to be fed every 2 hours instead of 3 and I guess that helped.

The first day home was a little challenging for us especially during the night and early hours of the next morning. Luke is on a 3 hourly routine while Hayley is still sticking to her 2 hourly feed. What this means is that there are times when we have to feed every hour on the hour. This happened at 10pm (Hayley); 11pm (Luke) and midnight (Hayley) followed by 2am (Luke & Hayley) before we go back to 4am (Hayley); 5am (Luke) and 6am (Hayley). So there was hardly any sleep for the both of us on the first night.

I had to take leave from work the next day to try and help the Mrs establish a routine or system so that when I am back at work she and Ani can handle the 3 of them.

First thing to do will be to try and adjust Hayley to 3 hourly feed instead of 2 so that they can be fed ideally about half hour apart. This will be less taxing on us in the night. We did this by calculating the milk required for a 3 hourly routine and then see if she could finish the amount. Being the good girl that she is, she finished what we had prepared and it did last her for about 3 hours before she needed her milk again. We monitored this during the day and by evening we were confident she will be able to join Luke in a 3 hourly feed from then on. One problem solved.

As the Mrs is still not producing enough milk to sustain the both of them, we have opted to go for half breast milk and half formula for the 2 of them. They will be alternated between the two kinds of milk. I am glad and proud that the Mrs is open with the idea of giving them formula as well and not all banged up on total breast feeding. She has adopted the "provide what I can" attitude.

Having both of them home has caused confusion when it comes to feeding and changing diapers and knowing who pooped and who did not. Initially we will sat there and stared into the air trying to recall which of them drank formula and which was on the expressed breast milk. It is really quite hard to recall when we were preparing and feeding them so often. It is a little like trying to recall where I parked the car every morning. It is always the same carpark so sometimes I get confused with where I parked last night with 2 nights before (then again maybe this only happens to me). By evening of the 1st day that Hayley was back we decided to come up with a simple table for recording so that we can keep track of who drank which type of milk at what time and when were the diapers changed. Another problem solved.

So far the two of them have been rather easy to handle (knock on wood now everyone) just as expected since all they do are eat, sleep and shit. However there are times at night that they just will not sleep in the cot but will sleep soundly with us on the bed. In the Mrs's words, "it is like they are allergic to the mattress in the cot". The minute we put them down they will be tossing and turning before crying but when we carry them to our bed they can lie still and sleep on the mattress.

I was commenting one day that actually the twins are nice to us because they seemed to take turn to cry and demand to be carried at night. It was one twin this night and the other twin the next. It is as if one twin will tell the other the adventure he / she had on our bed the night before and the other twin will try his / her luck the next night. The Mrs was commenting that they can nicer if they will both be good and not demand to be carried at night. To which I replied we should be grateful they do not both cry and demand to be carried at the same time.

Speaking of crying and carrying and feeding, the last few days have been hard on the Mrs. Most of you who follow this blog will know that the Mrs is the kind of person that does not like to stay cooped up at home. Even during confinement she will go out for a short while now and then. This time it is not so easy anymore since we have twins. While she can just pick up a baby, be it Isaac or Luke, and head out for her shopping and running of errands, she simply cannot manage 2 babies. As a result she has been a little down lately.

I believe it is not easy since all she does the entire day is feed and change the twins and for most part of the day not leave the room. We tried to occupy her time by giving her projects such as planning the first month celebration for the twins and also to put up pictures on our wall but it did not exactly lift her spirit. I try to be home earlier than usual to take over the caring of the babies but I believe she needed a breather. She said that she is overwhelmed!

I was worried that she will get into a depression so last night we agreed that she was to take the car and go out in the evening when I’m home to do her groceries and whatever else she wants. This will hopefully provide her with a little breather. Since I can manage the twins’ feeding and bathing alone and Ani is there in case I needed assistance, I thought she deserved the little break from her mundane routine.

We will be out on Sat for Hayley’s review so I am hoping that we can do a bit more before we come home so the Mrs can get some fresh air and some sun.

On the lighter side of things, Hayley was very cranky last night from midnight till about 2.30am before we fed her so we did not get to sleep till about 3ish. After their feed at 6 in the morning it was Luke's turn to be cranky. Being sleepy and tired I decided to take the easier option and picked him up and brought him to sleep with me on the bed. In the morning when the Mr was up and she asked me which twin I had with me I told her it was Hayley.

Will take more photos of them and upload after their first month celebration.

Separated

2009-02-13T11:12:00.008+08:00

First of all I would like to thank you all for your generous comments and congratulatory. You have actually set a record high for number of comments generated in a single post as well as hits in a single day.

There are a number of you who have posted your comments for the first time and like I said in my replies to you, please try not to wait for another birth announcement before you comment again because I have a really really strong feeling that it will probably not happen anymore. Three is really the max for us and like I said before in one of my earlier post, we do not preach accidents in the Tan family.

Speaking of replies, it did take me a while (3 attempts) but finally I managed to reply to each and every one of your comments. I do not believe I left out anyone no matter how long or short your comments are. It may be a little hard to trace my reply to your comment but they were replied in a chronological order.

One of the reasons this post took a while longer is also partly due to the fact that I wanted to reply to all your comments before I work on this. Largely it is due to my busy running around between home and hospital as well as managing my work and health. I was actually ill since Monday due to some flu virus.

Alright back to updating you all on the twins’ progress.

Luke was discharged on Monday after he showed that he is able to take to the bottle for all his feeds. He was about 2.3kg when he was discharged. The feeling was a little weird for me because for some reason I secretly wish that Luke can stay behind to accompany his sister and support her in her development. While I was happy that Luke is well enough to come home with us, I felt guilty leaving Hayley alone behind.

The Mrs is also struggling with this emotion and guilt. Since Luke's discharged we have been going to the hospital on a daily basis, sometimes twice a day, to spend some time with Hayley and to support and encourage her. The Mrs initially wanted to breastfeed her but most of the time she is too tired or simply lack the energy to latch on.

In order not to stress and exhaust her too much we have decided to stop trying to latch her on. Instead the Mrs will feed the two of them half breast milk and half formula. So Luke will be alternated between latching on and taking the formula through the bottle. The Mrs will express whenever Luke is on the bottle and save them for Hayley. This is also part of the reason why we are heading to the hospital on a daily basis, to bring Hayley breast milk.

From her birth weight of 1.995kg she dropped to below 1.8kg but she is slowly catching up now. As of yesterday she weighed in at 1.855kg. Weight although important but is not the reason why she is not able to come home. She is only able to complete her feed from the bottle a few times a day with the remaining times through the tube.

After our discussion with the PD yesterday when Luke went for his review, we have decided to lower her intake each time but increase the frequency. So instead of 35ml every 3 hourly she is now on 25 ml every 2 hours. We are hoping that with the lower quantity she can at least get all her milk through bottle. When she eventually comes home we may have to stick to the same 2 hourly feed of smaller quantity which will be hard on the Mrs as it allows her little rest.

As for Luke or Twin I as he is known in the NICU, he is progressing well. He is downing 50ml of milk with some of his feed already which leaves Hayley more to catch up.

It is almost like clockwork with Luke. He will almost wakes up every 3 hourly demanding for his milk. Sometimes he may be slightly earlier or an hour later. We are basically taking turns to feed him although the Mrs has to be up even though I’m the one feeding him and no it is not because she needs to supervise me in case some of you are wondering. When I feed Luke through the bottle she will have to wake up to express for Hayley.

After a little revision with the Mrs I believed we have re-established the method to bath Luke. I am again tasked with bathing him and eventually Hayley as well but I am not complaining except for belly button bit. I am really not very comfortable with the cleaning of the area surrounding what’s left of the umbilical cord. I’m sure many of you know what I’m talking about.

So far (knocking on wood), Luke is proving to be just like Isaac, a rather easy to care for baby. Oh and of course the similarity does not stop as there as most of you have pointed out.

This is Luke when he learned that he is coming home with us.

This is Isaac when he learned that he will have 2 siblings to play with in 15 month's time.

Last but not least the Mrs. She is doing so well and since we have to run about sorting things out for the twins, she has basically thrown her confinement out the window, not that we practice much in the first place. Those of you new to this blog may wish to check out how she did her last unconfined-ment here.

A little illustration on how well the Mrs is doing. She is sending me to work and then she will be driving the car to run whatever errands she needs to run. As she needs the lactician to assist her so she will also drive herself to Mt E. Oh, I should also add that she was running to and fro the hospital with Luke in tow most of the time.

I was just commenting how I am not used to her moving about so quickly now. At times she was even walking faster than me. It is good to see her almost back to her old self and being able to sleep. I think she will truly heal once Hayley is united with us.

She mentioned last night that it is always very hard whenever all of us, Ani and Isaac included visit Hayley only to leave the hospital without her.

Hi!!

2009-02-03T15:45:00.017+08:00

In life we can only plan so much and hope that everything will fall into place. However many a time things will turn out quite differently and sometimes they will make a slight detour but still manage to find its way back into your plan.

Yesterday we went to Thompson Medical Centre to have Dr C perform another growth scan for the twins. This was supposed to be the final one so that Dr N will know if we will perform the LSCS today or they can wait a little while longer.

The scan results showed the twins to be in good condition. Blood flow to them was good and the placentas were doing well also. There was enough water in the bag for them and their estimated weight was about 2.1kg each. According to Dr C we should probably try and wait for another week or two if we could so that the twins could further develop their organs and gain more weight.

The Mrs was a little disappointed to hear this cause we had our mind set for our LSCS today so the thought of delaying for another week or two didn't quite appeal to her. I think the lack of sleep and contractions were finally getting to her. Her tummy (see picture from earlier post) was really a little small for the 2 of them to maneuver in there so she felt them 24 x 7.

Anyway the final decision would have to wait till we had our discussion with Dr N. So once we were back at Mount E, we proceeded to do the CTG and coincidentally Dr N just had a delivery so he popped in to check on the Mrs. We showed the growth scan reports and after another round of VE it was found that the Mrs was 5cm dilated and his fingers could actually touch the leading twin's head.

