Enrichment

I have always viewed ourselves as pretty relaxed parents except for a couple of things. Some will probably view us as lazy but ultimately I would like them to enjoy their childhood hence I am not too big on all the enrichment classes and flash cards etc. Honestly I prefer for them to learn at their own pace instead of us forcing it down their throats. They can only have one childhood so I would like to make it a nice one for them.

I was having lunch with my sis yesterday and she was asking me about the pictures of Isaac in my previous post. “What was he doing with the mop?” she asked. So I went on to describe to her how he is now mimicking us when we go about our business at home. Mopping the floor and putting the laundry in the washing machine are just two examples that I managed to capture with my iPhone. Off hand I can recall another incident where he actually took a piece of the tissue and climb on the sofa which is against a glass wall and started wiping the glass. According to my sis we are training him under the Montessori Method without realizing it.

It seems the Montessori Method basically involves showing him repeatedly how things are done while he observes and then he will repeat the action later on his own. This is followed by us praising and encouraging him. He is now at the age whereby he is very observant towards the things that we do. Take another example, he is always watching very closely whenever I put him in his car seat or any high chair and buckle him down. Although I believe he has an ulterior motive for he is trying to figure out how it is done so he can free himself.

After taking those pictures and video I was discussing with the Mrs that instead of him throwing his toys and make a racket at home, we should look into playing with him using house chores. Things that will still be interesting to him and he can work on his motor skill and creativity at the same time.

I have always been a skeptic of all the classes that will turn your child into a genius with exceptional memory or a linguist or the next Mozart. I believe there is about 1 out of hundreds if not thousands that will achieve such results and I think that kid is already born gifted to begin with. These schools will naturally profile on those kids that are good and deemed a success but I always wonder if anyone asks the parents of the tens or hundreds of kids that attended the same training method but yield no amazing result. Surely we must know somebody who knows somebody that sent their kids to the Glenn Doman and the Shichida classes. Maybe you can enlighten me. Do they all achieve such fantastic result? In the event that the kids turn out normal and not exceptional, what then is their excuse? That we parents are not working hard enough on them? That we are not consistent or dedicated enough? Or maybe these kids just need that couple more semesters with them.

But please don’t get me wrong for I am not against sending the young to enrichment classes. At the end of the day such classes are there to help make them better. The Mrs and I are currently looking at sending Isaac for “fun and educational” classes too (any suggestions by the way?) but our intention is not to turn him into a genius. All I want is for him to have an hour or two of fun where he can learn to socialize and learn to do something things with his hands (maybe even feet) and imagination. What we are NOT trying to achieve is to make him that much smarter than the kid next to him so that he will finish higher in class. Whatever class we decide to attend is also to provide us with a chance to bond and do things together with Isaac.

Part of our reason for sending Isaac for such once a week class is also to prepare him for the nursery comes January. We are hoping that being in such a “classroom” environment will soften the culture shock that he will surely experience when he has to attend the nursery. Some of you might remember that I had to struggle with the idea of sending him to nursery next year. To me he is still very much a baby so surely classes and schools can wait. However the Mrs convinced me that he is not attending a class per se. Instead I should think of it as sending him to play and socialize with other kids his age rather than having stay cooped up at home and not learning much. Anyway it is only for 2 hours a day so I can live with that.

Anyway I was so excited after speaking to my sis about the Montessori Method that I went over to Borders and Books Kinokuniya after work that very same day to see if I could pick up a book or two on it. Most of them are rather dry and describes the science behind the method but I am glad I managed to find one that sounds interesting and direct enough.

I am not a speed reader and plus the fact that I am so busy with so many things you will have to be patient if you want my book review and update on Isaac's progress.

Handful!!

Life has been pretty nice but mundane lately. It is usually work and then rush home to be with the kids by about 6 plus and then what follows is probably the most tiring part of the day for me.
See, while the children are nice to us, they sleep by 9pm and will not need our attention till the next morning when we go to work, it can be hard handling 3 of them for that 2 hours or so.

