Pills

I think I will be very well prepared when it comes to coaxing Baby to swallow any pill in the future because the Mrs is giving me enough practices now.

It all started about 2 months back when both of us were all excited that we are pregnant so we went around looking for things that we might need such as vitamins.

The sales staff at one of these shops advised that the Mrs could actually start on the multi-vitamins as well as DHA. So we happily bought 1 bottle each and if I remembered correctly the cost is probably around S$60 / S$70.

Unfortunately the multi-vitamins pills are rather large, a little larger than the Panadol extra and the Mrs had problem swallowing it. She tried taking it the morning after we bought it but just could not wash it down with a glass of water and after much struggle she finally did.

So the next morning we thought of breaking, actually more like chopping which resulted in scratches on my kitchen table top, it into two. Since it was smaller so naturally it would be easier to swallow right? Wrong! We chopped it into halves right down the middle but the edges were rough so the Mrs complained that it was just as difficult to swallow them.

I was thinking of breaking it into even smaller pieces but she protested that the smaller pieces will have even more rough edges so we gave up.

Then there is also the story about the DHA. I never quite get why should pills have flavour because one is not expected to suck on it but merely swallow it within a few seconds of placing it in the mouth. Anyway the Mrs chose the Strawberry flavoured ones but due to the traumatic experience from swallowing the multi-vitamins, even Strawberry flavour could not help. In fact she complained that the Strawberry tasted awful. Arghhhh.......!

To be fair to her, she was having all day sickness then so all the throwing up did not help matter and made things easier for her as well. So in the end both bottles of vitamins minus 2 pills each are still sitting in my kitchen gathering dust. I was waiting for the Mrs to feel better and hopefully change her mind about taking them again but it has been 2 months.

So we were at Dr N's office before the weekend and he asked if she is taking her vitamins and not wanting to let this window of opportunity slipped by, I happily volunteered that she refuses to take them. Looking back now, I seemed quite evil right? Selling out the Mrs. Mua ha ha ha!!!!

Please don't misunderstand for I will have no problem with the Mrs not taking any vitamin pills if not for her low blood pressure. Now that she is pregnant, she gets occasional dizzy spells and one of the way to improve things could be to increase her calcium intake so Dr N prescribed some calcium tablets for her along with other vitamins. Since it will be beneficiary for both Baby and her to have these vitamins and supplements, I feel she has to try and take her pills.

Over the weekend I had forgotten to remind her to take her vitamins and she happily and conveniently "forgot" about it too when they were in her bag all along. But yesterday I remembered and since I am on long term medication myself (actually wrote about this and will post it very shortly) I decided to put her medication right next to mine. There is no chance of me forgetting now since I am very disciplined when it comes to taking my own medications.

Last night was interesting. When the Mrs was getting ready to sleep, she saw me coming out from the shower and went straight to the kitchen to take my medication. In her heart she must have known that I will return with hers as well and true enough I reappeared with a glass of water and even though she could not see her "gigantic" pill she knew immediately there was no escaping this time. She cringed and gave me the resentful look for remembering and worst of all for enforcing that she must take it.

She kept insisting that she will vomit after taking the pill so I made her a deal. If she could not swallow the pill successfully with the glass of water, I will throw away the entire bottle. I had to remind her that she could swallow 2 of the round Panadols at one go in the past so this should be easy. I had to take those Panadols one at a time. Well all the drama led to nothing cause she used about half a glass of water to down the pill and after that she complained that it was stuck in her chest. At that point I can really see Baby telling me the same thing in the future: "but Daddy, its stuck here! Really! It’s stuck! I can't get it down!"

She has to take another pill in the morning and you should see her resentment all over again when she saw me preparing it. I thought after last night, it will be easier but maybe apparently she still needs coaxing and reassuring. As we do not have warm water in the morning she promised she will take it in her office. I called her around noon to remind her and she took it obediently about 10 minutes later and smsed me with the news proudly. Of course there has to be complaints. This time the pill was black and bitter!

Well as long as she takes her pills, I can handle all her "pill being stuck" and "pill is bitter" complaints.

Hmmm.... maybe we can start her back on her DHA soon.