We had to complete the CTG so Dr N went back to his clinic first to check with the PD if we should have the twins taken out based on all facts presented. We met up again in his office after the CTG and were informed that the recommendation was to proceed with the LSCS as planned. Dr N preferred for us not to wait till the last moment in case the leading twin decides to wait no more since he was already deeply engaged. Should he decide to come out we would have a problem because Hayley was in transverse position. To play it safe it was better to have the C-section and have the 2 of them removed in a controlled environment and condition.

We were sent to carry out our pre-admission and also to do some blood tests before we head home for the final preparation. The Mrs had to fast starting from midnight and we had to check in by 6 the next morning, 4 hours before the operation.

So this was it folks! The moment we had all been waiting for. Maybe it was not our first time we were not as excited. Perhaps it was because the Mrs was going under the knife hence we were a little worried and anxious.

When I woke up at 5.30 this morning to get ready I was surprised to find the Mrs preparing and watching season 3 of Grey's Anatomy at the same time. Maybe she was preparing herself mentally for what was to come........ not! She just could not sleep so she continued watching from where she left off.

So we drove to the hospital and I even managed to steal an hour or so of sleep before we were asked to go to the operating theater. I could not be there when she was administered the epidural. I had to change and then wait in the delivery suite and they came to get me once they were about to start.

I saw part of the preparation and just when Dr N was about to start, a nurse use a cloth to block my direct view of the procedure. She said that it was best for me not to watch as it might be a little too traumatic for me. Hmmm..... doesn't she know how to deal with boys? You never say "no" because it only make us want it even more. So I had to sit upright the whole time to see what was going on.

I remembered the Mrs asking me what was burning and when I turned to check I told her "you don't want to know". Her tummy was blocking most of my view since they were operating at the bottom of the tummy so I could see mainly the arc only. However I could still see the scalpel cutting the Mrs and there was smoke and burning smell coming from there.

The rest of it is a little hard to describe in words so I will let the below pictures do the story telling.

Disclaimer: If you are uncomfortable with blood or cannot watch shows like Saw I, II, III & IV or Grey's Anatomy and Nip / Tuck then I will strongly suggest that you scroll down fast with your eyes covered and skip to the picture of the twins!!! I will not be held responsible should you experience any discomfort or suffer from nightmares from the pictures and the descriptions.

Last warning!!

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This is the Mrs's upper tummy being held back by some tools which were tied to the bed over her head.

Boy Twin is out and Dr N cutting the umbilical cord

This is Girl Twin coming out from the womb

Girl Twin leaving the womb

Boy Twin being cleaned up

Girl Twin being cleaned up

Meet Luke Tan weighing in at 2.425kg

Meet Hayley Tan weighing at 1.995kg

According to the PD the twins will most likely go home only when they reach the 36th week which is next Monday. Meantime most people will not be able to visit them as they are in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU).

Right now the twins are doing fine and are able to breathe on their own. Blood test results will be back after 2 days then we will know their health conditions better.

Thanks for all your support, encouragements and advices during the last 30 plus weeks!

Anxious

2009-01-29T17:33:00.010+08:00

It has been more than a week and the Mrs is still required to go back to Mt E on an alternate day basis for her CTG (Cardiotocography). In case you think that having been through Isaac’s birth and now the twins I have learned some medical terms I like to clarify that I Googled it. For those of you who have not been through it, basically it is designed to monitor the twins’ heartbeat and contractions.

Based on what we have observed so far the Mrs is indeed having contractions or surges as our HypnoBirthing trainer would have us called it, and sometimes they can be pretty intense. However they are not regular enough to cause any alarm but according to Dr N we are getting there.

Fortunately or unfortunately, the Mrs is not too good at telling the difference between the actual contractions and the movement of the twins. Because her stomach is so stretched she feels just as uncomfortable whenever the twins move in her. She can of course tell when they kick or punch her.

Dr N did a vaginal examination on the Mrs today and found that she is actually about 2 to 3 cm dilated. He would like for us to wait as long as possible hence the close monitoring. We are scheduled to go back for the CTG on Sat and then again on Monday.

We are also scheduled to go for another growth scan on Monday and it will tell us if the blood flow is still going to the twins fine. Tentatively we are booked for LSCS (Lower Segment Caesarean Section – Googled too!!) on 3rd Feb next Tuesday in case the flow to the twins are not as healthy as we hope it to be.

Now there is this confusion between the Mrs and I. I thought that if according to the growth scan everything is good then we will continue to play the waiting game for a further week. Dr N will deliver the babies once they have reached 36 weeks (following Monday). But the way the Mrs interprets it is we will have them delivered no matter what on the 3rd. Guess we will keep you all in suspense a little further until we confirm with him when we next see him.

To be honest all this waiting can be a little unnerving for the both of us. Perhaps a little more so for the Mrs. On one hand she is so uncomfortable that she would like them out now but on the other hand we want them to take their time since it is better to fatten them up a little more first. Sometimes we secretly wish for Dr N to say ‘Okay my dear, this is it we can’t risk waiting anymore. Let’s have the babies out today.” but we feel rather anxious at the same time.

Is everything ready? More important, are we ready? Imagine all the night feeding only times two!!! I believe that once they are out it will be nightmarish for the next 2 years! If only we can click and fast forward to 2 years later. Then again it is the current me talking like this now because I’m sure the future me will be blogging about what an experience it is to watch the 2 of them achieving their many firsts.

Those of you who have been following this blog since day one will probably remember that I posted 3 pictures of the Mrs’s tummy around the 7th month. Click here to see. I believed I even inspired a reader to do the same on her blog. Now, sticking to the true tradition of this blog we have prepared for you the picture of the Mrs’s tummy at the current advance stage.

How? Does she look like she is carrying twins and about to pop?

Now on the lighter side of things, the following conversations happened during our previous visit to Dr N’s clinic.

Mrs: I need to go to the toilet.

Mrs: Oh! Better to go to the clinic first since I have to collect the dip stick.

Me: Oh ya! By the way why do they still make you pee on the dip stick? To test what? That you’re pregnant? I mean it is obvious isn’t it?!

Mrs: Of course not lah! Duh?!?!?! It’s to test protein, glucose amongst other things!

A few minutes later.

Mrs (giggling): Wah! Finding it very hard to do this nowadays because stomach so big cannot see where to put the dip stick anymore.

Me: Easy mah. Just stick it in like this (proceed to mimic).

Mrs: You think so easy ah!?! Imagine you have to pee on the dip stick blindfolded how?

Me: Like this lor! (pretend as if I’m holding the dip stick and swing from left to right)

Mrs: Sigh………

Stay tuned ya?! I have a feeling we will all get to see pictures of the twins in the next post.

Fall!!!

2009-01-22T11:15:00.008+08:00

I am sorry to tell you all that after a year Isaac finally had his first fall. I am of course not referring to those minor ones like when he was learning how to crawl or stand. He had a smaller fall and a rather serious one all in the space of 2 days and I am even sorrier to say that both happened during my watch! Sigh……

Isaac has learned how to get off beds and mattresses about 3 months ago and he is fearless and will attempt to use the same method to get off regardless the height. I guess at his age, height is really irrelevant to him. So whenever we let him play and crawl about on our bed we will usually be very careful and when he attempts to get off we will always hold on to one of his arm and let him lower himself and will only release our grip when his buttock touches the floor. For the past few months everything was fine and there weren’t even any near misses. That was until Sunday.

Like every day he was playing happily on our bed and had climbed down a few times already. Each time he had so much fun crawling around, screaming and climbing up to my TV cabinet and threw whatever that was within reach onto the floor. After a while I will tidy up everything and then carry him back to the bed and the cycle will continue. Maybe I was tired after repeating the cycle for a while and got careless or perhaps he was getting quicker because one time he was getting off from his weaker side (he is better at climbing off from his right) he slipped and although he landed on his bum he still fell backward and knocked his head on the cold hard floor.

Needless to say he cried but due to the impact being not that bad he was back to his normal mischievous self in a few minutes’ time. He was climbing down from the bed again and again.

The major one was on Monday night. The Mrs and Ani were busy in the kitchen going through what groceries to buy when they go out the next day and Isaac was playing on his own in the cot in front of the sofa where I was replying to work emails. He was throwing his toys at me and I will throw them back in. Then unbeknownst to me he threw a ball and it landed on a table which is about a metre away from the cot and he was trying to reach out and grab the ball. The next thing I saw was his 2 legs in mid air and he toppled over head first onto the ground.

He was probably in shock and there was a delayed reaction of about 2 seconds before he wailed after I picked him up and held him tightly in my arms. All the while I was rubbing the back of his head and walking around the house. The Mrs and Ani came running out when they heard me shouting “Oh no! Oh no!” right before he toppled over. The Mrs was about to burst into tears when she saw our precious baby on the floor. It took about 10 minutes and the combined effort of all 3 of us before he quieten down.

Once he was better he began to crawl around on the floor again but this time I was like a hawk watching over him. No matter where he crawled to I was directly behind him with extended arms waiting just in case. While he was busy throwing things off the TV cabinet again I was there rubbing his head and checking for lumps or bruises. Thankfully there was none.

I felt so horrible and kept on replaying the scene with his legs in mid air over and over again in my head. I was feeling uneasy the whole night but luckily he was able to finish his milk and slept with no problem. I even requested for the Mrs to enter Ani’s room to check on him a few times before we slept.

The Mrs knew I was very worried so she directed me to the SMH forum to read about other mothers’ experiences. From what I read, other than the height where Isaac fell from it wasn’t too bad in relation to what some other babies had to go through. I know it sounds bad but after reading these mothers’ experiences and know that their babies came out fine and probably even stronger I began to feel a little more assured.

