Friday, 5 October 2007

Away

I believe to most husbands like me, going away on a business trip is not the easiest thing to do especially when his wife is pregnant.

The Mrs and I are blessed in a sense that we have an excellent relationship and we do almost everything together. We go to work together, we have dinner together everyday after work and we spent every weekend together as well.

This is all good except when I have to go away occasionally for my work. During these times I will always wonder if she will be alright on her own. It is made worse now that she is pregnant.

It would have been easier if we were living with our parents but we only have Ah No in our small family. Initially I made the wrong decision of leaving Ah No with my parents whenever I travel because it requires some work taking care of him and since the Mrs is pregnant I do prefer for her to rest more and not have to look after Ah No. Did I mention that Ah No likes to “bully” her? He likes to hop onto the bed whenever my back is turned and while the Mrs is on it. No matter what she does he will not leave the bed.

This trip however I decided to leave Ah No behind to accompany the Mrs because from my last trip I learned that she will be better off with him by her side. I know she will feel lonelier if she were to come back to an empty home every night. At least with Dino around she has some form of contact and companionship.

I normally take care of most of the things at home. She can sleep through a mini storm knowing that I will wake up to close all the windows. Up until about 2 months ago when I lost my phone from one of my business trips, I had also always been the one to set the alarm to wake us up every morning.

I will normally be the one to ensure that nothing new is left on our bedside tables because Ah No will pick it up in the middle of the night and would have eaten half of it by the next morning. The Mrs has lost a couple of things, most notably her Nokia Sirocco handphone pouch this way. This is an item that we are unable to replace till today.

I had half a day at home to pack and prepare for my trip to Mumbai, India so I took the opportunity to try and get things organized for her. Some of the things that went through my mind was to remove the phone and iPod cables that were lying on the bedside table, replace the battery on our 2 face clock. Ensure that Dino has enough food to last him till this weekend when I will be back. Knowing that she will be driving to work everyday while I’m away, I made sure the cashcard and petrol are topped up. I had to ensure that the PC headphone is taken out for her so that we can chat via Skype every night.

I had originally wanted to pick up some TVB Cantonese drama serial for her but she insisted that she will be fine. That prompted me to remind her not to work too late while I’m away. Knowing her, she will work much later knowing that I will not be waiting for her to knock off each day.

For the 4 days that I will be away, a lot of preparation and thinking had to be put in hence I am really not looking forward to my next trip away to Shanghai in November unless of course the Mrs can tag along and believe me, she would very much like to.

35 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi, interesting blog u hv here. Ur wife is sooooo lucky to hv a caring hubby =).... BTW, sorry to KPO - i guess ur baby is a girl... =)

Unknown said...

ur mrs is blessed to have such a caring hb like u. :) p.s. i think ur bb's a girl too.

A Husband's Voice said...

Good Morning Ladies,

That makes the 3 of you who guess that Baby is a girl. The other one being the Mrs herself.

For some reason most think that Baby is a boy. Actually those who have seen the Mrs's tummy said that Baby is a boy. You know, the old saying that sharp = boy?!

We really wonder how true is that.

Anonymous said...

hi, i love your blog. in fact, i am so envious of your mrs to have such a caring hubby.
how i wish my hubby is like you *SIGH*

anyway, be it your bb is a gal or a boy, i m sure both u and ur mrs will love him/her very much.

Lionel n Rachel said...

I'm the 4th person who really envies ur mrs for having such a caring & doting hb.

Boy or girl, it does nt matter. Wats important is health. Hw many mths to go b4 the arrival of ur little one? 2 more mths, i assume?

Yvonne.

Lionel n Rachel said...

ehhh...just saw ur "baby's progress" chart...96 days to go..hehe! jiayou. cheers!

Yvonne

Nicole said...

I just realised that your Mrs EDD and mine are indeed very close! Only few days apart, in fact.

I reckon she's starting to feel the little one's kickboxing ya??