HypnoBirthing

The Mrs and I went for a HypnoBirthing “taster” recently. It was very strange because a couple of weeks ago, we were just commenting that we were not comfortable going for this method. Personally it seemed a little too “Hocus Pocus” to me. We had decided to only go for the usual Antenatal classes to prepare ourselves better on what to expect and do during and after labour but how that one and half hour changed things. Although I am sure it has not changed our perspective a hundred percent but after learning more about it we are comfortable enough to want to give it a try.

What I got from the “taster” was HypnoBirthing is mainly trying to change one’s perspective on child labour. Like millions of people out there my image of child labouring is a hot and sweaty mum whose face is all red and cringed up and all the while trying her hardest to push the baby out of her system. Maybe some vulgarities will be hurled here and there, now and then. Meanwhile the husband not knowing what else to do is trying to act and stay as calm as possible and saying encouraging words to the poor woman.

You know, I have always felt that a woman’s ultimate way of showing her love for a guy is to agree to give birth for him. This image will give you a rough idea what she has to go through hence enforcing my view.

Well, it seems it doesn't have to be this way anymore. Apparently mothers can get into her own comfortable position be it squatting, sitting or even standing when she is trying to “breathe” her baby out. So much for showing her ultimate love huh?!

I believe the first and most important part about HypnoBirthing is to change your way of looking at child birth. Once you truly believe that it can be done with minimum or almost no pain and shortened labour then half the battle is worn and the rest of it is to apply what you have learned and put into practice. A little easier said then done right? We’ll let you know months later.

Anyway it seems a lot of work has to be put into practicing on one’s breathing and relaxing during the prenatal stage. The mums have to learn to ride the waves of “Surges” aka contractions. The theory of HypnoBirthing is actually not all “Hocus Pocus” but rather scientific. A relax mum will naturally be able to relax all her muscles including those essential for labour and generate better blood flow hence reducing pain and shorten labour.

We also watched some videos of babies being born and that sort of freaked the Mrs out. One of the video showed the baby’s head coming out all purple (blue to me) and the Gynae slowing guiding and turning it when all the while the mum was breathing calmly. Within a couple of minutes the rest of the baby was out too and then the mum was shown to be giggling and laughing. Nope, no screaming and cursing were heard.

I have to say that some of the positions that the mums were in seemed a little unorthodox to me. I told the Mrs that her mum will surely freaked out if she sees her kneeling down on the floor during the early stages of labour.

Power has certainly been shifted back to the mothers when it comes to giving birth. No more going with the flow and simply obeying what the Gynae and nurses dictate. With knowledge mothers are better prepared to decide for themselves what kind of birth they want including how and when they want it. I’m sure this will prove to provide headaches for some Gynaes and hospitals that are a little less experimental and more conservative.

The Mrs is worried that it will all be a waste of money if she fails at the last hurdle and ask for Epidural. I told her that it will not happen because I will be there and I will tell the nurses that she is well trained in HypnoBirthing so she can manage. She is just panicking. No, seriously if she has to use drugs then so be it. I’m sure she is not the first and neither will she be the last. She’ll just have to put the breathing and relaxation technique to use in her daily life in the future.

Right now just know that I cannot make her meow like a cat or quack like a duck when she is "Hypnotised".

Confinement

The one thing on our minds now is what are we going to do with the confinement.

There are many options out there but the only 3 available to us at this point in time are:

1) To hire a live-in maid and the Mrs will do her own confinement with the maid's help

2) To move in with her mum for the first month since she has a wealth of experience and also a maid

3) To simply do our own confinement with my help and no maid

Personally I prefer for the Mrs to do her confinement at home because this way I can spend more time with her and Baby. I am not able to stay there with her because besides my mum-in-law (MIL), there are also other occupants such as my dad-in-law, brother-in-law with his wife, their baby and a maid, Lily, living there. All 3 rooms are already occupied. Furthermore I have to go home and feed our dog also.

The Mrs would like to do it at home too because she cannot imagine not being able to shower for a month. My MIL is very particular about this. She has 3 daughters-in-law and all of them had to skip showers. They were only allowed to wipe themselves with wet cloths.