The Mrs had to get an injection from the A&E at Mt E sometime around midnight so I told her to check with either the nurse or Doctor attending to her on what to look out for with Isaac’s fall. Below is taken from a leaflet that the kind nurse had given to us so I thought I share with all of you.

Head Injury Advice

The following are basic general information and advice on the above condition. The list is not exhaustive. In specific cases, the advice and instruction from your doctor may differ. Please follow your doctor's advice and seek clarification if in doubt.

After a head injury, please observe the patient closely for 24 hours, if there are no problem within 24 hours, the patient is usually fine. Occasionally, a problem may creep up later but being aware of what to look out for should safe guard against any late effects of the head injury.

Return to the emergency department if any of these symptoms arise:

1. Persistent vomiting more than 3 times

2. Persistent or worsening headaches more than 24 hours especially if not relieved with simple medication such as Panadol

3. Seizures

4. Any change in mental state e.g. confusion, unusual behaviour, memory loss

5. Drowsiness or difficulty in rousing

6. Visual blurring, unequal pupil size

7. Blood or clear fluid seen discharging from nose or ear

8. Any loss of sensation, strength of arms or limbs

Do not give any medication to the patient that may cause drowsiness e.g. cough and cold preparations.

## The above are information taken from the Parkway Health's 'Take Home Advice' leaflet found in the Mt E emergency ward.

Since Isaac is still very much a baby and hence the basic we had to look out for are giddiness; odd behaviour and vomiting.

Fast forward to the next morning, I was woken up by his banging and screaming. I never thought such noise will one morning be music to my ears! I immediately knew that the little rascal is fine and had probably forgotten about his dad’s failure to protect him the night before.

Now that we have gotten his first fall out of the way let us prepare ourselves for his many other firsts, both good and bad!!

Anytime!!!

2009-01-15T12:24:00.003+08:00

The Mrs is still going for her hormones injections twice a week and during the last one which was on Tuesday, she was “warned” that she should stop walking so much these days because the twins are ready for delivery anytime now.

One of the nurses in Dr N’s clinic happens to be a midwife as well and all she had to do was observed the stomach and placed her hand on it and she predicted that the Mrs can go into labour anytime already.

Few days prior to going to the clinic, the Mrs was already commenting that her stomach has lowered. She felt that the baby boy is engaging himself into position. Guess we forgot to inform him that he is coming out through another opening instead.

Although the advice was for the Mrs to walk less but with Chinese New Year around the corner she finds it very hard to stay at home. She is busy ordering and picking up the New Year goodies as well as the decorations. She was also shopping for new clothes, went with me to my tailor and at the same time busy organizing a family photo shoot with her family which consists of sub families for each of her brothers.

The photo shoot is taking place this Sunday so that we can have the pictures in time for the Chinese New Year. The Mrs started this family tradition that each year she will put up new pictures at her parents’ place. Last year it was pictures of all the grandchildren and this year it is family portraits for all the families. Each year there will easily be 40 – 50 people visiting my MIL’s place so it is very important for the Mrs that she keeps up with this tradition of adding new pictures.

At the rate that she is going I warned her last night that she might just end up spending her New Year in the Mt E delivery ward with no visitors since most people prefer not to go to a hospital during New Year right? It will really be ironic for her to prepare so much only to miss out on it all.

Instead of running around I asked her to stay at home and start planning the babies’ arrival and pack the bag to bring to the hospital for delivery. Compared to Isaac’s delivery we are so relaxed this time round. Nothing was really done or prepared. I am seriously not sure if this is due to our previous experience or simply our plain laziness.

The most urgent task on hand right now is actually to come up with an English name for the baby boy. We are such bad parents because whenever we have to refer to the twins, we are always saying “Oh, Hayley and the boy this” and “Hayley and the boy that”

Even in this blog you will see that I am still referring to him as the baby boy?!?!?! He does not have his own identity yet which is normally fine because we didn’t name Isaac till he was born but ever since we named Hayley we owe it to him to find him a name.

I know we have been down this road many times now but for some reason the Mrs and I simply cannot seem to agree on a name. The only thing that we could agree on was to follow a reader’s advice and that is to have his name begin with the letter 'L'. Fatih’s (the reader) reasoning was once she knew that we picked Hayley for the girl she automatically saw IHL which stands for In His Love. Since we already have the ‘I’ and the ‘H’ we are only missing the ‘L’. Thanks Faith for your suggestions.

Since time is the essence here I am appealing to you readers for your kind assistance once again. We need your suggestions on boys’ names starting with the letter 'L'. We will shortlist a few and then I will set up a poll for you all to vote. In theory the one with the highest votes will be picked but I cannot guarantee because I believe the Mrs may still want to have the final say. With her current condition would I dare go against her wishes?!

Let the naming exercise begin…………yet again!!

Moved!!

2009-01-07T13:51:00.002+08:00

I hope those of you who are reading this have a much better start to the New Year than me. I can’t say I have the worst start but it definitely could have been better.

I had moved back to my own place with my family on the 2nd of January, Friday. This is to prevent my relationship with my parents going further south. During the 3 months that we were there the tension just kept getting worse. So finally on New Year’s day the Mrs and I discussed and decided that we really have to move back to give each other more space and time to repair what was damaged and more importantly prevent any more unpleasantness.

It was an easy decision to make but we were worried that they might be further offended so I got my sis to help break the news to them. For some unknown reason my sis has to be the bridge of communication between my parents and I for serious matters. Anyway luckily for us they are both in agreement that this is the best for everyone.

The irony here is we wanted to move out to prevent any direct conflicts between my dad and me but now that we are home, it is my mum who is giving me a hard time. At first she was sad and disappointed that our relationship deteriorated so quickly but now it has gone from sad and disappointed to bitter and anger.

As my parents are not really the confrontational type so I had to send my sis to go and talk to them to see where according to them the problem lies because quite frankly I had no clue. All I can sense is that we are all not very happy.

After my sister’s probe and investigation, we realized that the problem lies with Ani and our ‘protection’ of her. My mum is upset that as a family we are ‘divided’ by a maid and that we are taking her sides and words over theirs.

In our defence, we are not protecting Ani but merely stating the facts. Since the last major issue between Ani and my dad we learnt that it has all got to do with 2 sets of methods of doing things and clearly my parents needed Ani to do it their way which is fine except that she has to do it ‘wrong’ first before she learns that my parents prefer it to be done in another way. Unfortunately there were probably too many ‘wrongs’ hence my parents are getting impatient and harsh with her to the extent that she rather not use her initiative to offer assistance for fear of getting scolded again.

We learnt now that it has gotten to a point that there is this stigma in the way they perceive Ani and her work. What is scary to me is what they perceived to be real they will believe in it whole heartedly. If we were to try and explain on her behalf then we will be deemed as siding her.

They also feel that Ani is always throwing our names at them but as an employee I can understand this act. If my direct boss asks me to do something in a certain way and his boss comes after me for that, my natural instinct will be to inform him that it was my immediate superior who asked me to do it in this manner. She has to defend her actions and that is to tell them that we had asked her to do it.

At the end of the day are all very small and trivial matters and I know that majority of their complaints have good and well intentions behind them. They are doing this for their love of Isaac but I still feel that there are simply too many things they are unhappy with already. Take for example my dad complained that Isaac’s nails were cut too short. Upon examining, the Mrs find that maybe only 1 of 10 was a little shorter but there was no blood and she understands that sometimes due to Isaac’s own movement this can happen so she will continue to monitor.

Another latest incident was my dad complained that Ani poured away the porridge and she is impatient with feeding Isaac. There is of course another side to this. Ani will feed Isaac porridge and there will come a point whereby he doesn’t want it anymore so he will spit it all out. After a few more tries then she will conclude that Isaac really doesn’t want it anymore so whatever is left in the bowl she will throw away and this is usually not a lot because by now she can roughly estimate how much will Isaac take. In regards to being patient when feeding him, I have to state that she is the most patient of us all.

It now came to a point that we dare not defend or explain on her behalf anymore so we will just go ‘Orh’ and then we will monitor at our end. For this I feel rather sorry towards Ani because I am unable to clear her name but this is the best for now. The plan is to move back and get off each other’s back for the next 3 months and hopefully things will improve.

My current headache now is what to do with Ani and all 3 babies after 3 months. I know for a fact that if we were to send them back to my dad’s place then all these nonsense will start again. So our only options are to send them to my MIL’s place or get a second maid and leave them all at home. We would rather not have to pick the latter unless absolutely necessary.

Guess we will cross the bridge when we come to it. Now we just want to enjoy some peace and quiet at our own home and look forward to the Twins’ arrival at the end of this month.

Party!!!

2008-12-31T15:28:00.026+08:00

It has been a while since I am able to sit down here at Starbucks Paragon to update this blog. Those of you who had followed this blog long enough may recall that a number of the posts here were conceived while sipping my cuppa here waiting for the Mrs to knock off or to be done with her shopping.

It is probably apt that I am finishing the last post of the year here.

Had my year end company lunch at The Line at Shangarila and since the Mrs is still busy reminiscing the good old times with her friends over some coffee, presumably at the PS Cafe, I decided to sit here and blog about Isaac's recent birthday party. So many of you had asked for pictures and updates so I felt I couldn't be lazy anymore.

Isaac's party turned out to be exactly what we had expected it to be, a rather small affair. Apart from the odd few who couldn't make it, most of our invited guest managed to make it so Isaac celebrated his 1st birthday with his immediate families and a bunch of his parents' close and good friends. To these family members and friends, we would like to express our heartfelt thanks for taking the time to drop by on Christmas Day. I hope you will mark it in your calendar permanently because from the look of it we will most probably be celebrating Isaac's birthday each year on Christmas.

I'm sure many of you had been down to the Ben & Jerry's at Vivo City and as I recalled one of you even had doubts that it can actually hold 40 people. Well, from our own experience it did hold about 40 people as well as made room for the buffet spread. Of course not all 40 people were seated down at the same time but somehow we managed.