So, how's your Mrs feeling nowadays? I'm starting to feel kinda restless and also, moody. I think that's the hormones again...

Your Mrs's tummy any bigger? Expanding fast???

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi Ladies,

You are making me blush.

I'm sure there are husbands who are as doting if not more. Maybe I am better at expressing myself.

The Mrs has always said I am good with words so I guess that helps.

The other husbands will show their love in other manner.

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi Anonymous,

Thanks for following my blog and the progress for both the Mrs and Baby.

Yes, we will love Baby no matter the gender. In fact it does not matter to me which gender because ultimately I would like to be a father to both genders since the parenting will be rather different.

Do leave an alias or name the next time you comment so I'll know it's you.

Cheers

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi Yvonne,

Thanks for your support! Yeah, EDD is 9th Jan.

Since you are an experience mum, for the first child will it normally be earlier or later? I've had people telling me its both so I'm not sure.

Keep blogging. Maybe you're not aware but I do follow your blog too.

Cheers

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi Nicole,

Yeah, you forgot you mentioned the fact that both your EDD and the Mrs's are a few days apart in your first comment.

She is really feeling Baby's kick now. When I called her earlier she stopped talking for a few moment cause Baby kicked her really hard! I was telling her that was because Baby recognised my voice and he / she misses me too. Ha Ha

The Mrs is feeling more tired these days and that is one of the reasons why I rather be back with her. She is most uncomfortable at night because she could not find a comfortable position to lie down before falling asleep. She is always complaining that her stomach feels very stretched. Any tips?

Her tummy hasn't grown much and her weight has steadied at about +2kg. Maybe Baby will grow by leap and bounce during the last few weeks.

Fingers crossed!

Anonymous said...

I think your Mrs is expecting a boy (just my intuition) hee hee :)

Anyway that sharp or round tummy theory is not true at all loh. My colleague is expecting a girl now and her tummy is quite sharp. I had an ex-colleague expecting a boy last time and her tummy was so round. So where is the theory??? :P I have pple telling me I am expecting a girl since I have some spotting once and have evening sickness. But mine is a boy leh...

Anyway, coming back to your input for today. I can really empathise with you and your Mrs. My hb travels a lot too, almost every month for 2 wks. I am quite an independent girl so quite used to it actually but like you, he finds it difficult to leave the pregnant wife alone at home! BTW, I am living with my in laws okie but he still 不放心 loh. Haha. Mayb its our first, that why so kah chiong.

Just answering your qn re "the first child, will it normally be earlier or later?" It can be both but most cases its later and I have checked this with all my colleagues , relatives and friends who delivered before. :) Even if its earlier its abt ave 38 wks...

Anonymous said...

hi, your blog is cool and very interesting. the mrs is very fortunate to have you take care of her the way you do. =)

by the way, i'm so envious reading about how mummies' babies have been kicking them. i'm 22 weeks into it, and haven't really felt my little girl move. not that i can really tell the difference between baby moving and gas moving inside though. *haha* can't wait to see my midwife next week for her to tell me baby is fine!

keep up the good work! i look forward to more posts from you!

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi Reishi,

Wow! 2 weeks every month!?! That is terrible! I can't imagine having to go through it. It must be hard on you both.

Yeah, I have my suspicion that the sharp and round theory is nothing but old wives tales.

Thanks for your clarification on 1st child being later than EDD. I'm hoping for 1st Jan but I know that is unlikely.

So you think Baby will be a boy. Okay I shall keep tab on all your guesses.

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi no man's land,

Welcome! Thanks for your input.

I think I have to state that what I do for the Mrs is really nothing. She is the one who is going through all the morning sickness, bloatedness, fatigue and emotional roller coaster ride. This is really the least that I can do for her, to make her as comfortable as possible.

Actually I am very lucky to have the Mrs as well. It is really not all one sided. I feel that we are blessed to have this relationship.