Once we’re home after dinner at my dad’s place, Ani will be doing her chores and that leaves the 2 of us to handle the 3 of them. Although the twins are still pretty much lying around only but they can be cranky at times for they sometimes need that little nap of about half hour and with Isaac creating all the rackets they will protest violently.

Although only 2 hours but it is still pretty demanding physically or maybe it only applies to me, the out of shape father. I know, I know some of you may argue when have I ever been in shape.

Isaac is at this age whereby he knows no fear and also no boundaries. He will open all doors and drawers as well as pick up any and everything. Worst of all he will get tired of whatever is in his hands and he will drop it (read throw) like a hot brick within minutes. Hence besides looking out for his safety I also need to look after the many remote controls, handphones, digital cameras and laptops in our room.

As he is able to climb up and down from our bed now we also have to take extra care that he doesn’t slip and fall or sit on his defenseless siblings. Being the sweet big brother that he is, he will occasionally decide to show some affection towards the twins by patting them but with a little too much strength sometimes.

So during these two hours it is a lot of getting up and down and running after Isaac. Whenever the twins are cooperative we will be able to sit down and read with Isaac or watch some educational kids’ videos on YouTube. This will keep his butt planted for a while.

Sometimes, thankfully this doesn’t happen often, both twins want to be fed around the same time and it will be impossible for us to watch after Isaac so Ani will be called in to watch over him for a while.

Once the twins are fed, they will normally sleep soon after and then it will be Isaac’s turn to be fed and tugged in bed. Nowadays with the twins sleeping early the Mrs has the chance to coax him to sleep. I believe this is the time of the day that she looks forward to the most. I know she really appreciates the opportunity to have this little quiet and bonding time with Isaac.

Now if the way Isaac behaves is a preview of what we are to expect from the twins then I am worried. Friends have been pretty generous with their compliments on how well we are coping with the 3 of them now but I like to remind them that the hardest is yet to come. I truly believe that it will be much harder once they are about Isaac’s age now.

While I am bracing myself for that inevitable I am also secretly wishing that by then Isaac will be old enough to understand things and reason with. Wishful thinking? I don’t know, you experienced mothers tell me.

Right now we are enjoying whatever ‘me’ and ‘us’ time that the children have generous granted us. With all of them asleep by 9 plus we do have some time to do our own readings or finishing the serial that we like, in my case True Blood. Oh did I mention that all these were done in the comfort of our own bedroom and on our bed? The twins have no issues (knock on wood) with us switching on the lights and TV once they are sound asleep.

We can even squeeze in a night of Mahjong with the two of us playing at the same time, although this is only done occasionally. All we need to do is set up the trusted baby monitor and be on high alert but so far (knock on wood again) they can still sleep through the night. Lucky us? I definitely think so!

I know many of you readers miss Isaac so below are some of the latest pictures and a video of him helping out at home.

From the video you can see that Isaac was really struggling whether to wash the clothes or not. I think part of the reason besides the weather is the load.

When Isaac is not busy with the laundry he likes to keep the floor clean so that he and in the near future his siblings can crawl around safely.

Smile!!

The twins are at the stage where they know how to smile already and sometimes if we are lucky we might just catch them chuckle too. This is a little hard to achieve for we need them to be in the right mood.

The babies' smile is really something that is very heartwarming. No matter how tired we are after a hard day’s work their smile will somehow take it all away. So what we do these days is to pop our face close to theirs and then call them by their names with an animated tone of voice of course and they will give you that sweetest smile. With Hayley I always call “Baby Hayley! Hayley Baby!” whereas nothing much rhymes with Luke so it is just “Luke Luke!” Pronounced as “look look”. Although simple but it works just as well on him.