I particularly like the fact that on this day, besides celebrating Isaac's birthday we were there to exchange season’s greetings and a few presents for the other kids and babies. It was also a good time for some friends who were too busy or whose offices are too far apart to arrange for the occasional lunch meeting to catch up.

Overall I would like to think that the party was successful where most if not everyone had a good time. We definitely do not regret holding it at Ben & Jerry’s because it is amazing to witness the effect that ice-cream had on both the young and the old. A couple of adults even had multiple servings of the free ice-cream (single scoop on a wafer cone) that we had promised.

Since a picture is supposed to say a thousand words I shall let them do the rest of the talking then.

The Venue

The Occasion

The Star

The Birthday Boy

The Cake

The Candle

The Young Lady Photographer

The Parents

The God Parents

The Paternal Grandparents and Cousin

The Maternal Grandparents

The Blowing of Candle

The Presents

Presents Unwrapped

As usual I have posted only limited pictures here. You are invited to visit me at Facebook to view the rest of them.

Lastly the Mrs, Isaac and I would like to give special thanks and credit to Crystal, the young and pretty photographer for that day. Incidentally she is also Isaac's God Sister.

Christmas!!

2008-12-23T12:44:00.005+08:00

The way I look at Christmas this year is rather different. In the past I have always enjoyed only the period leading up to Christmas. I always felt that somehow the actual day is a bit of an anticlimax perhaps due to the over hyped during the preparation and presents buying. In the end Christmas Day is just like any other normal day that we do not have to work.

Needless to say I am not a Christian or Catholic hence I feel the way I feel. Unlike all you religious people you will have churches to go to and families and friends to visit to celebrate Christmas.

This year however is different and it is all because of Isaac. Although he is probably too young to understand but whenever we are out shopping for presents and he is attracted by the decorations I will always tell him that all these decorations are preparations to celebrate his birthday. I believed very soon he will understand that when he sees such hype and decorations it means his birthday is near.

Many of you readers have commented how fast a year has passed and Isaac is turning one already. Personally it felt as if it was only yesterday that I was sharing with all of you my inexperience as a Father-to-be.

I can still remember the joy I had when I learned that we were expecting a baby and this being our first time I really wanted to document every step of the way. Besides I hoped that I can learn from all you readers hence the birth of this blog.

During this past year the Mrs and I had witnessed the birth and growth of Isaac. He was this ugly (yes I can say it now) little monkey look-alike baby that was rather yellow. He was so tiny that we could carry him in one hand to the shock of many people whom clearly did not attend Mrs Wong’s class.

If I breakdown his past year into quarters and describe how I remember them in relation to his progress, it will go something like this:

0 to 3 months

This is probably the easy time to handle him since all he did was eat, shit and sleep. Even though we had to wake up a few times each night to feed him, I had a lot of ‘me’ time. During the weekends, while he was sleeping in his cot I could be playing in front of my Xbox while the Mrs rested or do whatever she pleased.

So despite the nightly feeds which I helped, it was considered to be a piece of cake but not quite as fun to play with him.

3 to 6 months

To me this was perhaps one of the best stages for a baby to be in. Isaac still ate, shitted and slept a lot but he also added this element of fun because he was a lot more responsive. He was able to sit up with the aid of bumbo seat of course. He was smiling a lot and was still very easy to handle. Whenever we were busy we could simply placed him on the bumbo seat and carry on with our chores and he will just sit there and watch you go about your business, although not for long.

One of the highlight for us was of course his size. Back then he was rather chubby and really looked like he could really give the boy in the Nippon Paint commercial a run for his money.

6 to 9 months

To me this was the stage that was noisiest and wettest so far. Not only did he make a lot of ga ga noise he was also drooling and spitting a lot. He was much stronger hence the bumbo seat had to retire because he will tip himself over. Luckily we usually placed him and the bumbo seat on the sofa so he did not hurt himself.

At this age he also laughed the loudest and the most. He was usually very ticklish and when he was in the mood one can make him laugh effortlessly as video evidence posted in this blog had shown.

Although he was crawling he was unstable so we had to follow him every step of the way just to try and prevent him from plunging head first into the concrete floor. This was perhaps the hardest part due to all the back ache.

9 to 12 months

He is a lot more demanding at this stage. He has learnt how to express his displease (read complain) and be sure that everyone at home will know. When placed in the playpen he will throw all out the toys and stuffs in there if he is unhappy or happy and simply wants to get your attention to play with him.

Due to his strength and weight he is a lot harder to handle now. We were out shopping for Christmas presents with him last weekend and after carrying him for about 3 hours straight I had to admit my back felt like it was going to give way.

He has learnt how to get off the bed and crawl to wherever he likes so he needs to be watched all the time. He knows no fear and it does not matter how high the beds or sofa are he will apply the same method that he learned from the low mattress and try to climb down.

Although he has laughed less these days but he has certainly smiled much more. He is definitely much more fun to play with bearing the back ache on my part of course.

Here's wishing all of you a very Merry Christmas and a Wonderful New Year!!

Birthday!!

2008-12-15T16:12:00.003+08:00

I’m sure those of you who have been following this blog long enough will know that Isaac’s birthday is coming up. For the benefit of those who have no idea, his birthday happens to be on Boxing Day!

Our friends, family and even readers of this blog have expressed interest as to how we are going to celebrate for him and how is the preparation so far.

To be honest, at the time of posting the Mrs has only confirmed a Wednesday meeting with the Manager of Ben & Jerry’s at Vivo City for further discussion and possibly leaving a deposit. So literally nothing was done or confirmed yet. It is very unlike the Mrs to leave things to this late but I think I need to clarify on her behalf.

Originally I was the one who did not want to do anything because my logic was Isaac does not really have any friends yet. So it will turn out to be just an excuse for us adults with the family in tow to meet up and gossip. No offense to all of you who are celebrating or have celebrated your kid’s birthday but I thought it was rather meaningless from Isaac’s point of view. I thought we should leave it be until he has his own friends in the form of classmates in the future.

However almost everyone around me, the Mrs included feel otherwise. They all feel that we must celebrate Isaac’s birthday especially this first one. The minimum we should do is have a dinner with the immediate families, i.e. Isaac’s grandparents, aunts and uncles from both sides.

Majority of the people of course prefer something a little more party like so the Mrs had been kept busy thinking and researching what we can do. It was not easy largely due to our intention to hold it on Christmas Day so most places and food will not come cheap.

Another reason was due to the Mrs’s condition also since we were not even sure if she can make it should there be a party as she was supposed to be resting in bed till she delivers. So everything was held back and by the time I was convinced to do it for Isaac we’re worried most people cannot make it since it is Christmas Day after all.

Now we have more or less an idea already and that is to hold the party at Ben & Jerry’s where we will cater food, order a birthday cake and of course everyone young and old gets ice cream. The Mrs is now busy sourcing for caterer because we do not want to have a Christmas menu and that is proving to be a challenge.

At one stage I suggested to the Mrs that maybe I should invite all you readers to the birthday party as a get together and meet Isaac in person session but since there is no way of knowing how many, if any of you would like to come or be able to make it, I decided it is probably not a good idea. I’m sure you’ll appreciate it is impossible for me to cater the food with the attendance unknown.

However if you are in town and not too busy attending church or visiting your relatives and happen to be in Vivo City on Christmas Day, do drop by Ben & Jerry’s between 2 to 4pm and I will buy your children ice creams.

With all the Christmas decorations wherever we go, I am beginning to explain to Isaac that everyone is preparing to celebrate his birthday. I tell him that whenever he sees such decorations it means that his birthday is just around the corner.

Oh and speaking of Christmas and birthday, all friends and relatives reading this, please be advised that Isaac will be expecting 2 presents from each of you because presents for Christmas and his birthday should be treated as separate issues.

Lastly I would like to announce a new tradition in the Tan’s household and that is each kid of mine will have to get their mother, namely the Mrs a present on their birthdays. This is to thank her for all the ‘sufferings’ that she had to go through carrying them to term and also for delivering them to this world. Personally I do not know anyone practicing this but I would like my kids to do that for their mum although it can only commence when they are slightly older.

Modeling

2008-12-10T11:43:00.020+08:00

Two Fridays ago Isaac had his first taste of what it was like to be a model. I believe he now understands that it is a tough job being a model although I feel that he has all the makings to be one and it is not because he has the X factor or he looks extremely good in photos.

It is perhaps easier for me to list down a few of the things that he did that has Top Model written all over it.

- Walked (ok, more like crawled) off the set whenever he pleases.

- Natural in front of the camera. In fact he was so natural one could say that he was oblivious to the photographer and the shoot itself.

- Throwing tantrums while shooting. He was throwing away props that were required for the shoot once he felt he had enough shots with them.

- So comfortable with a whole entourage of crew (made of parents, godma, god-sister and maid) following him around, changing him and attending to his every need.

- Turned all cranky when he was tired and would not continue without having a rest or some fun first.

- Had his artistic views as to how the shoot should be. It took a lot of persuasion from his managers (parents) before he agreed to wear the chef’s hat and even that it was only for a very short while.

- Had no problem baring his body or modeling in his undies (diapers) so long as they are done in an artistic manner. Calvin Klein, in 20 years time perhaps?

Back to the shoot, it was all thanks to a reader friend, Evelyn (Thanks E!) for recommending Isaac to her sister-in-law, Jacqueline who is setting up her own photography business, Soul Photography. Jacqueline was looking for babies as models to increase her portfolio so Evelyn asked if we would be interested to help. This was when the Mrs was thinking of engaging a photographer to take family photos for us and maybe even herself while she is still pregnant so we agreed.

Jacqueline’s concept for her business is to go bring her studio to the comfort of the client’s home instead of having everyone travel to a studio. This is perhaps most useful with the toddlers since they will be more relaxed in a familiar environment. Not to mention the clothes, toys and props that are available at one’s home instead of picking and choosing the few that one has to bring to the studio.

