Teachings!

Long before we got pregnant the Mrs and I have been observing from the outside at how parents raise their kids and how these kids behave in public. Sometimes I see things that I agree and would like for us to emulate in our teachings I will immediate share it with the Mrs and we will make mental notes to incorporate it. Likewise when we see things or methods that we disagree with, we will also share and make it a point to not do it in the future.

Case in point; about a year or more ago, we were having lunch at Greenwood area and while walking to the restaurant we saw this really cute Caucasian toddler (can’t be more than 3 years old) happily unwrapping his ice cream and then looking and smiling mischievously at his dad. Being his dad, the man immediately knew what his boy was going to do and he warned him with a stern “No!”. Still this boy threw the wrapper into the drain and ran screaming and very happily away. I was really amazed at what happened next. The father ran after him; caught him and then lower him into the drain which is dry of course and insisted that he picks up the wrapper. He then brought the boy to a proper bin and have him throw it in there. Once done the father cleaned his hands before allowing him to continue with his ice cream. That is something that I will remember for life. How many times have we seen parents (local and otherwise) allowing their children to litter the place or worst still lead by example and litter or spit themselves? I told myself then that this is one teaching that I will surely emulate when I eventually have my own kids.

It could be due to all the game consoles and online interactions, I find that kids these days require a lot of work on their interaction and social skills. They may become some kind of a loner and are often “shy” towards people and worst still rude towards their parents and grandparents.

We have encountered instances where we told our friends and relatives that they should not allow their kids to do things such as talking back to their grandparents or sleeping really late at night etc but sometimes we get the response, “Ah ya! You don’t know lah. Wait till you have your own kids. Then you’ll know it is not as easy as you think!”

While I agree that we are no parents and that raising kids with the right values is not easy, I strongly disagree that we need to be parents to understand the basic do’s and don’ts. Simple things like talking back or raising voice with their grandparents, littering and being rude and disrespectful to someone else’s things are common courtesy that require only common sense. These days we simply watch with our jaws dropped and we have since decided against making our opinion known. We can only hope and pray that Baby will turn out just fine. He / she doesn’t have to be a model citizen but definitely no menace to the society too.

We were at Ikea Tampines 2 Sundays ago and I was a little scared after spending about half an hour at the canteen watching the little monsters! Ha Ha Ha! They were really loud and messy!!! These are 2 things that I cannot tolerate. I like quiet, not library quiet but not constant screaming either and I like things clean too. At this point I have to clarify that I do not have OCD or at least I do not think so. I can still tolerate things to a certain extent. I understand kids need to let go of their system occasionally but I really do not appreciate kids talking really loudly (to the extent of screaming) when the place is not that noisy. I understand that kids are playful and would like to jump around but my bed is a strict off limit zone. The Mrs is also not allowed to walk on the bed. Bed to me should be clean because that is where we sleep.

I remembered an incident when I was still in secondary school, I was eating laksa and I dropped the piece of tau kua back into the bowl and naturally my white school uniform ended up with a few stains. I gave up eating and went home to change before going back to study. A little extreme, I know. Even till today, I have to be really careful with my noodles and gravy. If a small stain is found on my shirt and I still have a long day ahead, I will not hesitate going out to buy a new shirt to change into.

So I was sitting there at Ikea imagining me having to share the same table with a very messy toddler who is splashing the spaghetti gravy everywhere and at the same time screaming happily away! I looked at the Mrs and I’m sure she could see my worried expression.

I consider myself a rather impatient person so I am a little worried with how I am going to cope with Baby. I saw this lady feeding her toddler and she offered this piece of French Fries to the boy but each time he turned his head and pushed her hand away with his. But credits to her because her persistence paid off for on the fifth attempt, the boy probably decided that his "nagging" mother will not take no for an answer and ate the fries. At this point in time, I think the "now" me will offer once or twice and if the answer is still no then fine, let me know when you want ok? But who knows about the "then" me. For all we know I am more persistent then the lady at Ikea.

I think the teaching of the right values is easier as it will take time to cultivate the character but my immediate worry is how to handle crying, screaming and messy babies……..