As you know the Mrs was also rather worried about not feeling Baby's kick initially but now it is coming fast and furious. I understand from her that sometimes during work, she will suddenly stop whatever she is doing because Baby kicked her very hard. Don't worry, I'm sure you will feel it eventually too!

Anonymous said...

hi, you're right. a relationship is a two-way traffic. my husband shows his concern too, in his own gruff, inarticulate ways. *haha* so let me rephrase it, you and the mrs are so fortunate to have found each other. =)

and the thing about baby moving, i really really can't wait. say, kick me baby! kick!!

Lionel n Rachel said...

halo, i agree with reishi. 1st child normally arrives late but there are also exceptions. like my 1st, he came @ 36 weeks gestation.

Haha. U wanna hv urs on the 1st Jan 2008 @ exactly 12 am to welcome the new year. Keep telling to baby, he/she might decide to give u a surprise as well.

Thanks for following my blog. Will keep updating.

Nicole said...

Haha! OH Ya, I did. I obviously forgotten about it. It's like the pregnancy took a chuck off my memory(haha, blaming on the hormones and the pregnancy)..Hee...

Hmm..for myself, as claire was born premature, so it's earlier. I seriously hope that this time round, my second one can pop out after 38th week.

Stretch...maybe it's cause her tummy is expanding to accomadate the growing fetus, that's why.

For myself, as it's my second pregnancy, I'm starting to feel the contractions already, which according to the gynae, it's noraml.

I'm gaining about 1 kg per month. Yeah, I know, it's not much, so I have no problem sleeping at night as the tummy is really quite small now. I think my 6months+ tummy is no difference from other mother's 3months+ tummy....

Back to 'guessing' or 'predicting' whether the baby is a girl or boy, it seriously doesn't matter. My friends are still trying to find out the gender of my baby by asking me things like ' so you're getting pink or blue', 'so need to buy new things or can share claire's stuffs'? etc etc..Just trying to fish out the information. Which I think can be quite 'irritating', since already made known to them that I'll not be revealing. That's human nature for all of us. Haha

Unknown said...

i dun think sharp tummy is v accurate cos u've seen mummies wif "sharp" tummies b4 n the bb turned out to b a girl. :) perhaps i'm not tat "experienced" in "tummy analysis". lol.

Unknown said...

btw like reishi, my hb travels often for his work too. he's often stuck at client's sites for 3 wks a mth n it's oni lately tat he's back for longer period of time. as a 1st time father, he's being v concerned tat i'm left on my own but like reishi, i'm rather independent n can survive v well on my own. Except i nd some1 to clean up the hse cos i cant bend anymore thks to my big belly. :P

Anonymous said...

your Mrs is one lucky woman!!

as for the gender of the baby, i trust the predictions of the older folks, they based it on the shape of the tummy and butt. i have a boy and during my entire pregnacy, everyone guessed its a boy!!! 100% accurate!!

your bb's EDD happens to be my hubby's birthday!!

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi no man's land,

Yeah. We are all lucky in our own ways.

Be careful what you wish for cause soon you will definitely feel it! Ha Ha

The Mrs will out of the blue shout "Ah Ya!" cause Baby kicks her rather hard. We are now resulting to placing light objects on her tummy to see it bounce whenever Baby is in action.

Come to think of it, why are we always associating babies movement with kicking? Maybe Baby is a natural boxer?

Take care and keep reading

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi Yvonne,

The real reason for wanting Baby to be born on 1st Jan is so that he / she can save a year in life.

I used to have this classmate in secondary school who was born on 1st Jan the year after I was born. So in reality she is 1 year younger but she was attending same class as me. So she literally saved a year in her life.

I'll try talking to Baby see if he / she is willing to cooperate.

Come to think of it, do we have to pay more for giving birth on a PH?

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi Nicole,

The Mrs is also using the hormones and pregnancy for her forgetfulness. Ha Ha

Miss Claire was born premature? By how much? My new born nephew is also premature and is now in intensive care until he reaches 2kg.