Since Isaac’s Godma has a rooftop garden at her place the Mrs thought it will be more interesting to conduct the photo shoot at her place instead of ours. The plan was to focus mainly on Isaac with a few family shots and if the Mrs was up to it then she will have her own photos taken with the big tummy as well. Unfortunately she wasn’t really feeling up to it that day and all the coaxing and getting Isaac’s attention wore her out even more. As a result she took only a few pictures with us.

We were initially a little worried as to how Isaac will ‘perform’ that morning and will Jacqueline find him to be a prima uomo and difficult to work with. Luckily all our worries were unfounded because Jacqueline being a mother of 3 boys knew exactly what to expect from kids at Isaac’s age. She was very patient with Isaac’s many movements and will work around him to find the angle or shot that she wanted.

Prior to the shooting she was also opened and was willing to discuss any concepts or ideas that we had in mind.

Right now she is having a promotional package so you might want to find out more from her website or discuss with her what you hope to achieve. Have fun shooting!!

The above are only a handful of the pictures that we got from Jacqueline. As usual I will put up the rest of them plus whatever shots that we took on the same day in my Facebook!

Mistake?

2008-12-02T13:54:00.009+08:00

Haven’t we all heard from friends and relatives or read through forums that there is someone who knew someone who was told she was carrying a baby of one gender but came out another?

Ok, maybe to find out only during delivery is a little extreme because I would imagine that the couple would have gone for a few more scans from the time the gender was announced till delivery right?

I think it matters little when the couple found out about the ‘mistake’ because if it was the gender that they really wanted and it turned out different it would be quite devastating especially if it is their 3rd or 4th attempt. On the other hand for a couple that wanted a gender and got their wish later it will be an absolute delight for them.

Personally I have never come across anyone I know that had such an experience. Come to think of it I have only heard of such an incident through people who happened to know someone from work or some acquaintance and I don’t even remember who they are now or how the story goes. It is almost like an urban myth to me.

The reason I brought this up is because for some reason the Mrs was having this really bad feeling that maybe Hayley (Yes she has decided on this name) is a boy after all. Maybe it was her paranoia but she was definitely feeling rather uneasy. When telling people of the twins’ genders she was always a little hesitant. She was always saying it like it is only 90% sure.

I guess we should have named her Hayden instead huh?! In case you’re not aware Hayden is a unisex name just like Dylan.

So since about 3 weeks ago when we found out that we are expecting a Boy / Girl combo, she has been looking forward to yesterday’s appointment with Dr N to double and triple confirm that it is indeed Hayley in there.

I believe she feels a little more stress now that we are receiving gifts for Hayley. This is also probably why she has not been buying anything for her whenever we are out. I can sense the urge to buy her something whenever we are in Baby Gap or Zara looking for clothes for Isaac but she always resisted because deep down she is worried that there is a mistake with the gender.

It got to a point that even I was beginning to believe her that maybe just maybe we weren’t so lucky after all. When carrying Isaac the Mrs did not have any such strong feelings towards the baby’s gender. At least back then I dreamt of playing with a boy (can’t remember his face of course) so that got me to think that he was a boy. So to hear that she has such bad feelings about this ‘mistake’ it sort of unnerved me as well.

Anyway as you know by now we went to Dr N’s clinic yesterday for her routine checkup and to make sure that they twins are growing fine because the Mrs has hardly gained any weight since her pregnancy. This by the way was also another concern of ours.

The good news is the Mrs and the twins are all doing fine. The twins are growing within the average percentile and their weight is slightly below that of a singleton at the same stage but that is acceptable.

When Dr N started the scan the first thing I told him to check was the twins’ gender and I told him about the paranoia that the Mrs was experiencing. While having a good laugh he proceed to check and the result is the below picture.

I was considering if I should post this scan but on second thought how many of us can seriously make out what it is right? Unless of course you are a trained Doctor but I have a feeling that there are no Doctors amongst you readers.

So for the whole lot of you who cannot make out what the picture is and after torturing you for the last 5 minutes or so, you will be pleased to know that we are indeed having Hayley after all.

Bad Boy??

Recently we discovered that by his own admission Isaac does not believe that he is a good, great or excellent boy. Don’t believe me? Watch the below video.

Blues

2008-11-27T10:21:00.003+08:00

Recently I had a first hand encounter with depression and postnatal blues. Originally I wanted to blog about it from my (an outsider’s) point of view but I felt I needed to get permission from the person suffering from it first.

So I approached my sister after she was feeling better and asked if it will be alright with her for me to blog about her experience to the world. Being a sport that she is, she actually suggested that perhaps she should guest write instead.

So here it is:

I am one who is seldom at a loss of words. This is one of the rare occasions. I was asked by my brother to share something very personal with all of you and that is my experience with postnatal depression (PND). It wasn’t hard for me to agree to it because I hope by sharing, my experience will help some of you who are either having PND or someone whom you know has it.

It all started for me when I was extremely adamant about breastfeeding. In this day, breastfeeding is often deemed as the right, best and the only thing to do for your kid. And hence, to me, breastfeeding equates to what a good mother’s duty is.

Being so adamant about breastfeeding, I was latching on once every 3 hours and I soon had insomnia. This was because after each feed, there was always the issue of the next feed at the back of my mind – will I wake up in time, is my milk supply enough, how do I build up my supply, will eating such and such food affect the taste of my milk and hence rejection from my baby. My insomnia soon turned chronic. It was so bad that I slept a total of less than 7 hours in 3 days. By then, I was a lost cause – I had a glazed over look in my eyes, my body was shutting down, my milk supply plummeted due to the lack of rest and I barely had the strength to carry my daughter. When I visited my gynae, he suggested giving me a sedative to take so that I can sleep through one to two nights and basically reboot my system. Well, perhaps it was Murphy’s law but what happened was after taking that sedative, I actually sleepwalked. My husband told me that I woke up in the morning and walked him to the door, kissed him goodbye and spoke with him yet I recalled none of it. The scariest part was when I realized upon being “awake” that my hair was nicely plaited (my hair is always left undone when I sleep) and the T-shirt I wore to sleep was different from the one I had on in the morning. It was then that I freaked out because I had no recollection at all of what I did, where I went and whom I spoke to. I admitted myself to the hospital right away.

I stayed for a total of 4 days in the hospital for respite care and it was quite possibly one of the lowest points in my life because I actually lost total confidence in being able to fall asleep naturally. Insomnia is a horrible horrible condition – the rest of the world is sleeping and you are awake pacing around at home, dead tired to the bones but still unable to shut down mentally and rest, while watching the clock the entire time and wondering what on earth is wrong with you.

After I was discharged, I also had very bad hot flushes (which further hindered my sleep) and hyperacidity where I needed to eat once every 2 – 3 hours and I was gorging myself silly with food. I had 2 bowls of rice at every mealtime and a “snack” would be 4 slices of bread, a banana, an apple and a milo and I still did not feel full.

In depression terms, it was comfort eating but for my case, it was also because the stress level I had cause the hyperacidity and hence, I had to eat. For someone who only gained 7kg during my pregnancy and has never weighed past 50kg, it was a sudden shock to see the scale go up.

To top it off, my baby is very alert and active since birth and does not sleep much unlike most newborns. Hence, fatigue and stress and insecurity set in. I became obsessed with my ‘failure’ as a mother and my weight gain. Being depressed also caused lethargy which made it even worse for me because I have always been a very active person and was exercising right through my pregnancy. It was hard for me to wake up and feel spaced out and groggy and barely having enough energy to accompany my dad walk my brother’s dog in the morning.

On a good day, I was able to converse normally, laugh and joke but on a bad day, I would feel like such a complete failure and was simply detached from the world with no interest in getting out of bed, talking to anyone and having any interest in anything. I just wanted to be left alone and ‘rot’ in one corner. The scariest moment was that at my down-est time, I actually had a thought pop into my mind and that was “how I wish I could chuck my baby down the chute”. My “rationale” was that if that happens, then I would have no one to worry about, to care for and no one to depend on me. That was when I realized that I had depression.

Next to my husband, my brother is my other best friend and we have always been very honest and close. It was him who called me up one evening and spoke to me very openly about his observations on my mood swings and condition. I broke down and cried and admitted that I needed help. My sis-in-law and him, God bless their souls, had already started asking around about depression since weeks ago when they first noticed that I was a bit off. I was able to get an appointment with a psychiatrist the following day and started treatment immediately.

I am now seeing the psychiatrist on a fortnightly basis and am on a mild anti-depressant dosage. The fact that I am not in denial about my condition, she says, make me very treatable. Additionally, I also sought help early as I truly want to get better soonest possible.

Based on my visit with the psychiatrist, PND usually happens to perfectionists and yours truly, am definitely one. It is because perfectionists having type A personality have a fixed set of ideas and mindset about how things should be and we are usually the ones who keep anticipating what can go wrong to prevent things from going ‘wrong’. But of course, as we all know, babies do not have a “fixed” set of rules and habits and hence, it is this same trait that caused my chronic insomnia.

I now force myself to head out of the house everyday with my domestic helper and do simple things like heading out for lunch, grocery shopping to start injecting some normalcy back into my life. When I am out, most often than not, strangers would come up to me and touch / play with my baby and comment on how lovely she is. These comments help me drastically as they make me realize how lucky I am to have such a healthy and beautiful baby when there are many who are not able to conceive.

I am also extremely blessed because I have very strong family support – my mother-in-law has been staying with me for the past 3 odd weeks to help me with the night feeds despite having a full time day job; my sister-in-law though pregnant has been there to comfort and console me and drove me to my psychiatrist visit; my husband who despite his very punishing work hours, stayed with me in the hospital even when he ended work only at 11+ and had to leave for work again at 7+am the following day and my parents who constantly called and brewed tonics for me.
I would like to end off by saying that having PND does not make us a lesser parent or person and it is not a disease nor is it something to be ashamed of. It is simply a condition that we have that is treatable so if you are suffering from PND or know someone who seems to have the same symptoms that I had, please seek professional help and you WILL get better.