Besides evenings, their smile will also brighten our day when they flash it at us first thing in the morning. It is a very nice thing to see them stretch themselves, yawn and then when they see you they’ll flash that toothless smile. It is mornings like these that make me want to skip work and spend more time with them. No wait…….. that could be my lazy bug actually.

For whatever reason I seemed to be more successful in getting the twins to chuckle and coo with me. Sometimes I will change them after their night feed and while they are lying on the changing table I will make funny faces and play with them. This will sometimes lead to them chuckling. The Mrs while feeding the other twin will stretch her neck out to see what is going on and how I managed to do that.

Just the other day she was wondering aloud why is it that I can get them to chuckle while she can’t. She concluded that it could be due to the fact that she is more concerned about how much milk they are taking whereas I am happy just feeding and playing with them. Typical man? Perhaps.

From my observation there seems to be this jealousy / competition thing going on between parents. Things such as which parent the child will learn to call first or who will the child run to first when both parents come home together. This is happening to friends and family around us hence I believe this applies to you all too. I’m sure it is all done in good humor. For your information we sometimes do this with Dino too.

Honestly I may tease the Mrs a little here and there whenever I succeeded in making the babies laugh or do something different but I really will have no issue if she can get the babies to do stuffs that I can’t or even if they learn to address her first. Take for example she taught Isaac to point to his own head whenever we ask “Who is the bad boy?” and also shakes his head whenever we ask “Is Isaac a handsome boy?” What she taught him is still providing us with hours of fun which is the key thing here hence it is not really important who taught him that. If only he is more consistent and not get distracted so easily I’m sure more people will get to experience and enjoy it.

Speaking of Isaac he is still having that infamous cheeky smile of his and in fact he is getting more mischievous although he is still a good boy most of the time. It is just that it is getting harder to bring him along whenever we meet friends for lunch or dinner. He just wouldn’t sit still for long. In the past we are able to pacify him with food but these days this method will not last long. Before you know it he wants to be off the baby chair and move about on his own. As a result if we have to bring the kids out with us then more often than not we will bring the twins instead of Isaac.

I guess we will just have to wait for him to turn older and maybe can reason better and then it will be the twins’ turn to stay at home while we bring Isaac out for meetings with friends.

In case reading this post does not bring that smile to your face then I have the following video that might just do the trick.

Needs??

It is the exciting time of the year again. The Great Singapore Sale!! Not sure if you all noticed but the commencement of this sales period seems to be getting earlier with each year. Some shops are even offering pre-GSS sale.

Anyway the Mrs seems to be quite excited this year now that she has 3 babies to fill those clothes with. What’s even more exciting for her is this year we have a baby girl to doll up.

Babies aside this is usually the time when the Mrs looks around for a bargain on some of the designers bags that she has been eyeing for some time. Credit to her for she has no problem waiting for such sales before committing on the bags and wallets. I definitely cannot say the same about me. I am the typically impatient male where I will not even wait for another day if it means a saving of 10% by borrowing a membership card from friends. I’ll usually look at the price and deduced that the saving of 10% is not worth the wait so more often than not I will end up paying for the retail price.

Anyway the Mrs already proclaimed that she is on the prowl for 2 designer bags which she intends to use for work. She has already gotten one from TOD’s and she is still on the lookout for a second one although not too wholeheartedly. This is the ‘problem’ with her because once she has spent a certain amount of money it is harder for her to commit on another item. Knowing her character I will usually be more encouraging whenever she wants to buy anything.

I was having this conversation with my bro, Mike the other day that the same usually cannot be said for the wives. Case in point, I have always wanted to buy a home theater system but due to the lack of wireless speakers I have been putting it on hold. That was until recently when I came across a promotion on a Panasonic one which includes a Blu-ray player. There was an almost 37% discount and I was getting really excited but the Mrs’s response was “Do we really need it? You seldom watch your movies in the living room anyway.” To be fair to her she was pointing out the truth but I imagine that scenario will be easily changed once I get my hands on the system.