Actually there was this incident that was rather amusing. When my 2nd SIL who is a Canadian gave birth here years ago, my MIL told her that she could not shower when she got home. A Sister Nurse happened to pass by heard her comment, came in and demanded to know who said that. She was rather fierce and she chided everyone in the room that my 2nd SIL must be allowed to shower.

Anyway back to us. We are leaning more towards option 3. If we can do without a maid then it will be good as we get to keep our privacy and at the same time save some money. We are thinking of bringing Baby to my MIL's place and she and Lily can help look after both Baby and my nephew who is 6 months old. Then we will pick Baby up and go home everyday after work. This is subject to my BIL's agreeing of course since he hired Lily to look after his own son.

If this can be arranged then we do not have to hire a maid (but will pay Lily extra for her help) then the only outstanding thing is the confinement.

Actually I feel our main problem is with food for the Mrs because as it is she has not been doing housework for sometime already. No, I'm not complaining Dear.

We have a part-time helper who comes in twice a week to clean the place and iron her clothes. All my shirts and pants are sent out for ironing. Yes, I can't iron very well. T-shirts and Polo-Tees no problem but work shirts is another matter altogether. The throwing of clothes into the washing machine is done by me these days so come to think of it we only need someone to look after Baby and cook for the Mrs during the confinement period.

Thankfully my working place and hours are rather flexible so I foresee myself coming home early to look after the 2 of them. I can go into office late too which means I can prepare all the necessary stuffs in the morning and then come back like 4pm to check on them.

As I can't cook my main concern is the confinement food for the Mrs. We may end up ordering confinement food for the whole month which is still cheaper then getting a maid or engaging a confinement lady. Our confinement period should be January next year so from what I understand these confinement ladies are asking for an arm and a leg as it is close to Chinese New Year. Besides, their wages do not cover the ingredients that we have to buy in order for her to cook.

I know there are daddies who did the confinement with their wives so some input from you guys will be helpful. However I have this strong feeling you are all able to cook right? In any case although my work hours are flexible I will not be able to go to work late, come back and prepare lunch then go back to work again before finally coming home by 4-ish.

What about you ladies? What are your thoughts? Any other options that we can explore?

Lost

Usually the Mrs is the one who does all the research and planning for the two of us. Yes, I know, I’m spoilt. Take for example when we go for a holiday she will check out which hotel to stay, the flight details and she even packs for the both of us. I will take out all my stuffs and she will fold and tug them neatly in the suitcase.

However since her pregnancy she is running really low on energy or maybe I should say that she is running on reserve energy after a long day at work. Weekend is spent mostly on sleeping for her.

Previously all her time and energy was spent on researching on how to increase our chances of getting pregnant and now that we have succeeded, we are a little lost when it comes to the preparation for Baby’s coming.

I know she would have preferred to do the research herself since she knows she can’t really trust me as I am usually rather careless when it comes to details. I am more of the chauffeur and the “pick one between the two” type of helper.

With some reluctance she has asked me to take care of the research and planning this time round!?!?! She wants to know where can we go for prenatal classes, what type of classes and when should we start. She also wants to buy those cute baby posters for the bedroom. Now this I am not sure if it is really necessary since I don’t need Baby to look like those Caucasian babies unless you ladies know where I can get the Chinese ones. However since she is Queen now, what she wants she gets.

I am also tasked to look into what furniture should go into the Nursery and also the safety measures needed. Problem is there are different schools of thoughts for something as simple as where should Baby sleep. I personally like the cot, a white one at that although some people may suggest the mattress or even the sarong.

Hmmm…. what else should go in the nursery bearing in mind we may have to hire a live-in maid, an issue that I will touch on very soon.

I am seriously at a lost and I don’t even know where to begin searching for this info. If the homework is on which Xbox 360 games, movies or latest digital camera to buy then no sweat. But baby stuffs and pre-natal classes?!?!

Thankfully I started this blog so I have you ladies (and a few guys) to turn to. So I am appealing to all of you for help. Please assist this clueless father-to-be on where to get what. You are welcome to add on to what I had mentioned above because knowing me, I could have overlooked 10 things by now already.