Guests

2008-11-20T12:51:00.002+08:00

A little over a year ago when we found out that we were having Isaac, we thought of moving back in with my parents because we would like for them to be able to spend more time with their grandchild instead of just weekdays and during office hours.

So I checked with my mum and was rather disappointed and hurt that they rejected the idea. I believed that the Mrs felt terrible then too. Naturally no one likes the feeling of being unwelcome.

In my mum’s defense she has always told my sister and I since we were young that she does not want to live with us once we have our own families. The reason for this is she believes that by staying together we will have more conflicts and clashes hence it is better that we meet once or twice a week.

My dad's main reason for turning us away was he was worried that he will have arguments with me. Back in my younger days when I was still a little more hotheaded I will not back down from any arguments with anyone, my dad included. However with the help of the Mrs I have learnt to control my temper better and I had no argued with my dad for years now.

Although I knew my mum’s standpoint on this but somewhere in me I always thought that I could get them to move in with me eventually hence when faced with the reality I was disappointed.

Looking back now, after having stayed with them for the past five weeks I am glad that the whole moving in together for good thing did not materialised.

For the past few days the Mrs and I were quite vexed because Ani was having problems with my dad. It all started on a faithful Thursday when my friends and I were planning to have a game of mahjong and because there were not have enough chilled can drinks in the fridge, Ani took the initiative to leave a few cans in the freezer with the intention to remove them after about half hour or so. This is common practice in my own household. Unfortunately when my dad came back and saw the cans in the freezer he was shocked and shouted for Ani asking her to remove them fearing that they will “explode”. He was not aware of her true intention plus he did not know how long had the drinks been in there.

Since then things seemed to have gone downhill between the two of them. After that incident Ani was terrified of my dad so she had not been smiling and neither was she warm towards my parents and even resorted to avoiding them. My parents in turn thought that she was showing them the ‘black face’ and being rude so things got out of hand pretty quickly.

Although I was out at work but I got constant feedback from the Mrs everyday through Skype on what was going on at home. I pity the Mrs because she was right in the middle of the tension when she was supposed to be resting and instead she had to spend more hours hanging around in the dining area just watching everyone and assessing the situation.

Her birthday was sort of ruined by this entire matter also. She lost the mood to celebrate and did not want to go out for dinner because she did not want Ani to be left alone to eat with my parents resulting in everyone feeling awkward.

Finally after speaking to both Ani and my mum we started to piece together where the real problem lies.

It is all about having 2 systems in 1 household with Ani caught right in the middle. She was being told off for doing things in ways that were the norm in my own home but not to my dad’s likings, e.g. the chilling of fizzy drinks in the freezer issue.

They are all small and petty matters but I believe after many of such incidents Ani finally could not handle it anymore. On one hand she did these things because she was taught to do it in our own home but on the other hand my dad will tell her not to do it. I believed she felt really caught in-between.

My parents have never been the confrontational type when it comes to my sis and I. Over the years whenever they want to learn things about me, they will call my sis and vice versa. For some reasons they do not like to bring it up to us directly so in this case they will tell Ani not to do instead of coming up to us instead. Ani on her part does not want to relate stories to us so she will just shoulder it herself.

Last night the Mrs and I sat down with my parents to explain to them what had been happening at home was really miscommunications and a big misunderstanding and we hoped that they will understand that Ani is not showing anyone ‘black face’ but she is merely sad hence not smiling. We tried explaining to them that she was used to our way of doing things but did not realize that they are not applicable here.

I also tried explaining to Ani that she should not feel sad because such things do not apply to her alone. It applied to the Mrs and I as well. In our own ways we also feel like we are guests under my parents’ roof so there are things that we could not do even though we wanted to or had been doing at home.

By having 3 additional adults and a baby moving in full time we will not doubt cause inconvenience to them. Everyone has their personal space reduced and as a result frictions may have been caused.

Even simple things like the fridge will also be an issue because in the past my parents are not used to having things such as fresh milk, orange juice, cheese dip and other unfinished stuffs taking up space in their fridge. Suddenly they find their fridge not big enough to contain all the things they want in there anymore so they had to remove part of it.

During the conversation last night I told them to be patient with us and we only have a few more months here before we move everything back and they can have their own space back minus rooms for their additional 2 grandchildren.

I understand now that whether we move in with them or they move in with us is really not a good idea because they will feel exactly like guests under my roof and as a result they will not truly be at home and comfortable which is exactly what we are feeling now.

Joys

2008-11-10T13:39:00.020+08:00

Recently I noticed that as a parent I am able to find joy in the simplest of act or places. I have listed down a few of the routine things that will always bring a smile to my face. I sincerely hope that they have the same effect on you as they do on me.

Shower:
Whenever I see Ani showering Isaac I will automatically smile to myself. In fact the mere thought of him sitting down on his Ikea stool playing with water while Ani fusses over him is enough to put this silly grin on me now. Somehow seeing this little man sitting down naked and playing with water has this effect on me. Sometimes when he made eye contact with me he will smile and want to crawl towards me. That will be my cue to leave. It has been a while since I shower with him and truth be told I do miss it.

Body:
For some unexplainable reason I will always smile when I see his naked body. I like to watch him struggle and crawl around when Ani tries to put some clothes on him after his shower. Maybe it is his plus size that makes me happy and proud. So many others have ‘molested’ and squeezed his thighs, arms and of course pinched his chubby cheeks.

Eating:
Watching Isaac eats brings enormous joy to the Mrs and I. We like to watch the greedy side of him whenever we eat. He will move his mouth as if he is chewing on the same food (what I termed eating air). These days he will even try and reach out for the food as if to tell us he wants a piece of the pie too, literally. When we put food in his mouth the way his chubby cheeks move will usually make us laugh. He is ever ready to open his mouth to whatever we place in front of him. For the record, Isaac has passed the 10kg mark already in case you’re wondering.

Feeding:
Honestly I have only tried feeding him his porridge once. Usually it will be Ani that does it because it can get rather messy both for the one eating and the one feeding. However I still enjoy feeding him his milk. It gives me a sense of achievement when I managed to make him finish his 240ml of milk before going to sleep. Sometimes he will turn and fuss about and it can be a struggle but when he finishes the last drop I will have this immense pride.

Carrying:
It started a couple of months back, Isaac was on his walker and he charged towards me when I got home from work. He then reached out his arms, a signal for me to carry him. That was definitely one of the defining moments for me as a dad. Ever since then I will be happy whenever he reaches out to me, be it in his walker, in his play pan and especially in another person’s arms.

Smiling:
I’m sure those of you who have been following Isaac’s growth will now be quite accustomed to his infamous smile. Actually be it the cheeky (mischievous) or the genuine happy-to-see-you smile I am thrilled to see my boy smile. Sometimes when he wakes up he will flash you this smile that will warm your heart and make you wish he stays that way forever.

Sleeping:
Putting Isaac to sleep can be a real challenge sometimes. He will struggle and want to continue playing. At various stage of his growing up there is a different method of putting him to sleep. When he was much younger and sleeping in the cot in our room, I will give him his pacifier and place one finger in each of his hands. This is to prevent him from rubbing his face and accidentally removing his pacifier. These days I will put him on the bed with all the lights off (this is important) and place him right next to my chest. He will play with my t-shirt with both his hands for a while before eventually drifting off to sleep. Watching him sleep makes me happy. It is partly due to the fact that we can all rest now but mainly it has this calming effect on me.

The above are just the joy that I managed to derive from the routine of caring for and playing with Isaac. With the Twins’ coming I can only hope that this amount of joy will be tripled.

Revealed

2008-11-05T13:41:00.031+08:00

It has been more than a month since the bleeding episode and finally the fact as to what actually happened was revealed yesterday. A few of you were probably thinking of the twins’ genders revelation instead right?!?!?!

Yesterday was our review date with Dr N but before our appointment with him we had to go and get this really detailed scanning done. This was exactly the same as the one which we did a few months back. It took about 2 hours and cost us $520.00.

This scan was really detailed in that it scanned the twins’ lungs, kidneys, hearts and many other measurement. It took an average of about 45 minutes for each twin.

So the good news is that the Mrs and the twins are all doing well. They each weigh about 400gm at 22 weeks and the difference in size is not much between them which is good otherwise we will have something to worry about.

Besides the physical we also tested and calculated the odds of them being down syndrome and the odds look good at 0.032% or something like that. All I know for a fact is our odds is even better than a younger girl in her twenties carrying a singleton. Needless to say I am really relieved to learn this.

Now as to what caused the bleeding, it appeared to be the shifting and detachment of the membrane. So it was not from the placenta which is excellent news and although one of the placentas is low laying it will gradually move upwards as the twin grows. So right now it seems we are at the edge of the woods and although not quite out of it we are not really in danger so long as the Mrs continues to rest and not exert herself.

She is to continue her hospitalization leave and we will be seeing Dr N again on the 1st of December and follow up with another round of this very detailed scanning on our 29th week.

Now those of you who thought that this post was about the revelation of the twins’ gender from reading the title you are correct!!!

Before the scanning got started the Mrs was asking me if we should know and my answer was “No I do not need to know”. Then she told me that she is 80% inclined towards knowing and seeing how much she has to suffer I told her the decision is hers to make. I know that if there is a girl in there then she will be over the moon and the rest of her “confinement” period will be much easier to bear.

So while she was contemplating the Professor came over and we exchanged greetings. Now usually at this point I will remind the good Professor or whichever Doctor that we do not want to know the gender but in this case I let it be since the decision is left with the Mrs. However before the Mrs could say anything the Professor started the scanning and fate has it that where he placed his scanner was the exact position of the Twin’s private. So he happily told us……………………………

Wait for it

See his birdie?!?!?!

The Mrs was a little dumbfounded and she later explained to me that she had the intention to stick to not knowing but who knows the scanning started at the exact spot.