Back to the conversation with Mike;

Mike: How? Are you buying the Panasonic system?

Me: The Mrs asks if we really need it leh. She commented that I hardly watch TV in the living as it is.

Mike: Ya but that is because you don’t have the system there mah.

Me: Somehow we husbands are more supportive when it comes to encouraging them to buy whatever they want.

Mike: Ya but we are so supportive because we hope that they will in turn be just as supportive when it comes to our purchases.

Me: Imagine if we ask them do they really need those new bags, shoes or wallets.

Mike: Ohhhhh…. Bro, you don’t want to go down that road!

Both: Hahahahahaha

Mike is experiencing pretty much the same thing with his intention to purchase. He was using the buying of more camera lens for his new hobby and DSL as an example and he knows for a fact that Kat, his wife will definitely ask does he need so many lenses.

The four of us were out having lunch and shopping when I told the Mrs that most of us buy stuffs base on our wants and only a small percentage of our purchases are really based on our needs.

Speaking of lunch I learned another thing about wives and purchases. I commented the other day that actually I was hoping to buy us both a new pair of wedding bands so we were looking around and I told her that I actually like the Bvlgari classic B.Zero1 ring for sometime now so if it looks good on us both then we will buy them. We went ahead to try but it looks better on me than her so we did not purchase them.

She encourages me to buy it for myself first while we continue to source for another ring for her. The strange thing here is it actually costs more than the home theater system that I wanted to buy. Then I came to the conclusion that maybe with the system we are not speaking the same language but with jewellery she understands my want much better!

If you think this post is about our voicing our dissatisfaction towards our wives then nothing is further from the truth. At the end of the day our wives will not really say no to our needs and wants since they know how hard we work and they understand that sometimes even guys just want to pamper ourselves a little. I believe in every marriage they are there to be our check and balance and we all love them for that.

Now Honey can I buy the home theater system and the ring?

Courageous?

Wow!!! Has it been more than 2 weeks since I last posted here?!?! How time flies especially when you have 3 kids and work as well as other stuffs that you have to work on. I know my bro has always been reminding me whenever he meets me that my blog needs updating but it never quite occurred to me that it has been this long.

Besides the usual excuse of being busy I guess there is nothing much worth updating from the Tan family. Everything has been pretty much same-o same-o and mundane.

As parents I believe the Mrs and I are pretty relaxed and courageous (some say stupid) at the same time. Most people would have agreed when they see that we tried conceiving so soon after Isaac but I have different thing in mind.

About 2 weeks back when the twins turned 3.5 months we brought them to Dr B for their routine check up. She has always been the rather relaxed doctor and the instructions she gave was for us to bring the twins to her when they are 3 or 4 months old.

Hmmmm…. Now which should it be? 3 months old or 4 months old? Finally I decided to bring them in when they’re 3.5 months old. Typical of a dad right? That was an easy enough decision.

So on that fateful day both the Mrs and I took childcare leaves and the Tan family headed to Dr B’s clinic. Isaac and Ani came along of course. Isaac was due for his 15th month checkup and we were already late for that. Blame it on the government (typical of a Singaporean right?) for not giving us 6 days of childcare leave for each kid. As a result we have to time their visits to the doctor to be on the same day.

Bringing all the children to the PD for their routine checkup at the same time is all good and fine but what we forgot was Isaac was also due for his jabs. Now don’t ask me what he had because if there is one thing I am not following, it is the injections. I have totally lost track of what he had and will be having. I normally leave it to the good PD and the ever reliable record book.

Anyway imagine my surprise when I learnt that besides the twins Isaac needs to be jabbed too. While the twins were required to have their 6 in 1 jabs, their big brother needed 3 jabs!!! Dr B said that there were 3 outstanding jabs for Isaac but she would only recommend that he takes 2 of them that day leaving the 3rd one till when he comes back in another few months time. The best part was the silly old me was thinking “Sure! What is a 2 in 1 jab when the twins are having 6 in 1 right? I mean come on, while we’re at it why not give him all 3 in 1 and get it over and done with?”