So let’s open the floodgate for suggestions and ideas. Your assistance will be greatly appreciated.

Food

One of the main things that I have learnt and I feel I should impart to all fathers-to-be who are reading this blog is "never order 2 portions of food when you are with your Missus during the initial stage of pregnancy".

I sort of learned this the hard way but thankfully I realised it early so the damaged was minimum and under control.

The Mrs is rather ambitious at times when it comes to food which is a good sign considering that it was barely a month ago when she had no appetite and could skip all meals. Initially when we ordered 2 portions of food for the both of us she will only eat about a third of hers before giving up and no points for guessing who will end up finishing them. It is not her fault entirely since she did not insist that I finished her share, er....................... come to think of it, actually not entirely true because although she did not insist she will ask me to try and not waste food. I will then agree to 'help' her with 2 or 3 spoons full but she usually scoped an extra 2 or 3 more before removing her plate from the table so I cannot reject her 'nice gesture'.

The above usually happens during dinner and soon I began to realise that this cannot go on if I were to have any hope of maintaining my waistline, let alone reducing it. For your information, we have a weighing scale at home and we weigh ourselves twice a day. Every morning when we wake up and every night after we reached home.

Nowadays I will order my own meal with finishing part of hers in mind. This is the safest bet because even if by some miracle she manages to finish her own share, I can always order an extra something to complete my meal. But if we were to eat something that the Mrs truly love such as steaks, the Japanese Yakitori and any kind of vegetables, she can actually finished them provided she is given the time to slowly go through her meal.

The Mrs has always have the habit of snacking but these days she likes to buy these muffins, cakes and other sweet snacks only to be thrown away about 2 days later. Whenever we pass by any place that sells some kind of sweet snacks or tidbits, more often than not she will not be able to resist the temptation to buy them. To be fair to her these were always bought with the intention to be consumed.

Although the Mrs has not started having any major cravings yet, 9pm seems to have this effect on her appetite. She will usually start to have these minor cravings about this time. The problem is her cravings are almost never constant. They vary from Lor Mee to Curry Puff to Porridge to Cheeseburgers and most recently Subway's Turkey Wrap. She had that for 3 nights in a row. She did not mind eating that because it was relatively healthy since it is turkey breast and lots of vegetables. We bought them in advance, after dinner and on the way home anticipating that she might want it later on.

Oh and fathers-to-be, I also don't think is a good idea to watch all the variety shows on TV that recommend good, nice and cheap food with your Missus unless you are prepared to drive out every night to buy them. Although it did made the Mrs crave for the food she did not make me drive out to buy but it could happen to you.

You have been warned!

Oscar

No, Oscar is not the name the Mrs and I have picked for Baby. It is actually the name of the test that the Mrs went through last week. During the Oscar Test the Mrs had to go through an abdominal scan as well as have her blood drawn.

I was kind of worried that during the scan we will be able to tell if Baby is a boy or a girl. A little premature I know, but I was worried my surprise will be ruined none the less. Thankfully we were not able to tell yet.

So, according to Dr Cheng what we should look out for are the nasal bone and the nuchal translucency. To be able to see the nasal bone at this stage is a good thing as it indicates the low risk of Down's syndrome. As for the nuchal translucency you want it to be thin. He then proceeded to measure Baby's head and abdominal circumference.

From the scanes Baby looked good and normal but in order to know for sure we had to wait for the blood test result to be out. By entering all the measurements of Baby, results from blood test and the Mrs's age into a program, Dr Cheng will be able to calculate the risk of Baby having Down's syndrome.

The report was mailed to us and according to the nurses at Dr N's clinic Baby is cleared. The report is very technical and with no one explaining it to us I can only assume from the figures there which states: Adjusted risk - 1:10060 for Trisomy 21 and 1:17519 for Trisomy 13/18. I do not need an expert to tell me that those odds look pretty good.

There were a couple of graphs as well and Baby's result is right there in the middle for all of them.

The Mrs was saying that we are lucky in the sense that Baby has been very cooperative so far when it comes to taking pictures. We have been able to take pretty good shots of Baby so far. Let's hope the Mrs will still find Baby cooperative once Baby starts moving and kicking around.