Now that the gender of one of them is revealed I have to admit even I am dying to know the second one because we really hope that that it will be a girl. Unfortunately for us we had to wait till he finished the scanning of the boy first and like I said, it was a good 45 minutes and this was probably the longest 45 minutes of my life so far.

During this time all I can think of was the statistics that for fraternal twins the percentage of having a boy / girl twins is 50 while all boys is 25. Then I started to think 25% versus 50% is not really much if you asked me unlike say 80% versus 20%. So I just sat there patiently while the Mrs was probably crossing all her fingers, toes and hair and pray that the remaining twin is a girl.

Dr N had to perform an emergency operation in the morning so our appointment was postponed indefinitely until they called. In the meantime I decided to go for a hair cut since Isaac’s Godma called and asked if we were in town to meet up. The Mrs had been complaining about Isaac’s hair being long, messy and ugly (refer to the cheeky smile photo in the previous post) so I decided to bring him to my regular stylist and let her work on him also.

Overall the experience was not as terrifying when compared to what some of you had to go through because Isaac was not screaming or kicking. I was holding him and although he was not very cooperative he did not kick up a big fuss. He merely turned his head to face the stylist whenever he saw the scissor coming towards his head.

Before he realised what was going to happen.

So far so good!!

A little nervous perhaps??

A while later we found a way to best do this and that was to put him on the table and let him sit on his own while the rest of the stylists who are free in the saloon distracted him from across the table. It was a Tuesday afternoon so they were not particularly busy hence no less than 5 of them were playing with him. With this new arrangement the cutting was done rather quickly. Although I was quoted $25 for Isaac’s haircut my stylist decided to not charge after all. Thanks a lot for that Lily!! Maybe she knew I needed the money with the twins coming.

How?? Handsome?? Sharp??

Speaking of twins you didn’t think I forgot to mention the gender of the other twin did you?!?! I merely wanted you to go “Huh?!?! Wait?!?! Did I miss something here? What about the other twin?!?!” Hope none of you cheated and scrolled down to find the answer first like I would probably have.

Anyway after the 45 minutes wait, the Professor was very nice because when he started working on scanning on the other twin he went searching for the private before anything else and.........................................

Wait for it

We have a girl as well!!

The Mrs was so happy that she was giggling like a school girl. She must be so relieved since people around us including myself kept on saying that we have this feeling that they will both be boys.

What about you? What was your guess initially?

Salute!!

2008-10-29T13:14:00.012+08:00

I have the luxury of staying at home with the Mrs and Isaac for the last 4 days and it will be 5 including today. Besides the weekend, we had a Public Holiday on Monday and I am currently on 2 days MC so in total I will be spending 5 whole days with them.

During these few days I learned that Isaac can be so hard to handle and it will really drain you off your energy (from playing and carrying him) and ideas (from thinking of what to do with him next). He has just turned 10 months and now that he is able to almost run in his walker he can really be a handful. He will go all around the house and start pulling things away from their original place or picking them up and then throwing them all over the floor. He will also be opening and closing the cupboards and drawers. He knows how to protest by screaming too.

He has gotten cheekier these days too. It is almost like he knows what he is NOT supposed to do but he still wants to do it anyway and in front of you too. Take for example he will pick something up and he will turn around and look at you and flash his cheeky “mischievous’ smile before throwing the item away. When we tell him ‘No’ he will smile wider or laugh sometimes. We will then pick up the item and put it back to its original place he will repeat the whole routine again.

Isaac and his infamous smile!!

Why the experience you may ask since I have spent days with Isaac before but to me it is a little different this time round because in the past when I am not working it is usually on weekends and we are usually out. The Mrs dislikes staying at home on weekends so you can imagine how she feels now having to bed rest. Hence when we’re out Isaac will be distracted with the surroundings. This time however the Mrs is not going anywhere so we had to remain indoor most of the time.

I am now an Uncle because my Sister had given birth to a healthy and lovely baby, Cate last week. She was having a little problem with breastfeeding Cate and also trying to establish her eating and sleeping routine. By now I imagine things are much better with them.

Lovely Cate!!

I met up with Mike yesterday when we collected our cars from the workshop together and had a quick meal with him. He was telling me how he understands that it is very hard for Kat to handle Kaitlin alone so he gave up more of his ‘me’ time in order to help with taking care of their girl. They had recently hired a maid but she is only charged with the household chores and the two of them alone will handle Kaitlin so this means no more meeting up with his regular kakis for breakfasts on Sundays.

After these few days I am now in a position to advise them that what they are experiencing now is really quite minor. Yes they may have to suffer the lack of sleep in the night since their girls are still infants but to me infants are really much easier to handle since all they do are eat, shit and sleep. I remembered I had quite a bit of ‘me’ time when Isaac was still an infant because he sleeps for 2 to 3 hours straight before it is feeding time and while he slept I was able to play some games on my Xbox. For the record it has been more than 3 months now since I last played any games after having completed GTA4.

I was trying to explain to Mike that between the Mrs, myself, Ani and my parents we are already tired from handling him hence I can’t imagine how are they going to do it on their own months down the road.

It is also through this experience that I can understand a little better what a Stay At Home Mum has to go through on a daily basis. Hats off and salute to you all SAHM. I dare not say I completely understand because I had help from everyone here and there is only just Isaac. Some of you ladies are taking care of more than a toddler and with minimum help.

So if any of your husbands give you crap about them having to work hard outside so they deserve more ‘me’ time or respect then I ask you to dare them to take up the challenge of staying at home alone and care for your kids for a couple of days while you take a break. I am positive they will see you in a different light after their little experience, read nightmare. I know I have. In fact I feel kind of sorry for Ani and was even discussing with the Mrs that we will give her a raise once the twins are out. God knows she deserves it.

So for you new parents or parents-to-be, know this; the infant stage is really just the beginning of worse things to come.

Never seen before, Fierce Isaac!!!!

Muahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!

Home

2008-10-20T16:30:00.004+08:00

A little update on the Mrs and the Twins. They have all been discharged from the hospital as of 14th of this month, last Tuesday after spending a total of 12 days there.

The Mrs couldn’t have been happier and she was waiting impatiently for me to bring her home while I was running around between Dr N’s clinic and the hospital cashier making payments and settling bills.

The entire episode cost us a little over $7,000 and my MediSave covered about $5,000 of it so I paid cash for the remainder. Although being out of the hospital is good for the Mrs it is not entirely easier on the money because she has to be on this injection every other day and only a nurse can administer it for her. The medicine is about $700 for 9 doses which is equivalent to 3 weeks and then there is also the nurse’s fee which was at a staggering high of $80 per trip but the Mrs bargained with her and finally we got it down to $40. So this means we need to spend a little over $1,000 every 3 weeks on this injection alone.

At this point in time we have no idea how long we have to continue with the jabs. Our next review is on the 4th of next month after we go through this extremely detailed scan which took about 2 hours the last time we did it. I believe Dr N will shed some light on the situation by then.

Being home does not mean the Mrs is able to go out and all. Instead she is to be rested in bed as well. Only difference is she will not be as bored since Isaac and I are there. Since Dr N is not sure if the bleeding will happen again we decided that it is best to stay with my parents so that while I am at work at least there will always be someone else at home instead of just Ani. So after checking with my parents all of us including Dino moved in with them.

Moving back in with one’s parents is not as easy as it sounds. Honestly when I heard that the Mrs is for discharged I was only too happy to think about the logistics involved. We are talking about moving the belongings of 2 adults, a maid, a baby and a dog.

Let’s not include the Mrs because besides the daily necessities like home wear and toiletries there is really not much for her since she is not going anywhere.

Dino is also easy since it is effectively only his leash, food, bowl and treats.

Ani is also easy since she has always kept 2 sets of her things. One set at my parents and another at our place so it is a matter of moving more stuffs from one place to another.

Baby is relative easy but since we will be there for the next 5 months at least we moved all his toys and diapers.

I guess the most difficult one would be me since besides the usual home wear and toiletries I still have to bring my work clothes and also going out clothes like the jeans, bermudas and t-shirts. Then there are also the work and going out shoes as well as my flip flops. I too have accessories such as my belts, cuff links and watches.

Then there are other must haves such as our laptops, all 3 of them, my Xbox 360 and also my DVD player along with my SCV decoder and my LCD TV for the bedroom. Luckily these days we can charge our PDA and iPhone using a USB cable and laptop otherwise we have to bring along the respective chargers.

Till date it took me about 6 trips back to my home to bring the items in batches and luckily my place is only 5 mins drive away from my parents’ place. So we started off with bringing over the immediate requirements and every other day Ani and I will head back to bring over the other stuffs.

The best part about all this is to try and fit all our things in a bedroom. The Mrs usually does all the packing and unpacking so while she is not so mobile now, we are living out of a suitcase for the time being. I know it bothers her a bit but I simply do not know where to begin.

Looks like this might turn out to be a rather long 5 months.

Suggestions??

2008-10-13T11:12:00.012+08:00

The below post was actually drafted before the entire bleeding episode hence you can sense the entire tone and mood is a lot lighter. Since it has been drafted I decided to keep the post as it is.

Those of you who know me through this blog should also know that I prefer to open my Christmas presents on Boxing Day itself. Hence we only found out Isaac’s gender on 26th December last year!

This time round with the Twins, I am determined not to ruin the nice surprise but truth be told, it is a lot harder when compared to last time. The ‘problem’ does not lie with me. Since we found out we are having Twins, the main thought on our minds is whether we will get at least a girl in there and the Mrs is really dying to know.

I can literally sense her wavering resistance with each visit to the Gynae and each time she will be looking to me to change my mind. As cruel as it sounds, my stand still remains steadfast. Although I have to respect her wishes and if she really really really wants to know then I have to give in to her as well. Carrying the twins is tough as it is already without me causing her more sleepless nights by denying her wish to know the truth.