When things were finally explained to me and after I had my blonde moment I actually looked at Isaac and felt sorry for him. I wondered if he will be traumatized by this episode considering some adults already have problem with handling a single jab to the arm let alone 2?!?!?!

The next wave of awakening hit me and I suddenly realized that with all 3 kids are getting their jabs on the same day, we will really have a handful should all of them develop fever. We were smart enough to always arrange for the jabs to take place on a Friday so that we have the weekend to take care of the kids but no weekend is long enough should all 3 of them develop fever!!

Being the relaxed and courageous (again some say stupid) parents that we are we went ahead with all jabs for all kids.

First up was Isaac and being the big brother that he is he showed his younger siblings how it should be done. I was wondering how were they going to administer both injections because Isaac will probably reject the second one right? The answer became clear when I saw Dr B and a nurse holding one syringe each. One of them aiming for Isaac’s arm whiles the other the thigh. They synchronized it to perfection (in my opinion definitely a gold medal is due) and all we heard from Isaac was “erh!” and then Dr B quickly shoved a toy in his hands and he went off playing! He took it like a real man there! I couldn't have done better myself. Really!

Luke faired better than Isaac when he had his 6 in 1 because he did not cry at all but Hayley being the girl in the family and the manja one cried a lot more but she too forgot about the pain in a couple of minutes.

For the rest of the weekend we were very vigilant, patrolling their rooms armed with our trusted Cadi thermometer.

Maybe the kids know that their parents are inexperience and courageous (some say stupid) they decided to be kind on us for they did not have any side effects of any kind. Either that or they took pity on us for the damage to us were probably more severe than them as the bill came up to about S$700 for that day.

After this experience will we have all 3 kids take their injections on the same day? ABSOLUTELY!!

Switched

I read with interest an article published in the Today newspaper today about how a pair of girls were switched at birth in the hospital and had led their separate and happy lives for 56 years. They have only just discovered the truth.

This is nothing new of course as I have read a couple of such stories before but it always brings to my mind a burning question. What if Isaac was switched at birth too?

Note: The following is only a hypothetical question that I played around in my mind. There is no evidence to suggest that I should be concerned or should think otherwise. I am only using Isaac as an example and this is just something that I am curious to know how will parents react in general.

I had wanted to do a post on this topic but never quite gotten down to doing it so today's article is a timely reminder especially when I am running out of things to post about.

I remembered asking the Mrs when Isaac was only a few months old what will she do if the hospital rang one day to inform us of their mistake. What if Isaac actually belongs to someone else and our baby had been raised by another couple for the past few months?

The Mrs brushed my question aside can called me ‘Seow’ (mad in hokkien) for bringing up this ridiculous question. I suspect deep down she did not know what her own answer might be hence the easiest thing to do is to brush me and my nonsense aside.

Honestly till today I am still pondering and trying to find my own answer. What do I do? Do I return Isaac and welcome my own boy with open arms? Do I tell the other couple that let’s just continue raising each other’s boy and continue to keep in touch to witness the growth and progress of our own boys? Will the other party even contemplate such a bizarre request?

I hope you realize that as the days go by the answer to my lingering question is harder to answer. As we spend more time with Isaac it will be harder to let him return to his rightful parents for sure. Looking at the flip side does this also mean that the decision should be easier? Since it is so hard to say goodbye then surely it will be easier to just continue with this mistake right?

This would be the case if we take our own child out of the equation. We are only looking at it from keeping Isaac point of view. Surely this will not be so easy if you know that your own flesh and blood is still out there raise by another couple. It will most probably be made worse if you get to see your actual child. Will you then be able to tell yourself to continue with this mistake and prey and hope that the other party continues to take excellent care of your child?