The Mrs's weight is still stagnant and her tummy is also not growing by too much. But I believe you win hands down. From the picture in your blog, you do not even look pregnant.

Human nature mah. The more you don't want to reveal the more they are dying to know. Like I said we are driving many people up the wall.

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi jj,

You are another "unfortunate" MTB that has to spend so much time at home.

I think I have to clarify that the Mrs is actually very independent as well. She takes very good care of herself whenever I'm away.

Many times it is just down to me being overly anxious. Hee Hee

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi Missy,

Thanks but I believe we're both as lucky.

I'll keep you posted if Baby follows the traditional theory of sharp and round tummy.

Looks unlikely Baby will share the DOB as your husband. I don't believe many babies actually stick to the EDD right?

Unknown said...

no la. we ladies r not "unfortunate" cos we have hubbies like u who worry abt us. :)

Nicole said...

Oh yes, she's born premature. During my 35+weeks. I was sleeping at night when my water bag just suddenly gushed out. Imagine, the daddy wasn't at home and was attending a wedding dinner. He sped all the way home to sped me to Mount E. Must have frightened the shit out of him...Haha!

Ms Claire was considered a very good weight when born. She's born at 2.410kg, 47cm. Surprisingly, my gf's full term baby is of the same weight and height as well. I was even told that if Ms Claire was a full term baby, she'll be a giant. Haha!

If you can see from the pics in her blog, she's rather tall and chubby so no one can tell she's a preemie. :)

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi Nicole,

Yeah, I definitely cannot tell Miss Claire was born premature.

My nephew is born at 32 weeks and he weighs less than 2kg so he has been in ICU since last Monday. According to the Dr, he has to remain in there until he reaches at least 2kg.

Besides, he has also some other complications.

Needless to say everyone in the family is rather anxious and worried.

Nicole said...

Certainly. I can imagine the anxiety. For myself, I'm also extremely paranoid that I might give birth prematurely again...TOUCHWOOD!

When I was pushed into the delivery suite, I was basically frightened to tears when I realised that I'm going to give birth prematurely and was so so worried that Claire might not survive and things like that...Glad things turned out ok for us.

I'm sure things will turn out well for your nephew as well.

Do keep us updated ya.

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi nicole,

Thanks for your concerns.

Besides the baby's health condition there is also the medical bills to think about.

I wonder what are the charges for the ICU in SGH for premature babies on a per day basis. It is surely cheaper than Mt E but I imagine it to be rather substantial as well.

My nephew has been in there since 1st October and there is no indication when he will be out.

Nicole said...

That's why some people, they'll register themselves at KKH first in case of any complications. Meaning to say, they'll not give birth there but will go there for the sake of it to register, in case if they go to private hospital for delivery and have any complications,they can fall back on KKH.

If you've not registered at KKH before and wanna go there should there be any complications, they might reject your case as their hospital are heavily subsided. That's what I heard from others. That's why those who gave birth at private hospitals who had complications will wanna go back to KKH, cause of the technology and also, cause of the subsidies.

Hopefully, the bill wouldn't be too ex for your nephew and he will be 2kg soon. :)

noshidoshi said...

hi, i just found ur blog. my EDD is 8th jan, which is a day earlier than ur wife! which hospital did u both choose? we are at ESH.

im hoping my child will be born on 1st jan too, hehe.

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi Nicole,

Really?! I didn't know about such arrangements.

However Dr N will tell us that Mt E is the best place to be in case of any complications since most of the best doctors are there. Ha Ha

A Husband's Voice said...

Hi shida,

Welcome to A Husband's Voice. I hope you will find my blog interesting enough to come back again.

The Mrs and I will most probably settle for Mt E.

You are the first person that I know of that will be giving birth at ESH.

I'm still hopeful that Baby will cooperate and pops out on 1st Jan. Fingers crossed. You keep us posted ya?