My logic for choosing not to know remains the same. What good will it do by knowing now? Of course if there is a girl in there we will be overjoyed but if they are both boys then there is really nothing we can do to change anything anyway. My main concern right now is for her to take good care of herself and the twins since as far as I know twins can be rather fragile even up till the later stages.

Of course choosing not to know has its disadvantages. And as some of you readers have guessed it, we will have problem with the names! As if coming up with a name for each gender is not challenging enough, we now have to torment ourselves by having to come up with 2 names for each gender.

If our naming experience with Isaac is anything to go by then I can say we are having 2 boys this time round as well. Why? Because we have relatively lesser problem with girls’ names compared to boys’ names. So the rule of the thumb is if you are prepared for one gender then God with his wicked sense of humour will reward you with the babies of the other gender.

For the English names we like the following:

Boys:

Hayden (only because this is a unisex name)

Girls:

Hayden
Hayley
Heidi
Emma
Kayla

I do like the following names but the Mrs is not too thrilled with them:

Fabian
Julian
Kyle
Blake
Gabriel

Kale

Even for the Chinese names we are also more of less set on girls’ names while nothing on the boys’. Since Isaac’s middle name is 天 we have decided to continue to use the middle name.

Boys:
天乐 (nothing to do with Louis Khoo)

Girls:

天恩

天敏

Sitting down and breaking the news to my colleagues, we had a fun time coming up with “names” that we definitely cannot use. Coincidentally they are mainly for boys. For the benefit of the non Chinese readers I have listed the meaning.

天才 (Genius – with a name like that we are only setting him up to fail)
天长 (Eternal)
天地 (Heaven and Earth)
天鹅 (Swan – again with a name like that she will be under a lot of pressure)
天父 (Heaven Father – nuff said)
天国 (Paradise; Heaven)
天堂 (Paradise; Heaven)
天花 (Smallpox)
天皇 (Imperial Emperor)
天空 (Sky – hmmmmm…… maybe?!?!)
天亮 (Daylight)
天黑 (Nightfall)
天氣 (Weather)
天上 (Celestial; Heaven)
天使 (Angel – hmmmm….. another maybe?!?!)
天涯 (Ends of Earth)
天桥 (Bridge)
天真 (Naïve; Innocent)
天主 (God)

Jokes aside, I am appealing to you readers once again to come up with names like you did the last time although we ended up using the one Godma picked. This time round it is easier because we do not need it to be 1 or 2 syllables but try and keep it at 3 maximum.

There is one condition though. We are trying to avoid naming the twins from names of the same alphabet which means you can skip “H” for now because if there is a girl we will use either Hayley or Heidi.

Like all the other “contests” and poll on this blog, the only prize the winner receives is bragging rights. This time though you get to name another child that is not one of your own. How cool is that!

Keep the suggestions coming!!

Hospitalised!

2008-10-07T11:00:00.007+08:00

First of all we would like to thank each and every one of you who showed us so much love, support and concern during the past few days. Together you have set a record high for the number of comments received for a single post from readers alone. We really appreciate it and we honestly enjoyed reading all your prayers and well wishes very much. In fact it was perhaps the only highlight for the past few days.

I know you are all very anxious to know the outcome of our episode and also the well being of the twins and the Mrs. I’m sure you can understand the delay in updating this blog.

I do apologise for “making” you readers tear with the last post but I’m sure you know that it was never my intention and I honestly cannot remember any earlier post of mine that resulted in readers crying.

Anyway as with most life experiences there will always be good and bad news. The good news here is the twins and the Mrs are all doing fine. I like to think of it as the twins having heard their mummy’s cries in the A & E ward, hung on and stayed with mummy. Then there is of course your prayers. No matter what religion you are from I believed that your high being answered your prayers. Thanks again for that!

On Saturday evening Dr N came and finally removed the gauze in the Mrs and I was shocked to learn that about a metre of it was stuffed in her to add pressure to stop the bleeding. While he was pulling it out slowly our fingers were crossed that it will reveal minimum blood. True enough it had very little blood on it and better still after it was out there was no sign of any bleeding.

It has been another 2 days and by now we can safely say that the bleeding had stopped but to play it save Dr N wants to keep the Mrs in the hospital till she delivers, this is the bad news!!

The Mrs was so depressed when she heard the news that she was crying even till last night. Being in the hospital with her for the past 4 days I can fully understand her reluctance to stay for such a long period. Being bored is one thing but the main thing here is her missing Isaac. She hates the idea of missing out on his growing up such as his first steps, first word and birthday etc.

I remembered very clearly the dejected look on her when she was wheeled from the intensive care unit to the normal ward on Sunday night. I believed it was reality sinking in that she has to stay here for the next 4 months or so. She understands that it was for hers as well as the twins own good but it still did not proved to be easy.

Besides Isaac and boredom there is also the money issue. Based on a very brief calculation, a 4 month stay will cost over 20K. From this episode I also realized that all general health and life insurance policies do not cover pregnancy related matters. There are specific women only policies to tackle this kind of thing and although the Mrs bought one for herself, the coverage for hospital stay is only about 5K. So if you have to take away something from this experience of ours then go out there and invest a little more in such women policies before you plan to have your next kid. And if you are planning for IVF then all the more you should have this type of insurance in place since having multiple babies will have high chance of complications.

Secretly we are harbouring this little hope that Dr N will allow her home after another week or two. We derived this from what he said to her yesterday. He said that everything is looking up so far but he wants to keep her there for another week and then we take it from there. We like to interpret it as after another week or two and if everything remains status quo then maybe just maybe we can have her bed rest at home instead.

Speaking of home, I was in bed last night and it suddenly dawned on me that the house seemed emptier without the Mrs. Although Ani and Isaac were sleeping in the next room without the Mrs, the house just felt empty. Even the bed felt so empty and no, I am not trying to imply that you are fat Darling. Without the Mistress around the house just feels weird.

Currently we have worked out a schedule and system to allow the Mrs to enjoy a few hours with Isaac on a daily basis. With him around her mood has definitely been improving.

To end this on a lighter note below are a few pictures of our pride and joy, Isaac.

A little blury but you can see he weighs about 9.26kg now.

Not sure if the old folks will scold for letting Isaac sleep on hospital bed.

A little close up on our Plus Size baby.

Prayers!!

2008-10-03T10:10:00.011+08:00

I am writing this post from the delivery suite at Mount Elizabeth (Mt. E) hospital as the Mrs lies in bed trying to get some shuteye. The feeling is so different when compared to 9 months back when we were eagerly anticipating Isaac's arrival.

See what happened was at 2am this morning the Mrs got woken up when she felt as if she had wet herself in bed. She checked immediately and found blood on herself as well as on the bed sheet. She went to the bathroom to investigate and once confirmed that she was bleeding she woke me up immediately.

Since it wasn’t too much blood then we thought we could wait till the morning before we rush down to see Dr N. However after about 10 minutes she felt that she was still bleeding and upon checking she confirmed that the amount is getting a little alarming. Her sanitary pad was soaked! We wasted no time in getting changed and headed for the A&E department at Mt E.

We did not utter a word to each other and I believed that was probably due to us preparing ourselves mentally for the worst case scenario. So many thoughts went through my mind. How was I going to remain strong for the both of us and continue to give her support and encouragement? How do I console her if something bad did happen to the twins? What had caused this bleeding? Did anything happen to her yesterday? Was it something she ate?

The drive to the hospital was eerily silent with the both of us deep in thoughts. Since I did not know how to reassure her with words at that point in time I can only place my hand on her thigh and gave her a reassuring pat.

I had the shock of my life and realized for the first time how serious the bleeding was once we arrived at the carpark of Mt. E. As soon as she stepped out of the car and stood up the blood started to gush out. She was literally dripping and within seconds a small pool of blood was formed on the floor between her legs. I told her to stand and lean against the car while I ran in and got the nurse to bring a wheelchair for her.

See the pool of blood? This was only after like 15 seconds!!

What happened next was about an hour of agonizing wait for Dr N to come and check on her. The lucky thing was he was performing a C Section just upstairs at about 2.30 in the morning so he was with us as soon as he was done. In the meantime we were left to contemplate the possibilities. The Mrs was crying non stop and I will never forget the words that she muttered to the twins continuously, “Babies please stay with mummy!”

What wouldn’t I trade for the safety of my wife and my two unborn children?

The next hour or so was the frantic fight by Dr N in trying to stop the bleeding. According to him the Mrs looked like she had lost about 800 – 900ml of blood already and the bleeding was coming from the lower of the 2 placentas.

The Mrs was a real trooper. She was jabbed, had both her hands on drip and so many things were going on at her private but she never once complained of any pain or discomfort although we could tell from her face it was really quite painful. I believed that she only wanted the nurses and Dr N to get on and do their best without any distraction from her.

What Dr N did was to insert some gauze into the Mrs to add pressure and stop the bleeding. Since the bleeding is internal we do not know for certain if it has stopped. In Dr N's own words, we're not out of the woods yet. We will probably only know for sure sometime tomorrow evening or Sunday morning. According to him we have to pray for two things now; 1 - the bleeding must stop and 2 - the Mrs must not get any infection. She was already given antibiotics to prevent infections but as for the bleeding, it is in God’s hands now.

Wanting to find out what was the worst scenario I asked Dr N if one or both the twins are in danger and he explained that should the bleeding continue, his priority will be to save the Mrs hence both the twins will have to be aborted!!! Both our hearts sank when we heard that.

Scans were made to check on the twins’ wellbeing and heartbeats and they were doing just fine. Seeing them kicking and moving in there I really hate to even consider the idea of having to abort them. It will be really tough to pull the plug on them when they are still behaving so well in there!

Once the Mrs had settled down and resting, I had to rush home to settle a few things and make a few calls to the family. My eyes will tear up each time I inform them that the twins are in danger and might not make it, just like my eyes are all teared up while typing this now.

In this dark hour, I hope you will include us in your prayers!!