Honestly as of today I am still at a lost as to what will I do so I am curious to know how will you, fellow parents react. What will you do? Do you know of something similar happening to people around you? It certainly is an interesting topic to think about isn’t it? But please do not spend too much time dwelling on it and definitely do not scare your spouse into thinking you know something that they don’t and as a result causing a family panic.

The only thing I know for sure is I will sue the hospital till the cow comes home!!

Let’s just treat this as something that we toy around and scare ourselves with for surely this cannot happen right?

Then again try telling the 56 year old ladies that……..

Progress

As much as I like to keep you all posted on the progress of the twins and Isaac I have been rather tied up with work plus life is getting a little mundane hence nothing interesting to write about.

The most exciting thing is Isaac finally walking. This happened about one and a half weeks ago. All along he was showing signs that he will be walking soon but he just did not take that 1st step. He always chose to go back down on his fours and crawl. One Tuesday after work when we got to my parents' place we saw him standing and walking rather unsteadily. Since then he has been walking around non stop and he has improved a lot within a week and he is walking pretty fast now. Most will comment that he is a little slow since he was about 16 months old when he walked but we're not concerned.

Another very good development is that the twins are finally joining the STC. For the past few nights both of them have been absolute angels. Having their last feed at about 9pm and going off to sleep usually between 10 and 11 plus. They will normally wake up at about 6 plus for their breakfast. Last night was amazing. Luke had his feed at 8 plus slept at 9 plus and did not wake up till we had to send him to his grandpa's at about 8am. It sure looks like they are very much like Isaac in this sense. The downside of course is they are not drinking as much milk as they should be but according to the PD so long as they are still gaining the right amount of weight then it is fine.

Speaking of weight gain, the twins seemed to be doing better than expected especially for Luke as you can tell from the picture below. The rule of the thumb is twice the birth weight by 6 months and about three times by the time they turn 12 months. As of now Luke is already about 5.8kg and Hayley at about 5kg with their birth weight at 2.4kg and 1.9kg respectively. It sure looks like the twins have caught up quite a bit.

Luke being the stronger one is able to flip himself now. In fact he fell off his mattress 2 nights ago. Luckily their bed is only a thick mattress on the floor so no damage was done. Looking back now it is a little funny because when we heard him cry the Mrs walked to the mattress but could not see him on it. She was shocked and asked where he was. Before I could switch on the lights the Mrs found him lying on the floor. Luckily she did not step on him.

As I had mentioned in my last post Luke likes to sleep on his tummy and because of this he has developed the strength to lift his head and hold it for a few seconds. These days his legs and body are also stronger he is able to push with his leg and twist his body and as a result he will be lying face up. Between the two of them Luke is the one that covers most of the bed when he sleeps. He will actually crawl and rotate as he sleeps so we will always find him in a different position and facing each morning. Sometimes at night Hayley will complain when Luke invade her territory with one of his limb touching her. One would think that they would have gotten used to sleeping and banging against each other by now right?

Anyway back to our mundane life. Each day it is really just work and rush home to be with the kids. Have dinner at my parents' place before we head home. Usually it is this time at home that is the most tiring. Ani has to do the house work so it is down to the Mrs and I to watch over the 3 of them. If the twins are sleeping quietly then it is no problem but this is almost never the case because Isaac being in the same room will cause too much racket that it will be impossible for the twins to sleep. We even tried putting the twins in a separate room but to no avail.

So somehow we managed to pacify the twins and at the same time keep Isaac occupied until Ani is done with her work. She will then feed Isaac and put him to sleep by 9 plus. Now that the twins are sleeping earlier it also means more free time for us. Soon I will be able to go onto MSN and Facebook at night so look out for me ya?

I know I owe it to many of you so here are some of the latest pictures of the twins and Isaac.

So can you tell if I'm Hayley or Luke?

With my picture you can tell for sure right?

See how happy Isaac is with his siblings?

"What do you think they're up to now?"

"Now I'm certain no one will mistaken me as a boy anymore!"

"HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!"