Being a mum-to-be is hard. Being a working mum-to-be is even harder. No disrespect to you 'non-working stay home' mums-to-be as I'm sure you have your own sets of difficulties too.
The Mrs works in a small office with only 2 staffs reporting to her. Being in such a small office the impact of any staff going away on leave or MC can be rather big. If you think about it, when one person is away from work the strength is down by 30% which is very significant. Bigger offices or departments will not truly appreciate this because they are almost never this shorthanded.
The one issue that I will always have with the Mrs is her working too hard, in my opinion. Before she is pregnant, she can work till she forgets to drink water for the whole morning or simply cannot find the time to go to the toilet. Many times I have to call her just to stop her from whatever she is doing and remind her to 'breathe'.
Now that she is pregnant, things have not gotten any better. Take yesterday for example. I do not know what exactly happened in her office but by the time she came down an hour after her official knock-off time, she was feeling the pull on her tummy and she was trying so hard to catch her breath. She was exhausted.
She was so drained that she did not feel like eating so I suggested that we go on home and come out for dinner after she has rested.
She fell asleep in the car on the way home and again the minute she touched the bed. I was worried that she may wake up in an hour and she may feel like eating so I decided to wait and not have my dinner first.
At about 9.30pm, about 2 hours of nap later, she woke up but it was not because she was rested. She woke up because she felt like vomiting. By then I had just finished my bowl of instant noodle. In any case she did not feel like eating also.
I'm sure how she felt was not entirely due to her work during the day but I believe it must have something to do with it to a certain extend. I have reminded her many times that nothing is more important than her health and Baby now but I guess it is easier said than done. Especially in middle management where your boss will look to you when something is not done right and your subordinates will seek guidance, instructions and directions from you.
Having said the above I also have to be fair to her colleagues and boss too. They have been very sweet and assisted her in any way they could. They will not allow her to climb, carry heavy things or run about to get stuffs. The biggest problem now is that their manpower is down by 30% indefinitely because a colleague has resigned not too long ago and a suitable replacement has not been found yet.
Being in such a small office has also additional stress when she is not feeling well. Sometimes although she was not feeling too well in the morning, she had to drag herself to work. Dr N has given her the look before when he wanted her to go home to rest but she insisted that her office was shorthanded hence she had to go back.
She is also feeling extremely guilty for having to take the 3 months maternity leave after Baby is born so much so that she is considering taking only 2 months to rest.
I guess the only solution is for her to stop work and be a Tai Tai right? She would like that I'm sure. The topic has come up for discussion many times now but unfortunately for her I cannot afford to have her as a Tai Tai yet. She can only be a Si Lai (think Cantonese) for now........
3 comments:
Well, I know how you feel..work and baby. I have made a choice about that. I have recently tendered my resignation so I can get a good rest during my pregnancy. Mind u, it was not easy, I took a long time to reach that decision. Of course, belts will have to be tightened and it helps that my husband and me were not leading an extravagrant lifestyle originally. Of course, understanding from family is also a must : ) We can get a job anytime but of course, we have to be realistic when we return to the workforce later eg deal with drop in pay and lack of work prospects. We only have one mothering chance to our baby but we have plenty of opportunities to work later : ) just to share..
Guilty of that too… I remember when I was pregnant I was still working in some huge MNC and trust me the workload was crazy.
I too had like 4 staff under me and if either one of them on MC or holiday… I will get it big time. I remember one of them went on maternity leave and I was stuck there doing her stuff plus my stuff for 3 months (plus she was one of my best staff.. super efficient so her on leave was like TWO person gone!) On top of that another one staff resigned during that 3 months period so I was covering 2 persons job… that was like the can die period man. But no matter how busy I am, every month I will definitely take one full day off for my check up.
There was never enough time to get all the job done and being in the super fast pace industry I was super duper quick tempered. Which I tell you SERIOUSLY will affect/ influence the bb. Now my DD is also super duper quick tempered. Want means want… faint… all thanks to me lah…
So remember to remind the Mrs that no matter how busy, angry she is at work… must control if not the bb will really pick up that...
i was guilty of tat too. right now, i'm trying to tk it slow. stopping work is not an option right now and i do enjoy working so though my current job is not my ideal 1, i will continue doing so as it's not as stressful as before. i guess being a mtb has sort of helped me spaced out my work n do them more efficiently. :)
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